Now that Elon Musk has bought Twitter - now the Pit edition (Part 1)

$8/mo for a link to an image of a small blue checkmark is a pretty good scam. I’m thinking of starting a similar business. I’m going to call it “Elmo Genie”, and the terms are even better than Elmo’s. The business model is that you send me only $5 a month (or a one-time payment of $600, good for life) and in return, I promise to wish you good luck (because you’re obviously gonna need it).

It’s now not possible to search Twitter or click on trending topic unless logged into a Twitter account. It’s happened before, albeit temporarily, so we’ll have to see whether it persists.

#BlockTheBlue is trending heavily. Seems reasonable.

I just use the “following” tag, and ignore “for you”. I know that everyone in “following” is someone I chose to follow, so I already verified their authenticity.

Unfortunately the change means it’s much more difficult to verify authentic accounts now, so I’m much more reluctant to follow more accounts.

My understanding is that TracFone offers service for a minimum of 90 days (per their refill cards). So Elmo would be able to sell the numbers of people with TracFone accounts just as easily as those with landlines or more-prestigious cell phones.

Of course the telemarketers might come back and complain 91 days later, but why would Elmo care??

Don’t be giving that stain any ideas. ‘Being wished Good Luck by a Certified Genius–that’s worth paying for, right???

I mean, this is the guy who carried a sink into Twitter headquarters, assuming everyone would be impressed by the brilliance of the concept.

You can buy 30 day plans

The point is more that giving a phone number doesn’t in any way confirm someone’s identity.

As a side note, they’ve gotten a lot cheaper since I last used them.

Yes, exactly—it’s clear that it’s just another way for Elmo to make money (from the sale to telemarketers and, presumably, data aggregators in general)—even if the buyers will complain after a mere 30 days rather than the 90 I’d assumed.

TracFones used to be available for $5 apiece. What with inflation I doubt that’s still true, but even so, it would be a relatively inexpensive way to avoid giving Himself anything that actually has value.

IF having a blue check is seen as desirable, anyway.

Elmo has now stuck a checkmark on the account of legendary shitposter dril, who’s been one of the posters at the forefront of #BlockTheBlue.

Dril is taking things in stride.

Dril then changed his profile name, which makes you lose the checkmark - and Elmo put it back.

Agile bullying!

Gifting Twitter Blue to all the biggest accounts that don’t want them in an effort to stop this protest is both funny and pathetic. I don’t give a fuck, I’ll block them anyway. Goodbye Stephen King, Goodbye Dril, I’ll still see screenshots of all your tweets worth seeing.

As of this moment he’s checkmarkless as he changed his nane again. We’ll see if Elmo wants to keep hot-potatoing him.

He also forced one on Chrissy Teagan just now, and Matt Binder too.

Did you know if Twitter gold rejects your verification application, they still keep your first $1000?

She got her lawyers involved and got her money back, so in the end she’s only out the self-respect of letting everyone know you were going to give a billionaire $1000 a month for a gold checkmark. Which is kinda just as bad or worse.

He gave everyone fair warning that he was going to sink Twitter.

The sad thing is that I’m sure he’s smugly convinced he’s “winning” something in all this.

At the moment they have one $5 model.

Oh, and at some point, Elmo gave the New York Times their checkmark back.

Gotta love this business model of getting people to subscribe to your service by giving it for free to people that don’t want it. Agile marketing!

So in other words, we’re back to the same “lords and peasants” system Elmo was complaining about when he bought the place.

Trump has his check back, which would seem to confirm this - no way in hell is he springing for $8.

Christ, that’s like going to cemeteries and baptizing dead people.

…because I live in the southern hemisphere, I typically alternate between “for you” and “following” because while I’m active on Twitter, most of the people I actively follow are fast asleep and don’t shop up in the following tab. Even with Elon’s multiple changes, it still worked quite well for me. Until yesterday when I started being spammed by fan accounts :smiley:

I woke up this morning and “for you” seems to have fixed itself. No more having to explain why my feed was wall-to-wall photos of Hailee Steinfeld LOL

Adjust your sleep schedule, join us in the Eastern Standard Tribe.

I wonder how Elmo’s Saudi financiers feel about this.