Names that became unusable, like Kermit

[AHunter3]

@What Exit?

I must know, how many years have you waited to use that?
I knew what it was building towards and still laughed at the punchline. Excellent job.

Jim

I collect 'em. I’ve gpt a girlfriend who has trouble getting to sleep at nights, no matter what else, wants a “story”. These are my “stories”. She throws a pillow or two my way, scows, and then is able to sleep.

I don’t invent 'em but I do work a bit on the delivery

[Nava]

Sancho.

While el Quijote is a great book and all, it sucks that if I ever name a son or godson after two of my favourite historical figures (Sancho III and Sancho VII of Navarra), he’d hear no end of the fatso jokes from people who can’t be bothered go beyond the caricature.

[Martini_Enfield]

@Nava

Sancho.

While el Quijote is a great book and all, it sucks that if I ever name a son or godson after two of my favourite historical figures (Sancho III and Sancho VII of Navarra), he’d hear no end of the fatso jokes from people who can’t be bothered go beyond the caricature.

You should get him to watch Orgazmo when he’s older, too… for another great Cinematic character named “Sancho”.

[Martini_Enfield]

@AHunter3

Well, Kermit is not quite as retired as you might think In fact, I was hanging out at the savings and loan the other day when a short fellow with visible webbing betweenst his fingers came in and went to the Customer Service desk. I knew the fellow occupying the desk, a wacky Irishman named Paddy O’Sullivan, MBA and lots of serious attentive service behind yon desk, don’t get me wrong, but a little nutso in his private life for which we dubbed him Paddy-wack, dig? So little Mr. short-n-webby comes in and says he wants to borrow 85K short-term at reasonable interest rates (which I am overhearing only because I happen to be nearby and they aren’t whispering, I don’t eavesdropl, hey?). Paddy, he asks the usual form-filling stuff, and he of the webbed appendage, he says his name is Kermit, OK? Kermit Jagger to be precise. And ol’ Wack, he notes that down. Address. City. Next of kin? Now get this: yeah, it’s that Jagger, can you believe it? This amphibious fellow is ol’ Mick’s kid. Now Paddy, he’s a Mick, he’s got kids, and you know he digs Wild Horses, I mean who wouldn’t? So all is cool, until like he has to ask for some collateral for the 8 point 5, I mean that’s his job, right? Well, looking kinda green…actually he always did, come to think of it, but looking kind of amphibiously ambivalent or even a little hopped off, this Kermit Jagger fella comes forth with this little carved trinket, and thunks it on the counter and acts like that ought to settle things once and for all. So I’m watching and Patso does the office-intercom thing, buzzes the supe, you know? And this tall surly dude comes in and takes a look at the forms and the little carved whatsit, and he says in considerable annoyance “It’s a knick-knack, Paddy-Wack, give the frog a loan! His old man’s a Rolling Stone!”

yeah, well if you already heard it, what you doing reading this far, huh?

The joke didn’t make any sense at first because the rhyme I knew as a kid went:

“Knick-Knack, Paddywhack, Give the dog a bone, This old man came rolling home”

[Ranchoth]

“Igor.”

Sorry, Mister Sikorsky.

[Aspidistra]

@Happy Lendervedder

I know a couple of Rons, but I imagine Ronald McDonald and Ron Burgandy may have ruined the name, or at least ruined the childhood of those so named.

I know a Ronald McDonald. He’s around 40 I think. He is also a deeply disturbed individual.

[Baker]

I know twin brothers named Ronald and Donald. But they’re just my age(I’m not quite 52) and so they were named before the McDonald’s mascot became such an icon.

[rinni]

@Ranchoth

“Igor.”

Sorry, Mister Sikorsky.

I used to think this too, but my boyfriend says it’s a common name where he’s from (Bosnia). I don’t know exactly what he means by “common”, but that’s his brother’s name.

Not a name, but this thread reminded me of the comedian - blanking on who it was now - who said that Hitler ruined that moustache style for everyone.

[Beware_of_Doug]

@Aspidistra

I know a Ronald McDonald…

I was surprised to glance at my train conductor’s ID badge the other day and he, too, bore the McMoniker.

My first thought was, I wonder if they registered him at birth to get free coupons.

[biqu]

@Diogenes the Cynic

I once knew a kid named Linus. People were always asking him where his blanket was. He didn’t think it was funny, like, at all.

