Boy Broomstick, you get to have all the fun.
At least with municipal waste, the output is being heavily diluted as compared with flushing to a home septic tank. I’m guessing the concern with the septic tank is that the chemo drugs might be concentrated enough to kill off beneficial bacteria or something.
I’m glad he’s doing a bit better and able to eat a bit, though I’m sorry this is as part of another hospital stay :(. I’ve always said a hospital is no place for a sick person.
Health benefits nearly bollixed up: :eek::eek::eek: - I’m sooooo glad that got straightened out (and kudos to the folks who did their jobs and fixed it for you, phew!!!).
Yes. It WILL kill off all the bacteria. On the upside, with him being in the hospital post-chemo most of this cycle he really didn’t put that much into the system. Basically, though, the tank acts as a holding tank, and you get it pumped to get rid of the problem. Then you start the tank over.
I’m still not entirely sure this is really the best of all possible answers, though.
Gee, didn’t realize it’s been a week since I last posted.
Short recap:
Bad nurse left my weak husband in a recliner all night one night, ignoring him, his call light, etc. Still a bit too upset to go into it tonight, but the husband is having full blown panic attacks over it. He’s home now and safe but I am having Very Evil Thoughts.
First cycle of chemo complete.
My best friend and her husband scheduled to arrive Sunday. Kind souls have donated a couch replacement (twin bed, boxspring, mattress), walker, and rollator, also to arrive with them. They will be staying the week to give me a break. Her husband is an LPN with extensive home health care experience, I’m sure that will come in handy.
I’m glad help is on the way. I hope you both can rest and recharge.
Can’t trust hospitals. My father, shortly before he died, was taken for an MRI at 3:00. They told us to wait. By 6:00 they said he was still down there. At 7:00 still not back, so we went to the MRI room. The tech was just locking up. He said my father had been finished hours earlier. We (the family) searched the hospital for him. Found him on a gurney freezing in a darkened hallway. You must be the advocate for your husband. Don’t trust them, they’re either too busy or don’t care.
**Vicsage, **what in the world made you think that relating a horror story about your father would be in any way helpful for me? Did you think I didn’t know that? Do you propose I stay at my husband’s side literally 24/7, and if so, will you then pay my rent, feed our pets so they don’t die due to lack of attention, mind the bills and do all the other things that require me to NOT be in the hospital? And get me a new job after I abandon my current one?
Or are you going to volunteer to pay a lawyer to pursue legal remedies for us?
Because those are things that might help. Your story did not help. Indeed, I get a distinct vibe that you somehow thing I was ignorant of potential risks and it’s my own damn fault someone abused my husband, because I wasn’t vigilant enough, needing to, you know, occasionally get some sleep myself.
There are excellent people working hospitals. There are scum working in hospitals.]
Mr. Broomstick was in the hospital because he required I simply could not give him at home. Maybe you think I should have just let him die at home? Or did you have some alternative in mind?
Next, time, try contributing something that might, you know, help.
Wow, I’m sorry that happened to your dad (and you.) It’s true that most who work in hospitals do care and are competent in their duties but yeah, sometimes things happen.
Broomstick, I’m very sorry you’re going through such a challenging time. However, this response was not appropriate for MPSIMS and is Jr Modding.
If you think a post is inappropriate report it, or use the pit.
No warning issued.
My friends arrived today with new spare bed, the old dead couch is gone, a lot of stuff got rearranged, much vacuuming, and I got some relief from nursing duties.
Glad they were available to help you clean up your home Broomstick. Maybe you will be able to feel comfortable allowing home health care in with their assistance. Sounds like a win!
Oh, no, the house isn’t clean - that was only the start…
Still not at all comfortable with strangers in the house, particularly if they’re alone with him. Given that what happened with the nurse has now triggered full blown panic attacks I don’t think he could tolerate being alone with strangers, he’d be too afraid of being victimized. Again.
He woke me up every half hour from midnight to 5 am. I now want to punch something. At least the friends will be able to spell me so I can get a nap after I finish breakfast.
Wow. I hadn’t read the thread in a week or more so I didn’t notice this whole bit about his being left in the recliner all bad word night. Please tell me this has been reported up the channels at the hospital - someone should get in a LOT of trouble (like fired) over it. Consider reporting it to whatever state authorities provide oversight, as well, when you have the time / energy.
And I’m sorry for the fallout - the panic, the justified fear of being alone (make sure he has a cell phone stashed if you ever DO have to leave him with someone), and the resulting exhaustion for you. That kind of severe sleep deprivation makes EVERYTHING look worse. If your friends can take the night shift for a couple nights, and let you get a solid 8 hours, you will feel incredibly better.
