On the upside, this explains a lot of his behavioral problems, such as emotional outbursts and tantrums, and possibly his oversensitivity (he can sometimes cry at inappropriate times). And his inability to stay on task.
They also said it’s mild ADHD, and he’ll be receiving a very mild dose of Ritalin daily. Hope it helps.
The downside? It’s something negative to deal with (although his poor behavior was, too, and it’s easier to deal with something that has a name and can be treated). I don’t mean this to be a whining “why me” thread, because I don’t look at life that way. I’ve always believed in playing the hand you’re dealt. And really, my life and that of my family is very good. Ubernormal, in some ways. Very little to complain about.
But I do feel sad that, for 8 years, this little guy has truly wanted to behave and simply been unable to. What a burden for a kid. In some ways, it’s harder to deal with a condition like this. After all, if he’d been born with cerebral palsy or some physical condition, we’d be faced with challenges, but we’d know what it was from the outset. We’ve been concerned for years and only now do we really know (he’s been getting therapy of one kind or another for about three years). I’m glad we found out.
But I did need to vent a little and try to sort my thoughts out. And I know I can do that here. Thanks. You’re good people.
My 8 year old also was diagnoised with ADHD. Poor kid.
I fought and fought to keep him off the medication, but we finally had to give in. He is so much happier now that he can deal with his frustrations and we understand the source of it and he can concentrate on tasks.
Talk to your doctor about Adderall instead of Ritalin. It doesn’t have the same side effects because it’s not as strong, but it doesn’t work for everybody.
Now that he’s been diagnoised you can really get to know the boy your son really is. Enjoy.
As I said in my OP, we’ve known for years that he had some kind of behavioral problem, and have had numerous psychologists and therapists look at him.
I see the process we’ve gone through as a kind of funneling, to narrow down the diagnosis. This was not a hastily-arrived-at conclusion, nor did it come from any of his teachers. It was almost a process of elimination, which has taken a long time to reach.
We’re not accepting this diagnosis to make our lives easier, or the teachers’ lives easier. We’re accepting it to make our son’s life easier.
I know everyone’s got a different story to tell, and I also understand that medicating disruptive kids is an easy out. But I don’t believe we’re going that route.
Do some research. Learn something about ADHD. It’s overdiagnosed, but it’s real.
Just remember, DAVE, patience is the key. I’m pretty sure that your boy can be trying from time to time, but just hang in there. It can’t hurt to get a second opinion, either.
Hugs to you and your son, Dave. I’m glad to see that they’re going with a low dose of Ritalin; best to start small and work up if need be. You’re a good man, and your son is blessed to have you for a father. Good luck.
I have (Believe me, I have.) and I know it’s real, and I fully agree that it is over diagnosed. That was the point of my post but I should have explained further.
This teacher was off of her rocker. We had meetings with the principal and we found out that she was saying this to most of the other parents. (The sad this was, other parents were doing as she said.)
I came to the conclusion that she had no patience for kids and felt it would make her job easier to ‘drug’ the kids. (We have had no problems with him this year, and have never had any problems with him at home - Apart from the normal childhood bickering with his sister.)
I just find this a touchy subject because of the huge battle we had with her. No offence was intended to those who have kids who really do have ADHD.
I hope for the best with your son Dave, but definitely get a second opinion.
Gotcha. Sorry if I came off as a little short, but I’m very tired of dealing with people who think that it’s all in my head and I should just try harder. Sorry about your bad experience.
As someone who has a minor case m’self: a few points.
[ul]
[li]Everyone’s different, but for me, the generic Ritalin was worse than nothing. While you’re testing dosages, etc. stick with either the generic or the name brand (more expensive too) stuff. They’re not interchangable and if one doesn’t work, try the other.[/li]
[li]Ritalin is a stimulant. If Li’l Dave (for lack of a name) gets hyper, you may want him rediagnosed. Ritalin is only a focusing agent for hyperactive/ADD/ADHD kids, as far as I know.[/li]
[li]Ritalin (and the generic stuff) can cause upset stomachs for a few weeks. It’ll pass, but it’s not fun.[/li]
[li]There’s a great!!! book called Driven To Distraction that could be very helpful for you. It explained a lot for me![/li]
[/ul]
Again, everyone’s different, but your son may love the fact that he’s not so distractable. I got diag’d as an adult and agonized over whether or not to try the meds. My feeling was that being distractable (and hyper-focusing) was part of who I was. Once I started taking the meds, I was still me, but…more in control. It’s not a magic “focus” pill. What it does is allow me to choose to concentrate. Learning new habits is the hard part. It’s like an appitite supressant: it can’t force you to eat healthy or diet or exercise, but it helps you make better choices.
