Lunatic attacks 64 year old man on NYC using cordless power tools.
That’s got to be pretty terrifying, having some guy hacking at you with power tools. Now that this has hit the national media, I wonder how long it’ll be before there’s a copycat crime?
Obviously, a frustrated street magician, who couldn’t find a beautiful female assistant to saw in half.
DAMMIT! This country needs more women in ladies’ tuxes, top hats & fishnet stockings!
So very many jokes, but that’s a little too whacked and vicious for me to make light of. Besides, aren’t you supposed to demand the money before you attack? I’d just find it a little difficult to pull out my wallet while being vivisected…
[QUOTE=TuckerfanNow that this has hit the national media, I wonder how long it’ll be before there’s a copycat crime?[/QUOTE]
Measure twice; cut once.
Naturally, the Homeland Security response will be that subway workers will no longer be able to use portable tools.
Yikes! What the hell is going on? Copycats? There already is a rash of unprovoked subway violence. This is the fourth incident in a month! Around the middle of last month, a guy was stabbed on the train in Harlem. A day later two tourists where stabbed in the Times Square station and another guy was stabbed at the Rockefeller Center station! :eek: I take the D train to Rockefeller Center everyday for work.
Its the Mole People.
They’re emerging from the Subways & Sewers to wage ruthless war against Mankind & Headwaiters alike.
And just remember–I warned you all!
Yikes! MOLE PEOPLE!
The suspect has been charged with a 14.4 volt QuickCharge.
The national Terror Alert Level has been raised to Plaid.
My wife always made jokes about the holster I have on my tool belt for my cordless drill/driver. Well, it’s not so funny now, is it my pretty?
S’not mole people. It’s C.H.U.D.
Naw, CHUD moved to Peoria.
Could be Sleestacks, though.
Crip Sleestacks!
C.H.U.D.s, Molemen, Morlocks, whatever. I’m not fucking with any Edward Cordlesspowersawhands mother fucker.
You win the thread. 
Now this is why CNN is just plain useless for this kind of news: they leave out the most important details.
Well, we NRA types have been saying it for years: you take guns away from criminals and criminals get more creative.
If you can’t get ahold of a Sig, get a Sawzall.
They don’t want your money. They want your PAIN.
Can you believe that he used reciprocating saws? Geez, a job like this, you need a chain saw or a modified circular saw.
Always use the right tool for the job.
I have a Stryker and I’m not afraid to use it.