Not So Elementary, Watson!

Cafe Society
1

I am standing around in a bar, taking on a little beer and minding my own business, and thinking about this and that, when something occurs to me which I think about from time to time, but never remember to ask.

This is a small matter of a name, this name being Watson, who is a croaker, or a doctor if you prefer it. Now, this Watson is a close associate of a party known in spots as Sherlock Holmes, who is a coming guy in the detective dodge, and Watson generally assists Holmes in the detection of various criminals of one kind or another, but the assistance he gives is by no means great from what I hear, but this is just my opinion.

Well, Watson is generally known as John to people who are acquainted with the guy, such as his wife, and I always consider this concludes the matter, until one day I read a story which is none other than The Man With The Twisted Lip.

This story commences with Watson sitting at home, taking it easy after a full day’s doctoring, and what happens but there is a ringing sound, and this sound comes from nowhere but the front door, which is equipped with a bell.

Now the door is answered by what appears to be a butler, and the party who rings the bell comes through the hall, and opens the door of the sitting room very fast.

Watson’s ever-loving wife, who is Mary, recognises this party as a doll by the name of Kate Whitney, and this doll seems to be somewhat distressed, as she is sobbing greatly and dropping many tears around and about.

So, Mrs. Watson gives the doll a big hello, and a hug or two, and says as follows:

‘It is very sweet of you to come. Now, you must have some wine, and water, and sit here comfortably and tell us all about it. Or do you prefer it if I send James off to get some shuteye?’

Well, this comes as a surprise, as I already say that Watson’s right name is John, and I mention this to several parties who are scholars and scribes, and they nod their agreement in the matter.

I am left wondering about this, and I am about to conclude that James is nothing but a misprint, but before I do this I check with other parties, such as those who read these pages, and I am grateful for any thoughts on this question whatsoever.

2

One of the great mysteries of the Canon, and over which much ink has been spilled. For an introduction to the Great Debate, check The Annotated Sherlock Holmes, with annotations by William S. Baring-Gould.

One solution sanctioned by Sherlockians is that “John” is Dr. Watson’s true first name, and “James” is a translation of his Scottish middle name, “Hamish” (His name is given in several places as “John H. Watson”).

There are, I have no doubrt, a great many other interpretations, and the interested reader may consult back numbers of the Baker Street Journal or other such ephemera. Or he may simply ignore it. As I’ve said on other occasions, Sherlock Holmes fans are the original “Trekkies”. And I say that not intending to disparage either camp.

Of course, I don’t think I’m saying anything the OP doesn’t already know.

I love the OP. The language and sense is perfect.

3

Yes, many, many, many, many pages have been written about this question. Many.

I have the book CalMeacham mentions. It’s excellent, but some of the footnotes make my head spin. Would you like to read half a page deciding if one of Holmes cases started on a Thursday or a Friday? Because in that year the full moon fell on Wednesday during March, but in April there was no rain, and rain is definately mentioned in the story…

So people that devoted obviously spend a lot of time trying to sort out Watson’s first name.

I’ll just advance my personal theory. Watson’s name was John. One day his wife accidently refers to him as James. In later stories it seems Watson isn’t married anymore. So Mary gave herself away with that little slip of the tongue…

4

All the time I am reading these stories, which is a long time indeed, I never know that many citizens are greatly interested in the doings of these guys, who are Holmes and Watson, such as the days of the week when these events occur, and other details which you state.

Furthermore my enquiry is most genuine, as I am a great hand at reading, but I am a slow guy in not making this request before now, such as 20 years ago, or maybe longer, and from other parties.

It seems to me that a guy who peeks at the history books, or some such, to discover whether it rains on a Thursday in this year or that, is a guy who stops at nothing in the matter of learning, and I do not say this is wrong.

So, when I read these tales of deduction again, I know there is no short answer to many enquiries I have, or maybe there is, and I place the proposition on these pages for various citizens to see, and I always consider these citizens are wiser than a treeful of owls.

5

This question is one which also bothers me more than somewhat over the years, as I am reading of this private dick Holmes and his croaker friend Watson since I am a college guy, some 20 years ago.

But what really bothers me is the location of the slug this Watson guy takes which is making him return to jolly old England in the first place, where he is first meeting up with his gumshoe friend in “A Study in Scarlet.”

