I just wanted to say that I’d advise against this. You show up with earplugs on my doorstep, and you had better be prepared to get them back the hard way.
As for the rest…I agree that 5 hours is way to long to practice, whatever the frequency, and that you may not be the best judge of what constitutes ‘loud’ in this instance, if only because you’re used to the noise, and expect it to happen.
I like the quiet of my neighborhood, and understand your neighbors’ complaint. And as someone in stage/ music production, I have had my cup full of garage bands, so I can easily see how someone might be upset at the noise.
Evidently, I’m the only Doper who is surprised that,
a) The OP hasn’t thought to take some simple soundproofing measures. I would donate some old blankies and foam egg crate thingys to “the band” with the caveat that they have to put up and take down soundproofing themselves before and after each practice. I would NOT notify the neighbors of upcoming practices, if the soundproofing measures work.
b) That any one thing can hold the attention of a teenager for 5 straight hours! I’m impressed. Somebody give that kid some practice space!
Quick question for everyone who says being able to hear the band at all is completely unacceptable: If the neighbors wind up with one of those babies with a shriek like an ice-pick going through your eardrum (and we’ve all heard 'em) and the OP can hear said shrieking in his house, is he then justified in calling the cops about the noise if they can’t get it to stop? It’s outside noise and therefore completely unacceptable, after all.
My neighbor two houses down is in a band that comes over to his house regularly to practice in the basement.
I found this out after we had been living here for three years.
Is there any chance the band could meet downstairs (assuming you have a basement)? That’s going to cut a huge amount of the sound right off the bat. If the basement is unfinished, that’ll actually make it easier to soundproof the ceiling. And, you can put extra-thick padding under the carpet in the room directly overhead, which will also cut the sound drastically (this is what my neighbor has done; I can barely hear his band when I walk by on the street).
re: your pregnant neighbor; something I haven’t seen pointed out above is that if she’s trying to sleep, pretty much by definition it’s quiet as a tomb in her house, and any noise is going to sound like jackhammers.
I would recommend the suggestions people have made to deaden the room and instruments some, see if you can move the band & (especially) the drum set to the basement (actually, if you have a soundproof room that’s too small for the band, you’ll probably want to move the drum set in there so your son can practice without the rest of the band there without annoying the neighbors), and another idea: Go to the pregnant lady and see if she has any environmental music she can play to provide a little white noise to wash out the background sounds, whether it’s the band, a bunch of kids having a super-soaker fight, or cars on the street.
Good lord, people, learn to read all the words. The question was directed at those who felt hearing the band at all, at any volume was completely unacceptable. The question was not, “What if their baby is as loud as a rock band?” The question was where you draw the line about hearing other people’s noise in your home. If hearing the band, ever, at all, under any circumstances is completely unacceptable, then hearing the baby, ever, at all, under any circumstances would seem to be completely unacceptable.
(As a side note, my mother swears that my older brother shrieked at the top of his lungs for seven hours straight every single day for over a month when he was an infant. It would apparently get to the point where she would have to leave him in his crib and go sit on the porch and cry for a while. Given that he’s been a bellower all the time I’ve known him, I can believe it.)
The band practice wouldn’t bother me. In my old neighborhood, I could regularly hear one neighbor practicing his guitar and another neighbor’s kid practicing the trumpet. Five hours of drum practice does seem a bit excessive, though.
I try to cultivate a “live and let live” attitude with my neighbors. As someone else wrote, if you want complete peace and quiet, don’t live in the city or the burbs. I live in a traditionally blue-collar neighborhood, though, and I suspect my neighbors and I are far more relaxed about noise than folks in expensive housing developments.
to all the grammer checkers -I’m a :wally
should be “listen to a screamer” - some how the kids have sucked the juices right out of my brain, lord help us all.
I was going to post about this earlier, but was overcome by a bout of sloth
I had a friend who was was deep into playing and recording electronica. Circumstances led her to move into her aunt’s home. So as not to bother her aunt and grandmother while playing and mixing, my friend effectively soundproofed her room by hanging thick quilted blankets over all the wallspace. It worked pretty well.
