Nasty Practical Jokes for fun or revenge.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
21

My senior year of high school, I took AP Physics C. This class occurred right at the same time as AP Physics B, in the room next door, so something of a rivalry sprung up. Anyway, one day, the Physics B kids tied our doors shut while we were in class. So, by way of revenge, our teacher got us together during lunch, sent two guys out to Radio Shack to buy piezoelectric tweeters, got a frequency generator from the storeroom, drilled a hole into the ventilation duct, and had us run wires through the duct into their room and hook up the speakers. The other end of the wire we hooked to the frequency generator, set to some obnoxious high frequency. We then waited. Lunch ended, and the Physics B kids started showing up. So far, so good. Then, somebody noticed the ceiling tiles we had left ajar for maximum effect. They looked inside and saw the speakers. We had to act fast. We flipped the switch, and… “TWEEET-A-TWEEET-A-TWEEET!” The room was filled with the most irritating sound I had ever heard. I was standing out in the hall, and it still made me want to cringe. Needless to say, the occupants of the classroom were in a hurry to get out. So, we held the doors shut. Finally, we decided they’d had enough, and turned the sound off. They never pranked us again.

Here lies Pierre de Fermat. Unfortunately, there is not enough room on this tombstone for a proper epitaph.

22

Got milk?

Milk poured behind a baseboard heater or in a heating supply duct will begin to totally REEK after about a week.It is hard to find the cause of the smell…impossible to clean…hard to cover with deoderants and lasts a good month.

Rich “G7SUBS”

23

When I was in the Army in Germany, I told a new guy that in order to keep the fuel tank on his new hummer from freezing, he had to pour a gallon of anti-freeze in when he refueled it. The motor sergeant almost had a heart attack when he saw this private pouring anti-freeze into a brand new hummer.

24

[Hijacker Hat ON]

John Corrado: I vividly remember Farrel’s. I think they’re defunct now, but man, that was the place to go for your birthday.

[Hijacker Hat OFF]

25

I, too, was a Farrell’s kinda kid. {SIGH}

There is at least one left, in the Mira Mesa suburbs of San Diego, California. My understanding is that there are still a few out there. The one here in the suburbs of Philadelphia closed in the late 80’s.

Esprix

Evidently, I rock.
Ask the Gay Guy!

26

Ummm…guess I should have said I told him to pour the anti-freeze into the GAS TANK. duh. :slight_smile:

27

For weeks our house was haunted by a phantom beeping. At first we all thought it was a cricket, but it was clearly very synthetic sounding, so then we thought it was a misplaced pager giving a “low battery” signal, but that didn’t explain why sometimes it was in the garage, sometimes the kitchen, sometimes the entry. It drove us crazy for weeks.

So, weeks later, I discover one of the house mates, baseball bat in hand, tearing apart the bathroom medicine cabinet.

“I’ve got the damn thing cornered this time!” she says.

Ever seen these key chains which, if you can’t find your keys, you clap twice and the key chain emits a little chirp, telling you where it is? Well, a friend of mine bought a gaggle of these things at the flea market and hid them very cleverly all around the house. Taped under drawers, inside an unused tea kettle, behind a mirror. Every once in a while a slamming door or noisily closed drawer or banged cabinet will trigger one of them.

Well, once we discovered the one in the Band-Aid box it didn’t take but ten minutes to wrangle the rest of them.

The culprit came over for movie night and plunked down on the sofa, grabbing the bowel of popcorn. Two brisk claps set off the seven keychains inside the popcorn bowl, the jig was up.

Retaliation is forthcoming.

28

In H.S. we used to prank each other a lot, sometimes there were a few good ones, sometimes not. The worst I got was a duct-taped car…My friends laid notebook paper down on the paint and wrapped about 6 roll’s of tape completely around my car, covering handles, locks, everything…It must have taken me 15 minutes to saw through the tape with my keys. My three best car ones I gave were: 1)Cooking a super-saturated sugar candy mixture (any hard-candy recipe will do) colored red, I let the mixture cool down to a warm-temp (otherwise it could cause permanent cracks) then went and coated the windshield of my friends car with it using a spatula. Presto! Instant Jolly-Rancher candy windshield. 2) An un-lubricated condom (important! otherwise the lubrication dries and it won’t work) unrolled will wrap around hollow hood ornaments (Mercedes Benz, Old Caddies)…They get in and drive, and wind inflates the condom. Short-lived but funny. 3) This works best if you can get into someones car, or if they have a car that you can lift the hood on (especially someone who knows NOTHING about cars). Buy an old important looking part to a car from a junk-yard ($5 Starter, fuel pump). Pop the hood and disconect the battery or pull the central plug cable or ??? Close the hood, then put paper down on the hood (be nice- don’t scratch the paint!) put the old (useless) part on with a few screws, etc. Maybe add a screwdriver or something. Add a note to call you if they have any problems putting it back together or something (or don’t! Write a nasty one if ya want). They get in, try and start the car, it doesn’t start (because of the pulled battery cable or ???) and they freak! They’ll spend forever looking for where you took this (useless) part from, but probably won’t notice the real reason the car won’t start.

A good, not too bad, one for getting the boss: Pop a whole bunch of popcorn- two shopping bags at least, if not more (or buy two/three of those huge bags of popcorn that they sell at Target, K-mart, etc). Take about 6 or so sheets of newspaper and put sticky-tack/press-tack or tape or??? on the four corners. When the boss goes into their office and shuts the door (hopefully one without a window that opens INTO the office- most do) get help and put a sheet a paper on the frame at the bottom, pressing the tacky stuff/tape on the frame. There should be about 4 to 6 inches of space between the door and paper- fill this with popcorn. Add the next sheet of paper above that and continue filling. Do this one sheet at a time (overlapping a little) because pouring popcorn in from the top can get noisy. Fill up the space all the way to the top of the door then leave. Maybe have someone call them to keep them occupied or something. When they finally open the door, a wall of popcorn falls on them…Harmless, but funny. Takes about 10 minutes to clean up with a broom and vacuum. You can do this to a normal house front door too late at night…
Other door ones:
Fill a small/medium paper bag with shaving cream- slip the end under a door frame, jump on it- first few feet of the room get coated.

Yes, this works, no, its not just a movie prank- but watch out for pranks with fire! A friend almost went to jail with this one (the bush in front of the house caught on fire). Fill a lunch paper bag half full of (fresh)dog shit, put it in front of a door, light the top on fire and ring/knock- RUN! They come out, see a bag burning, and stomp on it. Shoes get covered with shit and burning shit doesn’t smell too great either.

I have more, but this is too long already.

I have so many thoughts going through my head that sometimes it’s hard to finish a

29

Re: Killing grass in rude phrases.

The grass will grow back in a few months.
Fertilize the grass enough, and it will be greener for years. Heh Heh.

30

Proudest Monkey:

I have a friend who did the old sign-your-enemy-up-for-every-magazine-under-the-sun routine. Unfortunately, she used postcards from her own magazine subscriptions, as well as postcards stolen from magazines in drug stores etc. Anyway, she got a not so nice phone call from the Office of the Postal Inspector telling her she was under investigation for mail fraud or something or other. Nothing came of it, but the lesson is to make sure you don’t use postcards from your own subscriptions–apparently they have some sort of code on them so you can be tracked down.

31

In military school, one popular prank (to be used only against the truly odious) was the cocoa bomb. Take a large can of unsweetened baker’s cocoa powder and dump it into Kleenex or other fragile container. Lob through odious person’s door, ten minutes before inspection. In case you’ve never spilled any, cocoa powder is IMPOSSIBLE to sweep up completely…it’s too fine. All you can do is sweep up as much as you can, then break out the mops or wet rags…at which point it turns into chocolate syrup and is even harder to get up.

