I got some news I’d been dreading Sunday afternoon. My youngest brother just started his junior year of high school and after all the calamity at the end of 2006 through last summer, he’s enjoyed a year of smooth and healthy sailing - there were little drawbacks, for example he’s struggled with some sports when he went back to camp, and his high school doesn’t want him to play soccer even though his doctors are fine with it - but apparently that was over. His last checkup was in March and it looked good.
A week or two ago he had an injection to help strengthen his vocal cords. He’s had one or two of those before, but this time he had some persistent pain in his neck, and just before Labor Day he had it checked out via MRI.
He doesn’t know this yet, but they found a mass. He’ll be in for testing tomorrow, but for now we’re forced to assume it’s chordoma cells. Not inside his skull this time, but somewhere behind his right ear in an area that was not irradiated when he was in Boston. I guess a surgery wouldn’t be nearly as dangerous or complicated, but if I learned anything from his time in the hospital, it’s that you never know with this stuff.
Oh, and I said he doesn’t know yet. He doesn’t. My parents have kept this quiet for about a week and a half. My mom’s reasoning was that he would only have worried and they wouldn’t be able to tell him anything other than “we’re going in for tests,” so she decided not to tell him until sometime today. It might be before I get out there, it might not, but either way I’ll visit tonight for whatever support I can give.
It’s weird to say this is the worst part, but I think the worst part is that on some level I’m forced to acknowledge that if I had to do this all again, I probably could. It’s bad because in some way that’s an admission that we might not ever be free of this particular kind of sludgy craziness that comes with hospitals and surgeries and illness. If we have to go back there I hope it’s not for long.
I’ve occasionally wondered how things were going for your brother and I’m sorry to hear that you’re facing these worries again. I definitely hope for the best possible outcome for him and wish strength to your family.
Oh no, not again. Just NOT fair. I saw the thread title and my heart sank. My very best wishes go out to you and all the positive thoughts and vibes I can generate.
Please know that your brother has a lot of people pulling for him. And for you. I offer any comfort or general pissed-offed-ness I can.
I lurked during most of the p2p era, but I’ve followed your brother’s difficulties. I’m crossing my fingers for him, certainly; I’m also going to attempt to send you a PM.
