"No Elvis." -- Terminology unique to YOUR workplace

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
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That reminds me of one. I used to work in telecommunications (and am desperately happy to be out), and the tech guys had a term: NAT.

Context: When pitching something to the executives, or when designing dumbed-down descriptions for the marketing or sales teams, NAT would be used in critiquing the material. “NAT” stands for “Not Another TLA,” wherein of course “TLA” stands for “Three-Letter Abbreviation.”

The salesmonkeys and execs just loved using jargon to make themselves sound like the experts they weren’t, so the engineers and tech support people would sarcastically add to the margins of draft white papers: “Needs more NATs.”

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“Satan’s Offering Table”
Where you put leftover Halloween candy, extra muffins from meetings and other high-fat foodstuffs for coworkers to eat.

“Failed the Coolness Test”
What you’ve done when the computer works for everyone else, just not for you.

“Burn the Elvis Candle”
This is literal. We burn the Elvis-themed candle in the cubicle of obnoxious former-employees to ritually cleanse the office of their presence before a new employee moves in.

“Vagocentric Office”
An office in which all or most of your coworkers and superiors are women; “vag” as in vagina. A woman-coined, value-neutral term.