Live a Lush Life
Da Chef

32

Well, there was this toilet just sitting down at a building near my neighborhood, see? I had always planned to put it in someone’s yard. Then for added effect, put lighter fluid in the bowl and light it. Think of what the person would think when they saw a flaming toilet at 3 in the morning in their yard. Or if you wanted to be really evil, you could cut their brake cables. But that could have unintended consequences…

“I know you’ve come to kill me. Shoot, coward, you’re only going to kill a man.”  -Che Guevara, Oct 9, 1967.

33

Sorry to hijack again, but I too was a Farrell’s kid. I really loved their huge lollipops, not to mention their ice cream.

Rather, I was in the position of a spore which, having finally accepted its destiny as a fungus, still wonders if it might produce penicillin.
–Ayi Kwei Armah

34

[ul][li]Go to your local U.S. Post Office and fill-out a change of address form for desired victim. They don’t ask for ID; You just fill out a little card and put it in the mail box. Uncle Sam does the rest.[/li][li]When using any public restroom, scribble the desired victim’s name & number on the wall. Preferably at eye level by the urinals, and mention something like Into Groups.[/li][li]Visit your local Border’s Book Shop, or Barnes & Nobles, or the like. Go to the magazine rack and remove a subscription card from each of the periodicals. Twenty or more is a good amount. Subscribe desired victim to the magazines, and be sure to check mark bill me later.[/li][li]If you work with the victim, try to make lots of long distance calls from their phone extension. Call lots of 1-900 numbers, if possible.[/li][li]If your victim is married, get someone of the opposite sex to phone their home number and when spouse answers, yell "Who the hell are you??!! (S)He didn’t tell me/lihe was married. OH MY GOD!!" and slam down the phone.
[li]If victim has call-waiting, then call them a lot.[/li][li]Call the victim’s answering machine and speak as if the device is malfunctioning;[/li]slow tape, fast tape, etc…[/ul]

35

Forgot to mention the following:

[ul]Get two foil ketchup packets, determine which toilet victim will likely use (this works well at place of employment), lift toilet lid, place ketchup packets on bowl, carefully place lid back down. They must be positioned so that the little knobs on the underside of the lid come to rest on top of the packets. Victim sits atop the trap and SPLAT.[/ul]

36

http://www.dogdoo.com

I refuse to say anymore.

“Ayesha, Who can bend minds with her spoon” sig. by WallyM7 profile by UncleBeer, thanks guys.

Voted SDMB Biggest Flirt (Female) and Least Shy

37

Just like you guys, I was a Farrel’s kid. There is also one left in Los Gatos, right downtown.

One of the few left besides a few in the southland.

38

One of my former worknmates was notorious for his practical jokes, most of which were simple but sweetly timed.

One of his best ones was done at the ambulance station where I work. He used to get hold of an old ambulance siren, that sounded very similar to the air-raid sirens used during WW2 during the Blitz. The siren was connected to a small 6 volt battery, which was sufficient to make the required noise in a confined space.

He would hide the siren in the women’s toilet, and run a pair of wires up under the seat. The bared ends would be held apart with a small piece of sponge, allowing the circuit to be completed when the seat was sat upon.

You can imagine the effect that was created, and the hilarity to those who waited in anticipation.

The trick backfired one day, when its intended target was tipped off as to what was going to happen. Another staff member skilled in casualty simulation made her up with fake blood and a large “laceration” across her forehead. At the appropriate time, she slipped into the toilet without being seen and leaned on the seat, yelled out, kicked the door and stumbled convincingly out into the adjacent passageway.

My workmate was taken aback and became very concerned for her wellbeing, as well as very apologetic for causing her injury. We let him carry on his treatment right up to loading her into the ambulance before we pissed ourselves laughing.

Suffice to say, the siren was instantly retired, never to be heard from again.

Knock softly but firmly, 'cause I like soft firm knockers…

39

Be your own puppet. It’ easy, and you can always deny it.

40

That would never work, would it???