Well, this is the same pastor who keeps 8 1/2 x 11 pictures of the Baphomet in his house too just to pass around.
Very true. All that stuff is evil and will cause demons to take over your life. Here, take a look at all these examples I just happen to have laying around!
(emphasis mine)
I think you misspelled “sphincter.”
I admire Jack Chick’s ability to convey the impression, purely through facial expressions, gestures and hairstyles, that the characters in the Masonry tract are all speaking with a harsh New Jersey accent.
However I’m intensely peeved to learn about that 40% discount on lumber and other construction supplies. Having lost my own soul through Dungeons and Dragons back in the mid-Eighties, I still only get 20% off previously released RPG product, not including CCGs or miniatures. On the other hand, at least I don’t have a foul-mouthed talking lizard embedded in my spine; as cool as such a thing sounds, judging by the tract they evidently have lousy Turning resistance. All those Masonic connections and lavish hardware discounts don’t mean jack if a jowly, scorbutic Pentecostal minister can quell your Baphomet-fueled berserker rage with a mere gesture.
Given that “Hate,” “Lying,” and “Stubborness” are also listed as sins, I think Jack himself will have some ‘splainin’ to do when he comes before the Pearly Gates.
Yes it was. The picture of the people rising to Heaven looks more like sperm shooting through a woman’s body.
Eh, it’s overrated.
Of course that’s what you’d say! Everyone knows that when you worship at the alter of the giant winged flying lizard, you can’t tell anyone. So misdirection is your tool of evil. Heretic!
Hey Mr. Mystery Mason, I’d love to convert over your reptile that gets bigger. No, really, it’s just because I need you, I mean me, to get in touch with my spiritual side.
Now on a more serious note, can anyone find that quote by Albert Pike anywhere but on Christian themed web sites? Those and by other illuminati theorists.
Finally, who does the black guy look like? For the first one, I’m getting a strong Shaft vibe after the conversion and the guy at the end decently reminds me of Ving Rhames. But the first one doesn’t come across as anything but constipated. What y’all get?
I believe that “quote” is actually from the famous Leo Taxil hoax (see this)
Pike did make some mention of Lucifer, but I’m not going to wade through all 900+ pages of Morals and Dogma again to try to find it. There is some more info on Pike’s Lucifer here.
I gotta go feed my new spine-lizard now.
I read the part about getting 40% off retail and figured it was going to be the Elders of Zion. Instead we got David Ickes. Jack can’t even keep his conspiracy groups straight. Pretty soon we’re going to have the Pope promoting gay marriage, D&D players shooting Reagan, and the Teletubbies mutilating cattle.
Hey! Wait a minute… Was I pwned here? Mr. Charisma 3??? I’ll have you know I rolled a 12 charisma. Admittedly, I rarely increased that because I feel a properly weilded broadsword makes up for many a personality fault, but 3?
I summon Baphomet!
I thought the same thing. And it explains a lot about Star Wars, too. But if Baphomet is anything like Jar-Jar, that’s a religion I want no part of.
You mean they don’t? 
Well, I’ll be darned. As a White Boy I’ve always heard fornication described either as shagging, a la Austin Powers, or as “shacking up”, but never as “shacking”.
Still, I’m glad to know that it’s an Equal Opportunity Sin.
Oh, man, I’m totally weirded out now. I come from a family of Masons and we never heard anything about a lizard, for crying out loud. I was a Job’s Daughter, my boyfriend was DeMolay, uncle (33rd degree), dad, grand Pooh-Bah types, aunts, cousins, Eastern Star, etc. We never did anything remotely satanic that I know of. Mostly we did fundraising. And community service work.
Satanic community service?
Very funny. Actually, that was funny. I guess it depends on your perspective as to how well we did it!
I have been reading Chick tracts and laughing at them for years, but this one takes the cake.
Old Jack is a seriously, seriously mentally disturbed individual.
Either that or he’s on some really, really good drugs.
There should be an arrow on Henry Clausen’s hat with an intruction “Baphomet: Apply directly to the forehead. Baphomet: Apply directly to the forehead. Baphomet: Apply directly to the forehead.”