I make a mean Salmon Salad. With your cooking skills I would recommend buying a squeeze jar of the premade tuna salad dressing though. 
just kidding. I like mine either stuffed in a tomato, or a Tuna(Salmon) melt. Although the Salmon Melt does require the use of a pan or griddle. I have also adapted crabcake recipes to use canned salmon instead of the crab. Those are the easiest recipes I can come up with off the top off my head.
Yeah, plus Halon is completely safe to spray on someone whose clothing is on fire, even on the face. Not necessarily so with dry chem, although I would still chance it if a family member were on fire. Dances, can you share your espertise on this topic?
My pet peeve is that they banned halon extinguishers in Canada, because halon damages the ozone layer. What a crock of sh*&+, putting people’s safety below the ozone layer. It’s not like I’m spraying with the damn thing evertime the kitchen smells a bit too much like fish.
[micro-rant]
Racken, fracken, ^%$#^#@ grumble, bleepin tree huggers.
[/micro-rant] 
Can you get CO2 units at retail stores? That sounds safe enough, assuming the subject doesn’t, like, breathe it for two minutes. It’s in all our soft drinks, after all…
BTW, good list Featherlou.
IIRC, Halon has been banned in the US for quite a few years also. I’ve got a 3.5 pound Halon unit that’s 18 years old that I don’t know what to do with. Gauge is still solidly in the green, but at this age, can I trust it? Aside from the ozone issue, Halon’s actually just this side of bad for lightweight class-A fires - the gas comes out so strongly that it tends to blow things around.
I’ve never seen CO[sub]2[/sub] at hardware stores. You’d need to go to a fire extinguisher shop for that, and have it inspected annually.
That’s actually a pretty good gift idea. Most people I know don’t have extinguishers anywhere, let alone the hot spots. I have one in the kitchen, one in the car, and one in the basement (by the furnace).
Oh, and I’ll be setting a kitchen fire deliberately tomorrow. Tequila shrimp. 
Re the can of salmon: At the grocery store, get a salad bag, like mixed field greens or baby spinach or something, plus a bottle of sesame dressing, and, for texture, something crunchy like chow mein noodles. Thoroughly drain the salmon, flake it, mix it with the greens, and dress. It’ll take two minutes, and will be yummy and good for you.
I can cook, and I like mac & cheese with canned salmon in it. But this sounds really, really yummy. I might have to try it sometime.
Fun story - in college I lived in the local equivalent of slum apartments (in a college town, aren’t they all slum apartments?) a low income single mother moved in next door. I’m not sure what line of work she was in, but I’m fairly certain she counted ceiling tiles. Not the sharpest tool in the box, if you catch my drift. One day she knocked on my door. When I answered she asked me casually if I knew how to use “that red thing.”
Me: “What red thing?”
Her: “That red thing on the wall.”
Me: (suddenly it dawns on me) “You mean the fire extinguisher?”
Her: nods
Me: “Is there a fire in your apartment?”
Her: nods
I ran down the hall to her apartment, and sure enough, there were huge flames gusting out of her oven. Her kid was standing there, vacantly watching the flames. Yes, she had left her kid in the kitchen to watch the fire as she went out in the hallway knocking on stranger’s doors. I grabbed the extinguisher and put it out. Sheesh. I still wonder what would have happened if I hadn’t been home.
Yikes. At least she was able to connect two brain cells and understand, however slightly, that the red thing was to be used when things turn hot, bright and orange.
As a longtime Seattle resident, this is obviously better with fresh salmon, rather than canned.
To make it extra yummy, grill the salmon over coals after marinating it in, and regularly brushing it with, a liquid of lime juice, ginger juice, honey, and minced garlic, plus a dash of salt. (Works well with chicken, too.) Flake the grilled salmon (or cut the chicken into bite-sized slices) and mix it with the salad. If you’re feeling extra ambitious, toast some sesame seeds, and add a couple tangerine wedges on the side.
But if you’re stuck with a can of salmon, there are certainly worse things you could do with it.
Duhhrrr. Crappy grammar.
I are a college gradumate.