If you and Linus were kids nowadays, maybe his peers would be asking him for the release schedule of the next kernel update.

[Nava]

@Martini Enfield

You should get him to watch Orgazmo when he’s older, too… for another great Cinematic character named “Sancho”.

uncrosses her eyes and makes a note in her videoclub list

[Only_Mostly_Dead]

Hello. My name is Clifford. What used to be the 63rd most popular boy’s name in the 1920s (so says the Baby Name Wizard) is now a big, red, cartoon dog. Being called a dog all the time is not great for a child’s self-esteem. Kids can be so cruel.

Hell, I was only named Clifford in 1982 because of inertia (Hello, my name is Clifford IV). No way I’m subjecting any kid of mine to that.

[Sarahfeena]

@rinni

I used to think this too, but my boyfriend says it’s a common name where he’s from (Bosnia). I don’t know exactly what he means by “common”, but that’s his brother’s name.

Not a name, but this thread reminded me of the comedian - blanking on who it was now - who said that Hitler ruined that moustache style for everyone.

I was at a local business once that had old family portraits hanging, and a couple of the men have those little moustaches. It is…startling, to say the least.

[Annie-Xmas]

I image anyone looking at a current list of popular baby names would have to wonder…

Where’s Waldo?

[RealityChuck]

@AskNott

Some folks now alive might think that Kermit The Frog (same middle name as Jack The Ripper) was around since the beginning of time. Not so. When I first learned that President Teddy Roosevelt had a son named Kermit, it was the first Kermit I had ever heard of. “What an odd name,” I thought. Kermit The Frog was not even Kermit The Tadpole at that point. I still have never met anyone named Kermit, neither frog nor human.

What? You never heard of Kermit Zarley, the greatest name* in golf?

*Not the greatest golfer, of course, but the greatest name.

[Only_Mostly_Dead]

@RealityChuck

What? You never heard of Kermit Zarley, the greatest name* in golf?

*Not the greatest golfer, of course, but the greatest name.

Zarley has some stiff competition for Greatest Name.

Fuzzy Zoeller.
Fred Funk (for the alliterative) (Go Terps).
Jesper Parnevik.
Seve Ballesteros.
Retief Goosen.

My vote for coolest name: Rocco Mediate.

And one of the greatest golfers also has one of the greatest names: Tiger Woods. His name’s an aggressive, predatory animal and a club type (not to mention where us duffers end up too many times a round). Very great name.

[El_Perro_Fumando]

I know a Kermit. My high school biology teacher was so named before the frog came along and he got perpetually teased by his students for it. (Walking down the hallway, he’d just hear “Ribbit” following him). He pretended to hate the association, but he always drove a green car with a vanity license plate which said, you guessed it, RIBBIT.

[Ethilrist]

@Only Mostly Dead

Hello. My name is Clifford. What used to be the 63rd most popular boy’s name in the 1920s (so says the Baby Name Wizard) is now a big, red, cartoon dog. Being called a dog all the time is not great for a child’s self-esteem. Kids can be so cruel.

Hell, I was only named Clifford in 1982 because of inertia (Hello, my name is Clifford IV). No way I’m subjecting any kid of mine to that.

So, probably not too many Scooby Doo’s out there in the world, either.

I haven’t met or heard of any Raquels except for Ms. Welch. Lot to live up to with that name, I reckon.

Likewise Hannibal. I hear Jason took a serious downturn in popularity back in the 80’s.

[h.sapiens]

@Only Mostly Dead

Hello. My name is Clifford. What used to be the 63rd most popular boy’s name in the 1920s (so says the Baby Name Wizard) is now a big, red, cartoon dog. Being called a dog all the time is not great for a child’s self-esteem. Kids can be so cruel.

Hell, I was only named Clifford in 1982 because of inertia (Hello, my name is Clifford IV). No way I’m subjecting any kid of mine to that.

I’d rather be compared to a big red dog than to Cliff Claven any day.

[Eleanor_of_Aquitaine]

I used to work with a man named Kermit - he’d be in his 30s now. And my husband’s second cousin is married to a man named Elvis, who is also in his 30’s.

My co-worker from Taiwan, who has lived in the states for 15 years, wanted to name her new baby Alvin but was talked out of it - apparently the Chipmunks ruined that name.

I wanted to name one of my sons Peter, because I’ve always loved that name, but I was talked out of it (Peter Pan, Peter-pumpkin-eater, etc.).