And it’s not necessarily forever. After about a year, I felt that I could (with my doc’s ok) wean myself off. I’d managed to learn enough new habits that I could function. I’m more distractible now than I was on the medication, but I can control it well enough that I can live with it. Your son may be the same way (and he may not. I dunno…but it’s possible)
One of the real problems you’ll have is that you’ll have toads come along telling you that there’s no such thing (no one in this thread so far, but just wait…:rolleyes:, or it’s all made up or you’re just not willing to teach your son how to behave. The proper response is to punctuate these comments with a pop in the snoot to the person in question :D. Or, if you don’t want assault charges, just an “I don’t care to discuss it.” There’s something about ADD/ADHD that brings opinionated know-nothings out of the woodwork.
ADHD is overdiagnosed, but it’s also real and treatable.
My son was diagnosed as ADHD when he was three years old.
I fought and fought and had second and third and fourth opinions, tried holistic remedies, tried to regulate every single bit of his diet, tried to regulate his day down to the minute.
I am so tired of people saying ‘there’s nothing wrong with the kid’ and ‘boys will be boys’. I know my own child. I also know what is best for him, as do the 8 or 10 medical professionals I have dealt with over the past five years.
He is able to sit still in school, pay attention, and learn. He’s on slow-release Ritalin, which lasts from 8 am until 3 pm, the entirety of his school day. I do not dose him on weekends, because I can handle him well without the drugs.
My very best to you and your family, DAVEW0071. I have been where you are, and I’m doing it all alone with no help from his father. Count your blessings that it isn’t more serious.
You’ll also get the Don’t Drug Your Kids crowd trying to make you feel guilty. I have a four year-old stepson who is a little terror (cute though ). The jury is still out on whether or not he has ADHD, but it’s likely he does have a mild case. All I can say is, do whatever you have to do. If you can get away with not using drugs, then good for you, but if you do need to use them, then use them. Don’t be bullied by the know-alls.
Do you have a pet? That was the first thing the doctor advised us to do for young Benjamin. We bought a cat, and it seems to have helped. It’s given him a focus, and taught him how to care for somebody smaller and more helpless than himself (he’s an only child, and tends to rule the roost).
Thanks, folks. Another good thing to come out of this is to know we’re not alone.
Fenris, I just may take you up on your offer, if any questions do arise. Since you’re an adult who is going through it, you can be sympathetic and more verbal when discussing it. Thanks.
Ginger and LoadedDog, good luck to you and your families. If there’s anything I can do to help (even if it’s being an ear to listen) lemme know, okay?
Snooooopy, I don’t think a TOVA has been done, but we’ll look into it.
Cajun Man and Geobabe, thanks for your kind thoughts. Since I’ve met both of you IRL, I find your wishes especially touching. Love to you both, and I’ll see you in January.
It’s good to be a member around here. You guys are all great.
I have ADD. I started out on Ritalin, but went on Dexedrine because I only had to take that once in the morning. I have a fairly mild case, just bad enough to make it hard to pay attention. I wasn’t diagnosed until I was in high school, and as soon as I went on medication, I could tell a huge difference. I got into a trap of not doing homework just because I didn’t want to, because I got bored with it I just couldn’t stand it. When I started on medication, I was actually able to work on my homework until I got it done! (Of course, I still didn’t want to do it, but who does?) The point is, I think some people over react in both directions. Of course you shouldn’t put your kids on Ritilin (or whatever)“just to make them behave”, but ADD is a real disorder. I hate it when people say ADD is just made up because the parents are lazy. All these medications do is help a person with ADD concentrate. It’s like adjusting the focus on a pair of binoculars so you can see clearly. With cases as mild as mine, nobody will probably notice anything’s different, except you get your work finished and you don’t get jumpy anymore when you have to talk to somebody for more than a couple seconds.
Something else you may wish to look into, as a supplemental treatment: Neurofeedback. It’s like biofeedback, but instead of controlling pulse or breathing, it teaches you to control brain waves. There are numerous types of brain waves, and people with attention problems generally make the wrong amounts of key types of them. Using the neurofeedback, they can learn to rebalance the amount of certain waves their brains produce.
Generally, a therapist teaches the kid to how do it, and then the child practices by using special computer games that can only be “run” by the right kinds of brain waves. The brain eventually learns to balance things out itself. Without drugs. Sounds freaky, eh? But my 9-yr-old niece has been doing this. She went off her medication for the summer and did this instead.
The daughter of a friend of mine was on Ritalin for a few years for ADHD while she was in elementary school. She grew out of it, or something, and no longer needed the medication. She graduated in the top ten per cent of her class.
This can be a very positive thing. Best wishes to you and your son, DAVEW0071.
). The jury is still out on whether or not he has ADHD, but it’s likely he does have a mild case. All I can say is, do whatever you have to do. If you can get away with not using drugs, then good for you, but if you do need to use them, then use them. Don’t be bullied by the know-alls.