First some background - I just started a new job at the end of August. I am still in my three months probationary period and the job is a term for a year. I am trying hard to make a good impression. So far I have been doing well, except for one small thing -
My daughter is in daycare for the first time ever, and loves it. The only problem she has been sick for two and a half weeks, off and on. I have missed 3.5 days of work and they have already docked me for 2.5 of them. Last week I had to take her on Thursday to the ER for a screaming earache in the middle of the night. That cost another half day. I could’ve gotten up and gone to work, but it seemed unfair to drag a three year old out of bed after three hours sleep.
She just finished her antibiotics this morning and seemed totally fine. I dropped her off and went to work.
At 9:30 I get a call - her fever spiked at snack time to 104. CRAP! I left work and pick her up. I take her to her pediatrician who checks her out but says that he isn’t sure what it is yet but “Something is brewing for sure.” Could be flu, could be chicken pox, we won’t know for a few hours (or days if it’s the Pox). I had just scheduled her vaccination too
SIGH.
I do not feel badly in the least that I have made my child a priority. I knew that when I got pregnant that my baby would always be first, but I know that I am going to get fired from this job very soon. I don’t blame them; they hired me to have someone doing the job, not sitting at home. They are nice people, but how much can they put up with?
It’s just so hard; we were finally getting ahead, thinking about a house next year in a safe neighborhood, I am so bummed out.
I don’t know what to do. I was hoping her fever would stay down, that maybe it was a one time thing, but yet again an hour ago she started complaining that her ear hurts (when her fever went up her she would complain her ear hurts).
Anyone need a stay at home mom to do some envelop stuffing or something else for BIG BUCKS?
There’s nothing you can or should do, as far as your baby’s health is concerned. Getting new infections when she mixes with new people is completely normal and good for her immune system.
Talk to your boss or HR people and explain the situation; tell them this is not normal for you, and will pass when she gets over this phase (probably 2-3 months). Maybe you could make some offer to make up for time you miss, or work from home for them, rather than losing pay if possible.
The good news is you are almost certain to pick up something new from her too
Awww, Poysyn, you have my utmost sympathy. It is a shit of a thing to have to juggle your job expectations with caring for a sick child. Unfortunately, it is also a reality for mothers the world over…and no matter what people say about how much better it is nowadays for working mums, when it comes down to the crunch, most employers will ditch you in favour of someone who has less ‘baggage’ to contend with.
Are you kidding Askance? Two-three months?? Kids get sick with remarkable regularity right through childhood (and always at the most inconvenient times), and unfortunately this situation WILL be the norm for Poysyn until her kidlet is old enough to stay home crook by him/herself…around the age of 14 or 15 I’ve discovered…and then only if it something minor. I’m guessing here there is no extended family or friends to fall back on.
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Poysyn**, chin up, look after your baby, and everything else WILL fall into place eventually. I think your idea of a home-based career is a good one. When my tackers were littlies, I did ‘casual’ work that only necessitated that I get the work ‘done’…it didn’t matter when. So if the sprogs were sick, I could defer it for a later date. Ideal, but it meant many years of borderline poverty I must admit.
The “big hit” should only last a few months. Kids get sick all the time, but the “first time in daycare” sick is constant and hard compared to normal little kid colds. Don’t scare Poysyn to death. It does get better. And yes, they will be snotnosed germ machines for the next ten years, but you won’t be calling out from work once or twice a week for that long. At my work when someone starts missing a lot of work one of the first things we ask is “new daycare/school?” It’s just a given when a coworker has a kid new in daycare that they will miss while thier kid gets used to the new germs. Hopefully your workplace will be as sympathetic.
Both of mine got ear infections constantly. Love the tubes. Baby boy is about to be 2 and hasn’t had one since the tubes went in.
Some kids just get sick more than others. But think about her diet, does she drink fruit juices (real fruit juice, not High-C or something) instead of soda or kool-aid. Especially orange juice, my daughter loves the stuff and I’m convinced that’s part of the reason she was rarely sick. Also, lots of fruits and veggies can keep them healthy and boost their immune system. And have them wash their hands often.
Do you have anyone that can spell you for the next couple months and pick her up and watch her when she’s sick? I know she’d prefer to be with you, but if there’s a grandparent or aunt or uncle who could watch her, that would ease things up for you. Frankly, I don’t know your marital/relationship status, but can her father share in this job?
Okay, she does eat very well, lots of fruits and veggies and vitamins too. As for someone else that can watch her, not really. Everyone works. Hubby has taken a few days here and there but quite frankly his job pays the rent, so if we are going to jeopardize a job, it will be mine.
Not at all. As ShelliBean kindly clarified, I’m talking about this kind of constant illness, where it seems like something new happens every second day. There will be occasional others of course, especially if someone else new joins the daycare centre, but the worst should be over in the time I mentioned. I know whereof I speak.
I second the idea about talking to your HR person or your boss. This first-time-in-daycare syndrome is quite normal and fairly well-known and it only lasts a few months–although they are kind of miserable months for the kid.
I had the kind of day-care where I had to pay for a full week if the little guy showed up for any part of the week, but I did NOT get paid if I missed work (because I had no accumulated sick or vacation time to use). So what with paying full price for daycare but taking a lot of unpaid days off, one week I grossed $8. This clued me in that maybe it wasn’t time for me to go back to work just yet, so I quit. Tried again in a year and no problems whatsoever.
