No, I got that - but it’s still not really my idea of hardcore porn (not that there’s anything wrong with that, either - Pregnant women have just as much right to their sexuality as any other person.) I don’t really distinguish between fetish and “ordinary” nude stuff when it comes to this sort of thing. It might be that I’m used to a lot of crossover stuff in the European “art nude” stuff I peruse, but I’m inclined to thinking there really shouldn’t be a difference anyway..
I’m assuming that when you say “fetish modelling” you mean the term of art as it’s used in websites and Chappelle and Stern magazin and Taschen coffee table book sense, here - leather, rubber, ponygirls, light bondage - not so much with the scat and golden showers, right? So like Dita Von Teese’s earlier latex work or the like.
They’d be wrong to. It’s not like they’re actually in the pictures (unless this is ultrasound fetish, which would be a new one for me, but Rule 34, ya know?). I mean, yeah, sure, it’s a bit unsettling to find your parents are sexual animals, but by rights the kid isn’t going to be seeing the work until they’re old enough, right? I mean, they’re not going to be reading fetish modelling books in First Grade. So this picture is, in reality, no different than her previous work except for people who believe that just the acknowledgement of the existence of a totally unseen foetus is a bad thing.
Me, I like pregnant ladies, I find them beautiful - not in a direct sexual fetish way, mind you - I don’t seek out pregnant porn, but neither does the state of pregnancy kill my boner for a beautiful woman. Demi Moore, Claudia Schiffer, etc (although Mariah Carey, for some reason, did NOT look good pregnant).
He should say something. The way it sounds, before they were together, it wasn’t all sexual nude posing, if she was in the art department. I think the line is drawn between nudity as art and nudity meant to be sexual. I’m thinking about her posing Demi-style for a painting class is okay, her posing with bits showing in a sexual manner not so much.
He should tell her and ask her not to take the job. People get weirded out by all kinds of stuff, and if you can’t talk to your spouse about something that is an issue and expect some understanding from them, then what’s the point?
Also, their situation has changed enough that rehashing this kind of thing is probably a good idea anyway. When they got married, she was planning to quit modeling “soon,” (we don’t know how much time has elapsed and how close to the “big 3-0” she is) and that plan has changed. That alone merits a discussion. Pregnancy can also result in big changes in both prospective parents’ feelings about each other and their family’s future. That change in perspective is also worth discussing. Relationships that can’t grow while taking both partners’ changing needs into account are doomed. “This is what we’ve done before” is not the best justification for anything.
Now, I have no opinion on whether or not she should still take the job, but I can’t see how them discussing it could fail to be constructive.
If I were in this situation, I would have said from the start that I was uncomfortable with it, but that as a grown ass woman, I can’t tell her not to.
Then, when this came up, I would hope that she would be willing to listen when I said that this, being way more intimate due to her “delicate condition”, would be pushing the line for me. But it would still be her choice. She’s a partner and a spouse, not a child or a slave.
IRL, neither would bother me overly much. Photography is just art.
From the OP: “They hit off immediately, dated briefly, and a married little over a year ago”
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The way it sounds, before they were together, it wasn’t all sexual nude posing,
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But some of it was:
“Hope has done a great deal of modeling, both clothed and nude, for painters, photographers, and occasionally film; some of it was fetish work”
That still doesn’t tell us exactly how close to her “hitting 30” quitting date she is, which is why I thought it was relevant that her plans had changed. Yeah, she got pregnant “soon” after them marrying, but whether she’s 2 months from when she said she was quitting versus 3 years, it makes a slight difference. I still think they should discuss it, but in the former situation her husband might have realistically thought she was pretty much out of modeling for good even before she got this offer.
The OP says that Hope is in her late 20s. To me (and I wrote it), that means she is at least 27 and perhaps as old as 29, and which in turn means she was at least 26 when they married, and possibly as old as 28. I’d be inclined to say that, at the time she’s offered this gig, she’s probably staring 30 in the face. She already believed her modeling career was on the wane and had specific plans for what to do afterwards; and since she’s called Sean’s project her last hurrah, she’s obviously not planning to do more work (or maybe just no more nude work) after the baby. If she were as young as 27 and about to have her first baby, she’d be less likely to think of the gig in question as her final modeling job.
Of course, my opinion is not privileged just because I wrote the OP.
ETA: My reading of the dates would also explain why Michael’s kept his mouth shut before this. If Hope had already decided to quit on her 30th birthday, and said birthday was inside of a year even when they married, why risk estranging her by insisting that she stop a few months early?
I know, but it creates a precedent where Michael wouldn’t be an asshole for asking her not to do it. It wasn’t all fetish work before, so if he said he was okay with non-sexual nudity while pregnant, it avoids that sticky ‘should have said something before marriage because he gets a package deal’.
Except he’d be lying, wouldn’t he? From my reading of the OP, it’s her nudity in general that bothers him, not just the fetish stuff. Only some of the series will be fetish, but it’s all nude. And that bothers him.
I don’t read the OP quite the same way. He’s ambivalent about her nude modeling: sometimes bothered, sometimes excited, sometimes peripherally proud. I’d guess that he’d be happy if she only did simple nudes, but is discomfited when she does erotic poses with a partner, or anything involving bondage and such.
I think he’s got a right to tell her it makes him uncomfortable and they should discuss it as a married couple. Maybe she’ll convince him, maybe he’ll convince her, but if either one starts in with a “How dare you” reaction, the marriage would probably be as good as over.
Also, why would this be her last modeling hurrah? She’s 29, not dead. I’m sure there’s plenty of clothed modeling work out there for a gorgeous woman in her early 30s.
Untrue. Some of that is a simple rephrasing of the OP
and some of it is a logical inference, which is why I put I’d guess before “he’d be happy …” etc. I don’t claim to have a privileged reading of the OP just because I wrote it, but to claim that the bit you quoted is not in the OP is perverse.
Which is why I’d say Michael should suck it up and deal. At most I’d advise him to ask Hope if she’s comfortable with their eventual son or daughter (let’s say daughter) seeing photos of Hope naked in bondage gear while pregnant with her. But any discomfort about simple nude photos need to be kept to himself.
It’s her last hurrah in her judgment. She’s clearly not a supermodel, as she’s working in a college art class when they met. She was planning before they met to stop posing and go to grad school when she turned 30. To me that means that “last hurrah” means “excellent stopping point.”
I just think nude modeling is something that can be done *before *a marriage. I think some things can and should be reserved for the life partner you chose, and nudity is one of those things on my list. No, I don’t care what other people do, but I would not be thrilled that my husband or wife insisted on continuing nude modeling even after the marriage, which probably wouldn’t occur anyway.
At the core of it of course is a general discomfort with public nudity.
I’m just not seeing the distinction between generic nude and fetish modellling and nude modelling while pregnant, so the whole enterprise left me feeling kinda “meh.” Didn’t buy it. Could see Michael having problems with the nude/fetish modelling, or could see him not having problems, don’t see how the pregnancy matters.
Some people are funny about pregnancy. There’s a general impetus to desexualise pregnant women (which is ironic if you think about how they got that way!) - I suspect part of the Madonna/Whore dichotomy.