Maintaining good neighbor relationships (assuming they aren’t unreasonable twits, and so far, they don’t sound like it) is more important than full-volume practices.
I agree with other posters who recommend that put yourself in their shoes figuratively (hmm, new neighbor making a ton of noise (to them) and not stopping - could be tough) and literally (go to their house and listen next practice - if you can hear it reasonably clearly, they have a basis for complaint)
There is LOTS of room for compromise - e.g., more soundproofing, a general turn-down in volume, etc, agreeing to play on the louder side for a shorter period of time, etc. Think about what you CAN to do be a good neighbor.
As a longtime player in a band, I offer this observation - bands sound MUCH better if some of their practices are acoustic - even hardcore or metal bands. It forces them to focus on “the lock” - locking in on rhythm parts and changes that get hidden by the slush of distortion. I always start rehearsals with new bandmembers by working on songs acoustically - just did one this weekend. Maybe the rehearsals at your house can be unplugged for all the right reasons and be easier on your neighbor’s ears…
Best of luck - it seems like cooler reasonable minds can make this work. Now, go bring your neighbor’s wife a Congrats present for her pregancy and make it clear you want to be a good neighbor and work things out…
I know all about this situation, from the bands perspective. Sometimes there are things you can do, and sometimes you’re just screwed.
One of the things that we did that worked is wrote a letter to all the surrounding neighbors letting them know about our “positive minded youth activities” and letting them know some proposed times (i.e. Saturdays from 1-4) that we would like to engage in our horrible racket. This not only opens a dialogue with the neighbors so that they feel free to contact you instead of the cops, but makes you and the band look like good guys for trying. Some of the responses we got were a little chilly, but some garnered us all sorts of help and equipment from people around the neighborhood too. One guy turned out to be an acoustical engineer and he totally soundproofed the basement and helped us not sound so horrible when we played.
OTOH, sometimes you’re just not going to be able to practice there anymore. There was a set of neighbors who went to extremes to make it hard for us. They would call the cops and make things up that we were smoking pot in the driveway (not even close) and that we had threatened them. This instance we ended up finding a rehearsal space for $100 a month and we could rock out as loud as we wanted for 6 hours a week.
After posting I also want to strongly agree with the WordMan about the acoustic practice. If it sounds good acoustic (no matter what the style) it will sound freakin awesome plugged in.
I’ve worked nights. It would be great if I could ask all my neighbors to not disturb my sleep between the hours of 8 AM and 4 PM. But I can’t. People have a right to make reasonable amounts of noise during reasonable hours. The OP seems reasonable to me.
A big yes! about the crying and screaming babies. I very rarely get headaches. But crying and screaming babies and very young children are the one thing that can and does cause me headaches. My neighbor has her granddaughter over every weekend on a Saturday or a Sunday, and the girl spends at least a full hour running around screaming at, or about, everything. I would gladly have a band practicing next door every weekend than that little girl, even once a month.
But I just don’t feel my personal needs supersede my neighbor’s right to have her granddaughter over, or this little girl’s need to scream her bloody head off.
Now someone up-thread said it would be unbelievably rude to knock on someone’s door and ask them to not nap. Phrased like that, I suppose it would seem rude. But how is that different than giving your neighbors advance notice you’re going to have band practice? Or be doing some construction? Or be throwing a party? Or having a child that’s going to spend the next ten years crying and screaming? You are essentially saying, “don’t plan on napping.”
To those who think moving to a nice suburban neighborhood is a guarantee of peace & quite, I call baloney. If you want guaranteed quiet, you should soundproof your own home, not expect your neighbors to soundproof theirs.
levdrakon - you’re comment that the neighbors should sound-proof their home against unwanted noise is nonsensical. It reminds me of the time our neighbor’s dog got loose and attacked my dog in our yard. My parent’s comlained and the neighbors said we should fence in our yard if we didn’t want their (vicious, already had bitten three people) dog in our yard.
I don’t expect my neighbors all to be as silent as the grave, however, I do expect my solitude not to be unduly trepassed upon. So 5 hours of drumming would be out. A rock band playing at full volume, even once a month, for more than an hour would be out. Kids playing in their yards, lawnmowers at reasonable time, the occassional backyard party, the assorted noises of everyday living - those are all fine.
I reiterate what others have said - do your best to soundproof the area in which they play and then go to the neighbor’s house and listen from there. My opinion is, if you were in an apartment building and would complain to the management about it, then they shouldn’t have to listen to it. Hopefully you’ll live in your neighborhood for years - long after the step-son is out of the house. Having good relationships with your neighbors can make the difference between enjoying your largest investment (your home) and regretting it.
Thanks to everyone for their responses. I’ve gone to speak to my neighbor today and I’m glad I did. We had a nice long talk and it turns out he is not the one who called the police. In fact, he told me something I didnt’ know. We left on Saturday afternoon for about an hour while leaving the band to practice. Apparently, they cranked it up full blast when we were gone. Something the son failed to tell us. Anyway, it’s all come to a peaceful resolution. My partners ex-wife said tonite when she picked up the drum set and loaded it in their van that “this is the last time I’m hauling this thing back and forth”. So, it appears that there will be no more drumming at my house, much to my neighbors joy. It WAS a bitch packing up the drums and hauling them around. So, it looks like the band will be practicing at the ex-wifes house and one other band members house (he has drums too) from now on. I’m glad, because I don’t want to be on anyones bad side. There will still be some electric guitar playing at my house though. Thankfully, he does that in his room which is on the other side of the house. That, and I told him I’d pimp-slap him if I ever got any more complaints. (He listens to me, for some strange reason).
Nah, my point is more like, if you move to a nice suburban neighborhood as a guarantee against dogs trespassing on your property, you’re going to be disappointed. If you absolutely insist no dog get into your yard, a fence is the best option I can think of.
The OP canvassed the neighbors and they all said they couldn’t hear anything. It’s only the one neighbor whose pregnant wife likes to take afternoon naps. The neighbor also suggested they move the band into their soundproof room. How did the neighbor even know they had a soundproof room? Do all the houses in this neighborhood have soundproof rooms? If taking afternoon naps is so important to this woman, why doesn’t she move herself into her own soundproof room? I just think having some kids practice their music once a month at reasonable volumes during reasonable hours is perfectly reasonable. This woman cannot insist the neighborhood provide her with absolute quiet during her afternoon naps. That’s unreasonable. Her soundproofing her room or getting earplugs or something, sounds reasonable.
This neighbor is going to be bringing an adorable little bundle of joy into the neighborhood soon. Should the OP ask her to keep the screaming and crying little darling in a soundproof room, or just move the kid elsewhere?
In the interest of future good neighborliness, I’d suck it up and get headphones. Or treat myself to dinner & movies once a month. Because if I complain about them, I can only assume they are eventually going to complain about me. Then it escalates and you’ve got neighbors who hate each other & call the cops on each other all the time.
If my neighbor called the cops on me for the occasional noise, I’d be really tempted to call child protection services the first time I heard a kid screaming or crying past 9PM. No, I wouldn’t really, but it would be tempting.
And I would simply add monthly afternoon band practice at reasonable volumes to the list of things not to call the cops about, or start a neighbor war over.
We agree on that!
On preview it appears this neighbor didn’t call the cops. OK.
Eric, I grew up in Chesterfield. For a second, I wondered if you were talking about my brother and sister-in-law, but she’s not pregnant (I don’t think she is, at least…).
Honestly, I don’t know what neighborhood you live in, but where I grew up (Monacan Hills, near Smoketree), a band would be enough to cause the neighbors to call the cops. In fact, the cops WERE called on my friend’s band one day when we were in high school - the garage door was down and they really were NOT that loud. I know in our neighborhood, people HATED noise. I’m not fond of it myself, but as long as it stops at a reasonable hour, I don’t see what the big deal is.
I’m glad you got it all taken care of - and hey, if this neighbor is a long-haired chef named Adam, please email me because my SIL is pregnant and keeping it from the rest of us:). (And if you want an awesome restaurant in Richmond, drop me and email and I’ll send you to my brother’s restaurant - it’s worth it!).
