C’mon people, put on your thinking caps and B.S. meters. There are 6.5 million land species on Earth. Don’t you think it’s a little far-fetched to believe old man Noah could build an ark big enough to fit two of each of those species? I don’t have my TI-50 handy to calculatethe total number of animals he’d need to accommodate, but let’s just say it’s over 10 trillion. And don’t forget, a lot of the animals alive during Noah’s day were mighty big: elephants, big foot, brontosaurus, Noch Nessie and King Kong just to name a few. Sorry, there’s simply no way an old man could build a marine stable vessel large enough to house that many big animals (not without some help from a few of his fellow villagers, anyway). The notion is beyond absurd. It encroaches into the realm of woo.
There is a scientific approach to this ark problem, however, that I think has a probability of over 90% being correct: Remember, God is not only omniscient and an omnivore…he’s also omnipotent—on this point I think we all agree. God just has to lay down some of his omnipotent mojo to give Noah a credible way to build a worthy ark.
Too many species on Earth now? Not a problem! God just has to time-travel Noah back to a time when there were far fewer species (and far fewer big ones), like just after the Permian-Triassic Extinction, ~252 Ma. I forget the exact percentage of species that went extinct then, but it was around 105%. So, a greatly reduced number of animals would need bunks back then, plus, the fat-assed mammals hadn’t even come on the scene yet. And I think we all know what happened to the big dinosaurs (hint: they changed their diets and flatulated themselves into extinction).
And, I know Noah was told to bring two of each species aboard, but don’t you think he probably cheated a little? You just need one of every species as long as it’s a pregnant one and she’s gravid with a least one boy (some incest would be involved at some point, but God didn’t consider that a sin back then).
Sure, Noah would still have to build a fairly large ark, but not big enough to board over 100-trillion.
After the rain stopped, and the animals de-boarded, God just had to do more of his mojo and have the animals undergo an accelerated rate of speciation of of an order ~1,000,000 fold for a while, ultimately leading to all the wonderful species alive today.
I think we can all agree that my hypothesis makes a lot more sense than believing Noah was capable of building a really huge ark. An alternate hypothesis involves giving Noah access to miniaturization device of some sort, but we can elaborate on that later.
