I don’t think the weird homer tent material can be (well) tailored. I’m going to donate to Goodwill - maybe it wouldn’t bother someone else).
No! Wear them to your next Dopefest. I might drive to NJ to see 'em. 
I’ve done dumber stuff.
CIS Straight. FTR, I’m interested.
Congratulations on the weight loss! I can relate about the zippers. I have a few pairs of pants I like to wear to work, especially now, they’re lighter weight and it’s been warm here. Anyway, the zippers are sometimes iffy and I always think twice before putting them in in the morning.
I lost a lot of weight a few years ago and during the time I had a job that took me in to prisons on a regular basis. The first time I went I hadn’t realised they would make me remove my belt, stand on a little stage with my arms outstretched and run a wand over me. Yeah that’s how to get the respect of those you need to work with to see your clients, lose your pants completely upon first meeting.
Every time I went down a pant size I bought one pair a size even smaller to sausage myself into on prison days.
SHOES! I have some shoes, boots & sandals that I had to have because they were so cute. But wearing them for more than 30 minutes is torturous - so uncomfortable. But I hang on to them because they’re cute! Once in a while I’ll put a pair on, saying to myself, “they can’t be that uncomfortable” or “maybe they’ll be ok this time”. Of course by the time I get to work, I’m kicking myself and wishing I had different shoes on.
I got a million of em, but here’s a few:
I’m so glad some ladies’ blouse manufacturers are putting in hidden extra buttons. It’s a little hard to explain if you haven’t seen it, but inside the regular placket there is another, that has smaller buttons offset from the outer ones. This prevents “gaposis” over the chest. I have literally busted my buttons a few times in public. Usually I wear an undershirt or camisole under a blouse, but still.
Not workplace, but recently on vacation I had a pair of very comfy, expensive linen trousers, but they were a bit too large on the waist and baggy overall. Sat down, waist and hence the crotch area dipped too far, and split noisily. I was commando. :smack: (It was after swimming, and my undies had gotten sand in them in the beach bag, so I didn’t bother). We were none too close to the hotel, either.
Tangentially related, but a long time ago when I was working as security/concierge in a highrise, I walked over to give someone access to a freight elevator. IIRC, it was the second wearing of my uniform slacks, and yesterday’s unmentionables slid out of the trouser leg onto my shoe. I pretended I had to tie my shoe, and scooped them into my pocket before anyone saw…I think.
This has happened to my sad self in the past lol.
Pants and shoes.
I was going to a meeting at work, and took out a pair of brown slacks that I hadn’t worn in two years. I gained about 15-20 lbs or so over that time, so it was snug as hell. By the end of the meeting, I untucked my blouse and undid those suckers completely. I felt like I was going to pop.
Shoewise, I also had a pair of high heels that were a size 8. Unknown to me at the time, I grew a shoe size. I stuffed my feet into them anyway. Bad idea. My feet hurt like hell, and I ended up getting about four blisters on each foot from them. They were so inflamed that my boyfriend couldn’t even massage them, they were so tender and painful to the touch.
My new policy, if it doesn’t fit, either I’m losing weight or throwing it out! 
Yesterday, I wore a dress to work where my bra totally shows in back. I know it shows, but the office is always cold so I wear a sweater over it and it’s totally fine. Well, I stepped out of the office to go get some tea with a coworker (who I know has a crush on me) – and it was hot in that tea place. So I did that whole awkward dance of trying to take my sweater off but keep it so that it still covered my back so I wouldn’t be flashing my underwear at him.
I was always really skinny as a kid and young adult and needed a belt for my 30 inch jeans. Inevitably perhaps, after I hit my 30s I slowly began to put on weight and inches around the waist. At about age 50 I needed a smart pair of trousers and shirt for a family party to celebrate my father’s 80th and I decided I deserved something nice and quite expensive. These were to be the first time where I needed a 34 inch waist* and size large shirt but I figured I would get plenty of wear out of them before I needed the next size up, so money well spent. About a month after the party I suffered a huge emotional setback and lost my appetite almost completely for a couple of weeks and sometimes forgot to eat at all some days. After the crisis abated somewhat and appetite recovered I figured what the hell, I had broken the unhealthy eating habits that I had built up, I would grasp the opportunity to establish a better regime and it worked. I lost about 40 pounds and achieved my goal weight in four months. Three years later I still comfortably wear trousers with a 30 inch waist. Sadly those new, expensive clothes only got one outing and sit in the back of the closet.
*I know that does not sound all that big but I have a small frame and the weight did not sit well on me and was physically uncomfortable. Typically for a man most of the weight was actually above the waistband so the increase in trouser size belied a somewhat greater weight gain.
Let’s avoid comments like this one and a few others you’ve made in this thread…they’re coming exceedingly close to “Don’t make sexual comments in threads not about sexual stuff” rule.
Our work uniform is cargo pants and a button-down shirt that are hand-made. Yes, at some point someone in this organization decided that rather than picking something out of a Dickies/Carrhartt/5.11 catalog, it was worth the time & expense to go downtown to a hole-in-the-wall clothing shop* and get measured, have a test uniform made, go back downtown to try it on, have alterations done, go back downtown again to try it on again, then have 4 more made.
I’ve put on a little weight since I got here. I’ve split the inseam of two of my pants, from crotch to knee… once on the flightline, installing landing gear pins while recovering an aircraft (thankfully it was after sunset), and once in the hangar while climbing on top of an aircraft. Not a great thing to have happen in a Middle Eastern country.
- We suspect the clothing shop is owned by a relative of someone in our local sponsor company. Nothing else we can come up with explains why the company spends the equivalent of $750 per person on shitty polyester uniforms that are hot in summer, cold in winter, and barely last 2 years. Not to mention 2+hrs on the clock (but not working on the aircraft) each time someone has to go downtown to get measured or try on.