My Views, Your Views

My views are always strictly and clinically factual and true; yours are a jumble of wooly, ill-considered opinion, except in those rare instances where they coincide with my own.

I can well afford to be arrogant, for I am always right; my vast intellect and finely-honed methods will invariably lead me to the correct conclusions even in the absence of any tangible facts, whereas your flawed thinking and stumbling practices will usually reach a position that is unsupported by any hard evidence. This is not the same as my reaching conclusions without facts simply because I say it is so. Besides, your methods are different from mine, so how could you possibly be right?

I can see no reason why anyone should think, feel and believe the things that you do, there can therefore be no reason. That you do everything without reason is proof of how foolish you are.

You constantly build your entire worldview on subjective experience and inference; if only you were more like me - relying solely on observation and logic.
From my vantage point, the folly of your ways is patently obvious and yet my wisdom and clarity appear completely absurd in your clouded view - further proof, if any were needed, of the vast gulf between my insight and your ignorance.

Your kind of thinking and behaviour is the kind that ultimately creates conflict and is the root cause of all wars and intolerance and this I cannot abide; if I had my way, I would put a swift end to it, bringing peace and unity by making everybody subject to my views. I am prepared to use force if necessary, and failing that, wipe you and all who think like you from the face of the planet.

Do I make myself clear?

It’s a lonely existence always being right, but I doubt you would understand.

Oh My God! You’re right!

Can’t argue with that! Especially when I read it associating the first-person pronouns with myself and the second-person pronouns with everybody else.

Yup. Makes a lot of sense.

Mangetout, so when DID you meet Mr2U?

Let’s see, this is the Pit right?

So:

(Crude expletive verb, possibly involving a reproductive act) you! Your view are (end product of digestion) compared to my own. Even tough you spend hours contemplating the (same act, this time as a gerund, involving a parental type) universe, your thoughts are nothing compared to my own hastily scribbled views.

Anathema upon your falsely fecund disposition, thou foul purulent festering colubrine counterfeit!

Still having problems with your wife’s green and blue dress dilemma?

DAMN if it doesn’t appear as if Mangetout is able to read my mind. In such a case is it possible to claim plagiarism? :confused: