It’s not a best practice, but it’s not the end of the world.
I don’t believe for a second that he can emotionally support kids in four households. I have two kids in one household and a normal job, and I have enough trouble feeling like I have time to really focus on my kids. Maybe he genuinely thinks he is there emotionally. Maybe it even works for now. But nobody can be there for five teenagers in four houses.
That said, being raised by a single parent isn’t the worst thing in the world. Families come in all types and there are a million ways to build a support system. But there are some drawbacks-- having a dating parent isn’t usually a great situation, for example.
It’s not what I’d set out to do, it’s not particularly responsible, but it doesn’t make him a horrible person.
I wonder how much child support is per child when you make that much, and how many NFL players have 18 year careers? Seems to me there will be a sharp income adjustment down the road for all involved, let’s hope they are all saving for such a day.
I’d wonder how long he’s been doing this - i.e., whether he’s going to have another 5 kids by the end of next year - and how long he’s going to continue being interested in parenting once the kids are teenagers and/or the moms are no longer hot babes.
Perhaps everything’s reasonable now (or perhaps everything seems reasonable to him, depending on how crappy his own upbringing may have been). But I would wonder how much of this is a planned state versus a state that he is simply okay with right now, before things have gotten out of hand.
I’m sure it’s possible for “creative” relationship dynamics to exist and be fine to all parties involved. But I think that also requires a conscious effort on all parties parts, at least, and that those people are actually the sorts to be able to pull it off.
For most people, that’s true, but there really are a surprising number of women who really don’t want the father involved as long as he’s supporting them financially, and of course lots of men who believe that their obligation ends with writing the checks, whether they live with the kids or not. As long as both are on board, it’s nobody else’s business.
…you’re saying no truck driver, train conductor/driver, no airline pilot, and no military people should ever be parents, ever. Plus however many other people (athletes, touring musicians, actors, etc.) travel as part of their work.
If someone takes a job that requires extensive travel as a way to dodge family responsibilities, yes, I would have an issue with that. I had a friend in my old town who said that her husband signed up for that kind of thing when their kids were babies, so he wouldn’t have to deal with diapers, midnight feedings, etc. :mad: He even admitted it. :eek:
AFAIK, they are still married. Their daughters would be young adults now.
I don’t know if I would call the NFL a job that requires extensive travel. If the player has his family living near his team then he is gone part of 8 weeks a year plus a couple of preseason trips. Some players choose to have their family live somewhere else so it’s more separation but that’s their choice as a family. Other sports have a lot more travel.
I’m saying it’s not ideal. When I see commercials about the wonderful technology that allows a parent halfway around the world to communicate with their kid, I think, how about working a regular job and being there in person with the kid.
But yes, it’s colored by my feelings about the military in general.
Quite a few you have had long careers have gone broke for various reasons. The bigger part of that 78% are players who made decent money compared to normal people but not nearly enough to last a lifetime and then are out in a year or two. NFL Players Association says the average career length is a little over three years. And many of those are making around the league minimum with no guarantees.
I really think that he would be doing the same thing if he was a CPA, auto mechanic, short-order cook, etc. Some people are just wired for this kind of thing, no matter what they do for a living.
I wonder if his child support payments will go down [del]if[/del] when he loses his gig in football. $29 million is a lot of money. After taxes, after his agent’s cut, after he retires, is it enough to last his children for the next 18 years, and himself after that?
Plus, it’s kind of depressing - four different women who don’t expect anything from a man except his wallet and a few weekends.
monstro and even sven basically sum up my position. Though he should just say he’s non-monogamous instead of basically saying it’s an intrinsic part of being an NFLer.
No pro athlete making tons of money has ever blown it all, right? He’s got enough money to support them NOW, but what about 10 years from now? Or when it’s time for them to go to college? Hell, he might not have enough for their college as it is…
Yes, if you’re talking about gay parenting. At least that’s the opinion of some people I talk to.
I wonder what people would think if a single mother had 5 children by 4 different men, but took care of all of them. Especially if she was a lesbian.:eek::rolleyes:
