My OCD is driving me mad.

In My Humble Opinion
1

I’ve always had some form of OCD, but the compulsions have been just minorly annoying parts of my life. Lately they’ve been disrupting my life a lot more and it’s really getting to me.

I think the biggest problem is that my compulsions are manifesting with important things. I’m not obsessing over ordering my bookshelves by author, I’m obsessing over my door being locked.

The big things getting to me:

  • oven being off
  • front door locked
  • faucets off
  • car trunk shut

I know the first thing about getting over obsessive behaviour is to do something else to put it out of your mind, but my brain says ‘no, we can’t do that, if the oven isn’t off when you go to work you’ll burn the building down!’

I’ve been countering it by putting another ritual on top of it. Checking the oven knobs singing ‘off’ to the the tune of Jingle Bells. Taking a picture of the knobs with my iPhone. But my rituals aren’t working anymore - now I need to make sure I do the ritual and the original checking the oven knobs.

Also, my compulsive skin scratching has spread to my lower arms. Great, so now short sleeves aren’t enough to cover up the scabs.

Just needed to vent. No one really knows the extent of my OCD. My friends have obliged me when I try to shift things to them so I can rely on them having shut the bathroom faucet off, but they really don’t know how it rules my life. They just think I have a tiny bladder, not that I’ve basically fucked up my muscles through compulsive peeing.

2

Good, trustworthy therapy and medication now, dear, not later. Before you wind up being profiled on a TLC show.

3

There is absolutely help available for this, as long as you can afford it/have coverage. You sound like you’ve got a completely rational understanding of the situation and just need that little bit of help a professional can give you to get on top of it. Have you tried therapy for this before?

4

No, it won’t. I know this because Mr. Neville recently left the oven on all day between lunch and dinner. I didn’t figure it out until I went to preheat the oven to make dinner, and I thought he’d already preheated it to the wrong temperature.

In the same way, I know that leaving the stove burners on low for a long time won’t really do anything bad, as long as there is nothing sitting on them.

5

Yeah yeah I totally know. I’ve been in the system for eternity, it was just for anxiety and depression and those always seemed so much more important. Y’know how it goes, I can handle an endless bedtime ritual of OCD if the meds can make me functional enough to hold down a job so I can pay for the apartment the oven is in.

I have a follow-up appointment with a psych in May, I’ll bring it up then. I wish I would have been more proactive when I was in the good health region because this one is horrible. Ah Canada, where the healthcare is free, but you can’t get an appointment for another 6 months!

6

Threads on medical and psychological issues, even if they’re mostly anecdotal (not primarily requests for diagnoses or advice) go in IMHO, so I’ll move this thither for you.

twickster, MPSIMS moderator

7

Oh, dear–I have heard this from friends in England, too, who tell me, “you do *not *want socialized medicine!”

8

Well, the problem is always a matter of degree. You come in with a heart attack, you get treated before the guy with the broken wrist. So the dude who wants to jump off a building is going to get treated before the chick who sings Jingle Bells to her stove. Which is how it should be. But meanwhile, I’m still standing in the parking lot pounding on the trunk of my car to trick my mind into recognizing it really is closed.

Edit: Oh, and one of the saddest parts of the whole thing is that it has impaired my reading. I’ve slowed down a lot since my mind started demanding I find patterns in the text. Damnit, mind, I don’t care about finding 3 words in a row with the same amount of letters in them. I just want to go to the next page!

9

Unless you have zero access to medicine at all. Then you really want it.

It’s an imperfect system, but better than nothing, IMHO.

kushiel - could you try going to a walk-in clinic? I don’t really know anything about how OCD +anxiety/depression is treated, but I assume that there are typical first-effort medications and therapies that pretty much any doctor would look at first. Going to a walk-in could get you started on something that will help, with a prescription just long enough to get you to your scheduled doctor’s visit in May.

If your scheduled doctor is one you’ve seen for a long time, calling the office and explaining a dramatic worsening of symptoms could get you bumped to an earlier appointment; other people cancel for various reasons and I would think most doctors can squeeze in one or two “emergency” cases per week, at their discretion.

There is always the ER, particularly if you’re hurting yourself (your arms) - they might give you a script for something that may help tie you over until you see your regular doctor. Since you are actively harming yourself, they would have an interest in helping you before you get to the point of getting an infection or something.

There may be local support groups or therapy sessions that you can take advantage of now - look into what’s available in your area and see if you can get help with coping mechanisms.

Good luck!

10

I have OCD. It was aggravated by my ADD. I would sometimes be distracted by something shiny and thus not be paying attention while checking if the door was locked. I’ve found the being present in the moment when I do something helps. The other thing that really helps is medication. Paxil and Abilify are wonderdrugs.

11

CBT + SSRI or SNRI for OCD.

12

I really really sympathise and empathise, my OCD ruined my family life and I had no social life, it also fucked up my school life. Last year I started taking Prozac and oh my fuck it is amazing, I wish I was put on it sooner.

