The OP was terrible. Oh, wait, no it wasn’t, it was nice. No, that won’t do either. It was crap.
Nobody tell him what we use ‘terrific’ for these days 
Why stop there? Life can be fun when you demand that words stop changing their meanings.
The rant was tremendous. (I trembled at it.)
It was terrific. (It caused feelings of fear)
It was brilliant. (It was kind of shiny.)
It was stunning. (It rendered me unconscious.)
It was great. (I found it large and coarse.)
It was nice. (But above all it was foolish.)
Paraphrasing Eddie Izzard – “One day you guys [Americans] will put a man on the star closest to the sun. ‘What’s it like?’ ‘It’s awsome!’ ‘What, like a hot dog?’”
Why stop there?
That car is cool. Better get a block warmer. It may not start.
That girl is hot. Take her temperature. We may have to go to the doctor.
That guy is so gay. Good to see him in high spirits. He’s been rather down lately.
Radical.
Gnarly, dude.
But what about Awesome To The Max?!
It’s out there. It’s just out there. It’s like, radical, in a tubular kind of a way. But most of all, it’s out there.
Any old folks remember when twitchin’ was the fashionable superlative?
Damn! You beat me to that. I guess I’ll just have to comment on the awesomely awesome-ness of this thread then.
Fuckin’ A.
I’m old, and I don’t remember it. I hope you’re not calling 30 old.
Other people have already pointed this out, but no you’re not. Glaciers are cool. A tall glass of iced lemonade is cool. A cadaver buried in the wintry garden is cool. You’re 98.6 Fahrenheit, and that’s not cool.
Nor are you “pretty,” much. Pretty means beautiful; pulchritudinous; attractive; ocularly quite satisfactory. It doesn’t mean “somewhat.”
Words never change their meaning. Their definitions were forged in the heart of a fiery star, aeons before humanity crawled out of the primordial mud, and on July 17, 1837, around teatime, we finally discovered the last definition of an English word.
Certainly people have, since the Day of Definitions, tried to counterfeit their own meanings for words. Such people are at best misguided fools and at worst dangerous radicals attempting to undermine the sanctity of the proven definitions of our most treasured language. I wholeheartedly applaud your cavil, with the two reservations mentioned above.
Wicked OP!
Daniel
raises hand
I have a question.
OK, what if you’re, like, a bubble boy or some shit? You know, like Brendan Fraser in “Blast From the Past” only more sheltered, and for longer? Or what if you’re, like, you know, Brendan Fraser from “Encino Man,” or Tim Allen’s kid from “Jungle 2 Jungle,” or maybe even Brendan Fraser again from “George of the Jungle,” or even Christopher Lambert from “Greystoke?” Anyway, you get where I’m going with the “sheltered” part.
So let’s say you’re all sheltered and shit, and then the explorers find you and bring you back to civilization, right?
And let’s say, like, the first thing you see, right? Is this, like, I dunno, microwave oven making some Croissant pockets, right?
So the freezing cold things go into the little cave, which LIGHTS UP!!! Holy shit!
And mere minutes later, it’s PIPING HOT!!! Burns Bomba’s tongue! With (gasp) NO FIRE!!!
Now, I’m going to assume that “awe” is one of a mix of emotions our little feral dude feels, right?
So have we empirically proven that Croissant pockets are awesome? because I totally think they are, dude.
(this is just a long-winded way of saying, "who are you to define ‘awe,’ for the rest of us, goddammit?)
I beat you BOTH to it. But did anybody notice? No.
Totally bitchin’ there dude!
I say this far too much actually, but I like it. As an aside, round at a friends house the other week, The Simpsons came on TV. He said 'They should retitle this programme ‘The Awesomes’. I agree with him.
Tough break Whoa Yes Way! Schwing! Dude sweet bling aksing youse guys booyah!
This thread is wicked keen.
But I just want to make an omelette!