Hi,
Is there a name for a situation like this?
“I really wish that Jimi Hendrix had lived longer, so he could have created more music.”
“It really sickens me that you are so selfish rather than feel for his family!”
Is this just people being asses or is there a name for this rhetorical device?
False dilemma (you don’t actually have to choose between wanting more of his music and feeling sympathy for his family)
Also (in this case): appeal to emotion.
It probably falls under a few other categories too - such as fallacy of distraction - it may just be a nonsequitur.
Yeah, Mangetout got it.
Brilliant, thank you!
The Mutually Exclusive Fallacy- fallaciously assuming two or more things are mutually exclusive.
Okay, I just made that up.
That’s what the False Dilemma fallacy is.
False dilemma fallacy is not a good name though; sounds too broad.
It’s not broad, relllly. A dilemma is a situation where there are exactly two choices. Sometimes it’s called a dichotomy. It’s a false dilemma if people are pretending there are only two choices when there really are more.
I want to point out that both dilemmas and appeals to emotion can be perfectly legitimate tools or argumentation. They are fallacies only when they are false, or in the case of appeals to emotion, irrelevant.
Opinions differ on that.
(You say it isn’t. Everybody else says it is.)
From the Greek:
di-: twice
lemma: premise
two (opposing) premises. Dilemma. False, because there are actually more than two choices.
False dilemma. Some people aren’t sure. 
I always heard “dichotomy” more often then “dilemma” for this.
Dilemma may literally mean 2 choices, but it doesn’t convey it in my personal vernacular: rightly or wrongly, I more often hear it as a substitute for ‘problem’: “We have a dilemma here”, “we are in a dilemma”. IMO, dichotomy conveys a much stronger notion of polar opposites (false or not).
What he said.
Dilemma in its original Latin did indeed mean two premises, but due to semantic drift has come to refer to any problem.
Hoist with my own petard!
Its also called politics. Its politics because there was a hidden meaning
which is “SHUT UP ABOUT A STUPID SICK TOPIC” ! ???
Well ok, is it is sick ? but anyway, a whatif about if someone was still alive ?
what can you do after the fact ?
So in case no one else said it, the phrase comes from “political correctness”.
It sounds bad to say “its pointless to talk about what a dead person might have done”,because family, and “true believes” , may be feeling that that the person would SURELY have done “GREAT THINGS”…
So that response of “consider the family” is a political correctness saying… part of the modern idiom.