Oh, this is fucking RICH - Illegal immigration and abortion are linked!

The BBQ Pit
1

Yeah, baby. You heard that right. A Missouri state House Special Committee is issuing a report that illegal immigration and abortion are linked, because abortion is causing a shortage of American workers.

This is, bar nothing, the dumbest fucking thing I’ve ever heard. I mean, my God. What kind of brain-dead, knuckle-dragging, pinheaded douchebag moron would you have to be to believe this bullshit?

All six Democrats on the committee refused to sign the report, calling it ridiculous and embarrassing.

All 10 Republicans signed the damned thing, which I’m mightily tempted to label an abortion in itself.

:smack:

2

I actually just finished reading a book (fairly popular, I think, it’s called freakonomics) that does state that abortion is causing a shortage in american criminals…

Maybe this panel of 10 republicans did a study that shows that all of the aborted fetuses are willing to work for under minimum wage? Fuck it, I don’t know, does this surprise anyone?

3

Well, I certainly wouldn’t be willing to pay more than minimum wage to an aborted fetus.

…unless it was like, for a really important job and I just couldn’t find aonther qualified candidate.

4

Hold on tight. Republicans are going to be the minority party in Congress, and it’s invariable that some of them will say some incredibly dumb shit in the next two years as they try to get back in charge.

5

Yeah, its amazing. If you say soething dumb in public your friends and maybe even your family will ridicule you to death.

If you say something dumb on the SDMB you’ll probably get pitted, and at the very least people will tell you what an ass you just made out of yourself.

But a government official? They say something dumb and get paid for it! :mad: …*and someone somewhere will still vote for 'em. *

6

I, for one, am impressed by their logic. It butresses my theory that abortion helps terrorists.

If we had 44 million more Americans, there would have been enough Sky Marshals to thwart the 9/11 attack.

And with 44 million more Americans, we wouldn’t be whining nearly as much about the few that get blown up by car bombs in Iraq every day.

7

*Shortage *of American Workers? Wait, I thought Teh Illegals were stealing our jobs and putting us out of honest work.

I’m so behind in the lastest advancements in bigotry.

8

As a resident, I feel it behooves me to say that the statehouse is full of morons. As a resident, I also feel it important to point out that I didn’t vote for a single fucking one of them. So no, it doesn’t surprise me at all.

And while (R)s are going to be the minority in the US Congress, they are still a majority in Jeff City. So while they do, did and most assuredly will say stupid things, said things have no bearing on their minority or majority status. They are simple people, salt of the earth, settlers of the American west.

Y’know, morons.

9

Your question got me to thinking…

And I concluded they have a point.

It’s a morally reprehensible point, and it’s hidden, but it goes like this:

The presumptive 44 million aborted babies, if they had been allowed to grow up, would have been disadvantaged. Unwanted, most likely neglected and unloved, born to largely poor and single parents, these babies would be so far behind the competition in education and socialization that they’d have little choice BUT to take minimum-wage jobs. Since minimum wage is, by definition, the minimum, they would thus impose the lowest possible burden on our fat-cat corporations.

Thus, the real root of their distress is not that “abortion kills babies”, but that “abortion deprives us of a source bodies condemned to labor so unrewarding it’s little better than slavery.” Parse that and you get “allowing poor people to have abortions (remember: rich people ALWAYS have taken care of daughters “in trouble”, the law only affects the poor) deprives me of their services as virtual slaves.”

So you can see they are really are after moral betterment after all.

Sailboat