Now that Elon Musk has bought Twitter - now the Pit edition (Part 1)

His brother Kimball has a house and restaurant in Boulder.

Besides, I’m pretty sure that all the tech bros think of Denver as a suburb of Boulder (source: am a Boulder-based tech bro).

Probably related to that, for a brief time Boulder was the location of the only (or one of the only) Tesla store fronts in the world (or maybe just the only one in Colorado). This was 2010 or so Roadster era Tesla.

I’m waiting for the inevitable property auction when the contents of the Twitter office are liquidated by the landlord to cover back rent. Maybe get some nice chairs really cheap.

Of course, it won’t be like the dotcom crash, when many auctions were a local, in-person, only affair, and there were many deals available. It will all be online, and I’m sure 6 year old Mac Minis will sell at a premium because of hype and the outside chance of some unencrypted documents.

Well, at least they’re still raking in ad money for… (checks notes) pocket-size knife launchers for kids.

It’s probably just a scam to steal credit card numbers.

Probably. It seems like the only people running ads on Twitter any more are Chinese drop-shippers with made-up brand names like “Reenus” or “Bovu” or “Weki”, selling products you’ve never heard of that probably don’t even work.

I block them all on sight, which is getting to be tough work since every third tweet or so is one of them.

Facebook is really bad for this, too. I’ve been browsing, via Amazon and Google, zero gravity outdoor chairs and now I’m getting all these Facebook ads for those chairs at a price of $3.99 each.

Some people are really gullible.

100% my experience.

“You’ll put your sister’s eye out with that thing!”

“You bet mom! See, I put her eye out at 30 yards easy with the Zemmo mini-archery kit!”

< sister > “Aaagghhhhhhhh!”

Are Twitter ads not targeted? The ads I get are mostly about drones, #cience, car stuff, electronics, and investment firms.

My Twitter ads are all Quantum Computing, how to fight off horny Supermodels, and penis reduction surgery.

Weird. Mine are all about quantum penises, how to fight horned surgeons, and modeling supercomputers.

I do what I can to prevent sites from learning how to target me. Facebook seems to think I’m a married gay Jewish ex-Boy Scout who’s shopping for engagement rings and was stationed at Camp Lejeune between 1952 and 1987, so it seems to be working.

I don’t know if I’m ashamed or proud to say that I have actually bought something from a targeted ad, but instead of Twitter it was here on the SDMB. I had been googling around for a quilted flannel shirt but couldn’t find anything heavy enough. Then the next day pretty much the exact kind of shirt I wanted appeared for me in a targeted ad here on the SDMB, so I clicked through and bought it. This was two or three years ago, and it’s the only targeted ad on any site I’ve ever clicked on and then bought something, so hopefully that one moment of weakness generated some pennies for the SDMB ad revenue. I felt dirty, as if I were buying something off the TV from ronco.

It’s a fantastic shirt, by the way. It’s what I wear to get the mail during the winter. Friggin’ thing is warm enough to go dog sledding.

I’m reminded of this scene:

What they do, these jammers, they talk about plots… Escapes mostly, but plans for all kinds of mischief. They do it to confuse the observers… The plots they talk about are always make-believe. Control can’t know until they’ve checked them out.
The Prisoner, “It’s Your Funeral”

Well, Musk apparently has one fan:

Highlights:

Ad spend in ‘several categories’ is up 40% year over year, including healthcare, consumer devices and investment services.

Twitter has applied to the gov’t to be a payment processor.

Focus on more video, and spending money on contrnt creators. 10% of the time on Twitter is spent watching video.

Warner Brothers, Walmart, McDonalds and other large companies have resumed ad spending.

If he’s looking to form partnerships with news and media producers, it might have been a smart idea to NOT reply to their inquiries about the company with a poop emoji.

Unless he’s going to eschew mainstream content altogether in favor of news outlets like The Epoch Times, American Greatness and the Catturd2 blog.

In which case, he won’t get far with advertisers.

His new plan is interesting but it seems he’s spent the past year sabotaging his chances by rage trolling.

And how much is it down by in others?

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no.

And only eight years after Facebook blew billions of dollars on the same harebrained idea!

What a coincidence. Warner, McDonald’s, and Walmart are all on my block list!

On the subject of piracy…

https://www.cnn.com/2023/06/15/tech/twitter-music-publishers-lawsuit-copyright/index.html

This is a fascinating strategy. “I know, let’s focus on the thing that is currently only 10% of our business (=not 90%), which is already the main area for TikTok and YouTube, and which every other social media platform already also does, and which uses a ton of bandwidth which some of our users really don’t appreciate.”

I mean, it’s nice to be ready for the post-literate society that they’re hastening in and all, but this seems spectacularly hare-brained.