It is well known here and about that in one story Watson says he is getting it in the leg and that in another story he says it is his shoulder or some other place higher up the carcass than a leg, and this leads to no little confusion among the citizens who follow such stories. In fact, the general opinion along Broadway is a guy with such a memory as this will not be welcome if it comes down to his testimony keeping a guy out of stir.

As for me, I will not trust a croaker who does not know the difference between a slug in the leg and a slug in the shoulder any further than I will trust Big Nig to hold the dice at one of Nathan Detroit’s crap games.

6

I think it was probably a Doyle error, but if you wish you can assume that James is the Watsons’ butler, and that’s who Mary is going to send off, in case the visitor wishes to chat with them privately. (Such as about the fact that her husband is a dirty dope addict.)

–Cliffy

P.S. BTW, the reason Mary Watson no longer appears in the later stories is because she has passed on. There’s only one offhand line about this, shortly after Watson discovers that Holmes is still alive. A few lines after Holmes finsihes explaining his miraculous survival at Reichenbach Falls (in “The Adventure of the Empty House”), the text goes on as follows: "In some manner [Holmes] had learned of my own sad bereavement, and his sympathy was shown in his manner rather than in his words. ‘Work is the best antidote to sorrow, my dear Watson,’ said he; “and I have a piece of work for us both to-night…’” That’s the only mention of Mary’s death that I’ve seen in all of the canon. I suppose it could also be interpreted to believe that she has left him, but that seems very unlikely given the turn of phrase “sad bereavement,” the Victorian times, and how happily in love the two seemed in previous appearances.

7

Interestingly enough, these minor lapses of inconsistency have given rise to the terms “Watsonian” and “Doylist” for internal and external answers.

Question: Watson refers to his having been shot in the leg in several stories, and in the shoulder in others. Where was he shot?

Watsonian answer: He was shot in both the leg and the shoulder. In different stories, he mentions the wound that is giving him trouble at the time, or which has otherwise caused certain relevant things to happen (as his discharge from the British army).

Doylist answer: Doyle screwed up. When writing The Sign of Four, he remembered that he had mentioned Watson’s getting shot in A Study in Scarlet, but had forgotten where, and didn’t re-read the earlier story.

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Where was Watson shot?

William Baring-Gould devotes a section to this very question. There appear to be several schools of thought:

  1. A single bullet hit Watson in the shoulder and tunneled its way to the leg where it came to rest. The shoulder wound was eventually forgotten, but the bullet in the leg was still bothersome during bad weather.

  2. Watson was wounded twice in combat once in the shoulder and once during evacuation. It is possible, if you consider the position of a man thrown over a horse for evacuation, that the second wound was not in the leg proper, but in a more modest part of his anatomy which accounts for the wound being seldom mentioned.

  3. Watson was wounded only once, not in the shoulder or leg at all, but in an unmentionable area. Perhaps in the rear as he bent to help a fallen comrade or, since all of Watson’s marriages were childless, in the front. Delicacy would have prevented Watson from referring to the genuine location of either wound.

  4. Watson received a second wound in a different venture, possibly again in Army service or on a case while assisting Holmes.

Referencing the OP question of John vs James, there was a book sanctioned by the Doyle estate and published c1990 (I don’t know where I hid my copy) of Holmes stories by contemporary authors. In one of the tales, actually a one-act play, it is suggested that the James was a slip of the tongue by Mary, a reference to her, to put it delicately, very good friend, a certain Professor of Mathematics who wrote a treatise on the Binomial Theorem.

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Or it could have exited out the front and buried itself in his leg, as happened to one John Connally.

10

Is this the same John Connolly who writes Every Dead Thing one time, or is this another John Connolly, and I know the spelling varies a touch.

11

Governor of Texas, 1963.

–Cliffy

12

Cliffy, this is the guy who is shot when Kennedy is killed, and I am ashamed I do not remember, and I say thank you for the jog to my memory.

13

I thought it was James Connally.

::ducks and runs::

14

The best answer to these and other questions brought up by the inconsistancies in the stories is that the mistakes were deliberate on Arthur Conan Doyle’s part to hide the fact he was talking about real people and real events.