13

Gah! I didn’t mean to insinuate I was self-harming. I mean I pick at my skin, kinda like how people chew their nails or pull their hair. It’s more of an idle hands thing. Sort of how people pick at pimples?

Sorry guys, I didn’t mean to present this like it was an emergency! I meant it like how some people vent about their spouses annoying habits or whatever.

I’ve been on Paxil for an eternity. I’m sort of concerned about bringing this up to my doctor because of my anxiety. I don’t want to rock the meds boat, I’d rather be stable with OCD than try to treat it, cause a chemical imbalance and do something stupid like freak out and quit my job.

14

Sorry, I could not let this pass. The absolute last thing you want to do about obsessive thoughts is to put them out of your mind. That will just cause them to come back stronger than ever. (And it is the thoughts that drive your behavior.) The ultimate goal for recovery is to sit with those thoughts, and the anxiety, without engaging in the safety behavior, until you realize that it can’t harm you. This is best done under the guidance of a professional therapist, because if you do it wrong, it will backfire spectacularly.

OCD is one of the most easily treated conditions out there - you do not need to suffer. Get thee to an exposure therapist. It’s hard work, but it’s extremely effective. If you’re not sure what it’s all about, check out the TV show Obsessed (on Netflix instant watch.) It is a reality show that does a remarkable job of demonstrating the best evidence-based treatment available for sufferers of OCD. (Hopefully it will help motivate you too - some of those people have major issues.)

Disclaimer: I am not a doctor, or a person with OCD, just an informed consumer of mental health services. I have/had PTSD and have done various types of exposure therapies to confront anxiety.

15

I was reading through the thread, looking for someone to post exactly what olivesmarch4th said, or I would have posted pretty much the exact thing. I haven’t had OCD myself, but a close friend did, she counted (sevens) to the point that it was debilitating. She did the cognitive/exposure therapy demonstrated on that obsessed show, and she’s fine now. I’m so proud of her, and I’m sure you can do it, too kushiel. It took some work, and she has to catch herself and re-do some exercises she was given to help keep things in check, but she’s been “normal” for eight years or so.

16

I used to think that same way. Then I told myself that, fuck it, if the oven is on then its on and the house is gonna burn. Oh well. Since it didn’t, its a lot easier to ignore it now

17

I’ve never had to deal with it, but just a thought: While you’re waiting for a doctor’s appointment maybe check out one of the books regarding OCD on Amazon? (It’s always the first place I turn to.)

Good luck!

18

People tend to complain about the prevailing system, whatever it is, especially if they’re on the receiving end of services, and their expectations don’t take in to account the way the whole picture has to fit together.

You’ll find people everywhere also complain about the services they receive from their governments - but that doesn’t mean democracy is a bad idea.

19

I do wonder who these people are especially as ‘socialist’ is not a dirty word over here.

  1. All our political parties are completely committed to socialised medicine:

Conservative leader David Cameron has said the NHS will be his “number one priority”, as the main parties step up their pre-election campaigning.

Labour “We will scale down the NHS IT programme, saving hundreds of millions of pounds, and over the next four years, we will deliver up to £20bn of efficiencies in the frontline NHS, ensuring that every pound is reinvested in frontline care.”

http://www.smarthealthcare.com/labour-manifesto-nhs-it-cuts-12apr10

The Welsh Liberal Democrats will always be guided by the founding principles of the NHS - providing free care, when you need it, regardless of your ability to pay. Building on those principles, we will tackle the inefficiencies of the present organisation to achieve higher standards of care.

http://welshlibdems.org.uk/en/page/manifesto-2011-a-better-nhs-that-delivers-for-you

  1. Next the view of the general public:

“The government needs to start listening. voters will never forgive or forget the party that ruins our NHS.”

http://union-news.co.uk/2012/02/poll-show-62-dont-trust-coalition-to-handle-the-nhs-safely/

New research into public opinion on NHS funding shows that three-quarters would like to see extra money for the NHS coming from the Lottery.

http://www.ipsos-mori.com/researchpublications/researcharchive/1470/Public-Favours-Lottery-Money-To-Increase-NHS-Funding.aspx

  1. Finally my own experience of the NHS (over 58 years) is extremely positive.

My father had Parkinson’s, macular degenaration, high blood pressure, rheumatoid arthritis and needed a hip replacement. He got treatment for all of them promptly, prepaid by National Insurance contributions.
When my mother was suspected to have bowel cancer, she was in hospital within 45 minutes (she lived in the countryside), had an diagnostic operation that day and was given various treatment options within 48 hours.
I’ve been fortunate with my health. Nevertheless my doctor and dental treatment (plus opticians appointments) are prepaid by National Insurance contributions.
I’ve had a sigmoidoscopy and speech therapy, both available in the country town where I live.

If I travel to Western Europe, I fill out one form and am fully covered under reciprocal arrangements.
When I go to the US (lovely people!), I need to take out £1,000,000 of health insurance and to phone my insurance company from America before choosing any form of health care.

20

I have had to wait a long time to see a doctor–a GP. I made the appointment in early July and didn’t get into her office until early November. Not quite six months, but still mighty long. And I have excellent insurance, BTW.