He’s a copycat bulb holder.
And both cases involve alcohol. I see a pattern: “Woe unto him who uses intoxicants! For Allah will cause large, breakable objects to be stuck up his bum, for Allah is wise, and His chastisement is beyond our imagining.”
Okay, who watted?
The Master speaks, in a testament to humanity’s twisted ingenuity:
If I’d been drinking anything, you’d owe me a new keyboard and moniter! 
Am I the only one who’s thinking that this is what happens when Uncle Fester goes to prison?
Yeah, I probably am. 
Dude, I’m NOT pulling that string.
Bolding mine.
Um. That’s all, really. When did this book first get inserted?