Yeah, if you mean “Adults having tantrums” or being selfish, or unable to delay gratification, then I’m with you.
But if I can’t flop down in the park with a comic book and a Blue Slurpee with a curly straw, then it’s rubber band guns at twenty paces, tomorrow at dawn, sir!
what is this, some sorta …!!!
No sir! in this town its cap guns at 10 paces high noon in the middle of main street, that or slap leather now yew varmint and draaaaaaawww!
sorry, couldn’t resist, well ok I’m not sorry, but social convention and adulthood and all that, I know my way to the door
forgot my legos
leaving for real now
He’s a gentleman in a wheelchair. I can see someone opening the door and then wanting to hold it open, but somehow not being able to maneuver around, and so getting into an awkward position where the other person needs to enter under the arm.
RE your first paragraph: there are times when I am the unintentional perpetrator in those situations, and I always wave as a gesture of, “Sorry, I screwed up. I wasn’t paying proper attention/didn’t see you. Please forgive my stupidity.”
^ I’ve always thought an item that would sell like hotcakes would be a lighted display (one of those left-to-right scrolling multi-LED dealies) you could mount on your rear deck, that would flash “My Fault,” “Truly Sorry,” “Thanks,” or whatever you would need to program (control your sinister urges) to diffuse a situation.
But then I wake up.
The smell of microwave-reheated twice / thrice cooked fish, especially in an office.
That fragrance will run through your nostrils like a purse snatcher running Parkour.
(Throw that shit out, will ya…? Here’s a buck; buy a hot-pocket & shove that up your hole instead.)
covers the door with the handy NERF Mini-gun
Yes, it’s like they forget there are actual human beings on the other side of the screen. “Oh, it’s just a message board,” they say, “Get over yourself,” but on the other side of the screen are actual people, with feelings and emotions, who can get hurt.
I also get really offended about careless dog owners, who think they are entitled to let their Muffins shit everywhere.
The shills in the mall are pretty goddamn annoying. I don’t even acknowledge them anymore if they call to me. If they get in my face I stare at them, unsmiling, unflinching, as I continue walking at my (pretty fast) pace. If they don’t get out of my way I run them down. They are predatory sellers and I don’t like anyone who makes their business run that way/
Wow, that reminded me of something offensive that I completely forgot about: those text-graphic things that people post on their Facebook or Pinterest accounts that say things like “Never piss off a Taurus,” or “Betray a Leo? Prepare for war!” They’re so common that I’ve concluded that the purpose of astrology is to give people an excuse for being temperamental assholes.
Mon Dieu! Are you talking about people who can leave their kiosks?!
I worked in a kiosk at a shopping mall, right out of high school – Brass ‘N’ Leather. (no, nothing so exciting, it was belts and buckles etc.) I was not allowed to leave the kiosk on pain of death, except for lunch or bathroom breaks. I never called out to or tried to hard-sell anyone. Then again, we were pretty busy most of the time. Belts cut to fit, and all the crazy specialty belt buckles you could imagine. Although it always seemed to me that those hook-type buckles didn’t work as well as actual buckles.
Even at street fairs around here, booth-havers don’t give you a hard time. They just stand and smile and look artistic.
People who say “smile!” when I am walking along minding my own business.
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Yes, I hate that. My facial expression or lack thereof is my choice.
This is a thing that really offends me, but I think it’s kind of unique to the person and maybe you won’t relate.
An older attorney here at work will come and talk to one or the other of my male bosses, and if I’m nearby, he’ll bounce insults aimed at my boss off me. Examples:
“Hey, teela, whaddya think of this little shit you work for?”
“Hey, teela, how about this rice bucket boss you got?” (boss is Asian)
“Hey, teela, can you believe this guy actually married a good-looking woman?”
teela brown: Notice that the people doing this are often the same ones who are making a lame-ass joke that you would never want to be associated with in the first place. I think they do it because they’re chicken to say such classless things on their own, and say them directly to the object of the remark.
It offends me when able-bodied people opt to use the handicap-accessible stall, despite one or more non-accessible stalls being available.
Agreed. If I ever do something boneheaded while I’m driving and I envision someone about to go all road rage on me, the first thing I do is give my best hang dog look, mouth the words “I’m so sorry,” and wave my apology. I never dreamed that anyone could take it another way.
Not seeing that, at least around here. Mostly it is the SUVs that you see giving rise to short tempers.
The police are ridiculously well armed, so that does make some sense.
I’m offended by freaks trying to proselytize their misguided convictions on astrology and numerology. An old friend starting going wierd on the number 23, and this was years before Jim Carrey did!
(acid)
While we’re on the “ology” thing, in the early 90’s Scientology tried to release its spores and established a chapter in the same block where I actually lived. Often walked by and saw that stupid board they had out front with “Free Personality Test Inside!” Like, hey, that sounds intriguing - I wonder what pearls of wisdom some dipshit stranger has to proclaim about my personality! The front of the business was all large windows, like an aerobics studio or car dealership, allowing it to show off a couple tables with desultory book displays and a couple cubicle partitions, and blinking fluorescent lights. Very classy and legit set-up. The huge, sparse room was almost always empty save for the odd transient type, often with knapsacks and personal effects, sitting at a table, most likely filling out one of those stupid personality tests, foisted on them by a woman who often loitered outside with flyers, and usually wore a thin white cotton dress that didn’t really cover up what was underneath.
After about ten years they realised their racket couldn’t get any traction, and vamoosed.
Brutalist architecture.
The revival of truly dire '80s and '90s fashion elements.
Unauthorized [del]cinnamon[/del] cilantro.
Seriously? You people find these things offensive?
I can understand finding them annoying, but offensive? They are not offensive in the sense that they do not personally offend YOU as a person. They are just stupid and annoying! But hey, that’s life!
One of the biggest problems we have in this politically correct world is people being too fast to take offense to things that have no bearing on them. The phrase “suck it up, buttercup” suggests itself. Not that I would ever use that phrase, for fear of giving offense. 