Any more thoughts on some sort of crowd funding? I’d be glad to send you some money that I forgot I owed you. :rolleyes:
Kid, as RL friends (we met once. good enough for me. ;)), you have my prayers, what good they do, and my good wishes. Tell him I think you’re cute. A desire to punch me can do wonders.
Ditto - pretty sure I owe you for some consulting you did for me a while back
There’s another thread about setting up a trust bank account for some post-transplant medical bills but the search is not responding right now.
I don’t know what the legalities are re gifts from others to help with medical bills, especially as pertains to your and Mr. Stick’s eligibility for state assistance, but it’s worth checking into.
I have been checking into it - it’s a potential minefield.
I know I haven’t been posting here much, but I am happy to say that my husband continues to very, very slowly improve. The chemo does seem to be knocking down the cancer.
More later.
Darn good news!
Yay on improvment!!
Did some googling and I haven’t found anything that specifically pertains to your situation - what I’ve seen is either not for state-sponsored health insurance, or not for Indiana - but it does suggest that help for some bills at least may be OK.
http://www.oneskyservices.org/files/library/sp_needs_trust_kitchen.pdf - talking about what can be gifted to someone on SSI. Things like giving you money for food and shelter would count, but paying bills for you would not (unless the bill is, say, for groceries).
http://www.masslegalhelp.org/income-benefits/tafdc/advocacy-guide/part4/q78-do-gifts-count-as-income (deals with Massachusetts rules, not Indiana): “The following gifts from people who do not have financial responsibility do not count as income…gifts (cash or non-cash) that are restricted for a specific purpose or paid to a vendor and are not countable as in-kind income.”
That earlier thread about a trust bank account: http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=20002861 - last I heard, the question had NOT been resolved but maybe there’s been some offline communication.
I’m also wondering - and this is convoluted - whether assistance gifted to you to compensate for YOUR lost income (lost due to caring for your husband) might be excludable from being considered “income”.
As long as the household total income doesn’t blow through the limits that let us keep our current health insurance it really doesn’t matter where the income comes from - family, friends, donation can at the local bar, panhandling, crowdfunding… The problem is that I’d have to figure out the numbers and that would be a pain in the backside.
I truly do appreciate the generosity of folks on this forum but for right now we’re doing OK financially. This is partly due to our health insurance covering just about everything, and my sister in Buffalo kicking us some money to cover my lost wages due to taking time off work some of the time, and management where I work doing their best to be supportive and keep me working as much as practical. So, for right now hold onto your generosity and if we do need money help I’ll clear a request through the mods and let you all know what’s needed.
We got a new “daybed” donated by helpful folks, which I mentioned before, and a rollator/transport chair which we’ve been using.
The husband is doing better mentally, is much more clear-headed. I can leave him alone while I’m at work with a phone by his side in case he needs to call for help. He’s slowly getting stronger in regards to sitting up, standing, and moving around. It’s still best if he has a “spotter” but if he had to he could get himself out of bed or out of a chair in an emergency.
The cancer doc says that clinically he’s doing much better.
We do have a problem with getting enough food into him. I’m told this is a common problem. It’s not so much nausea (he’s not having much) as extreme dry mouth making chewing and swallowing more difficult, and his system just not being able to handle much of anything at one time. A mix of tuna fish and green peas in Miracle Whip seems to be one of options that best agrees with him so I’m trying to get as much of that into as he can stand. That and “nutritional shakes” (Glucerna and Boost Glucose Control) and V-8 are most of what he’s consuming.
I’m at least getting sleep in intervals of 3-4 hours at a time, which is not ideal, but better than in the past. I keep hoping I’ll get a full uninterrupted 7-8 at some point but not right now.
Very frustrating dealing with the insurance company regarding his medications (never mind scans and tests!) They’re pushing back on everything. Also, had my asthma flare up and the doc prescribed a twice a day inhaled steroid which I still have not been able to get a week and half later due to insurance company bullshit. Fortunately, the oral medication he also gave me did give me sufficient relief but it’s really effing frustrating to add that into the mix.
Got a call from a “case manager” sent to us via the insurance company. I’m a bit skeptical about the whole thing, but I’ll be meeting with this person on Friday. Can’t hurt to know what other options/services I might be able to access. They did want to do a “home assessment” but I explained about the Nurse Incident and the spouse’s panic attacks and said that strangers in the house right now might not be a good idea. I get the sense the person is mainly concerned about accessibility and safety and I think I’ll take pictures of the entrance and the sick bed set up we have in the front room to show what we have in place. She offered to help us with obtaining medications. I said thanks, that’s appreciated, but what we really need is for the health insurance to stop denying needed tests (like the PET scan) and procedures (they pulled the authorization for maintenance on his nephrostomies less than 12 hours before the planned procedures). She said she’d look into it and see what she could do about it. Still feel a bit of “Hi, I’m from the [del]government[/del] insurance company and I’m here to help you” paranoia.