Obviously, Tom Cruise did not single handedly win the Battle of Britian.
He had Goose helping him.
Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?
Probably not. Especially considering that Paramount fired Cruise and his agent’s talking about barring any of his clients (namely some of the biggest names in Follywood) from working for Paramount. So not only is the Couch Jumper currently “unemployed,” but he’s also managed to piss in the Wheaties of some of the major names in Follywood. He keeps this up, and he’s liable to be beaten like a baby harp seal by every star in Follywood.
He’s not, though. He now works for Dan Snyder.
That’s all it takes. He has now joined the MacTavish clan.
MacTavish gets drunk in the bar and starts bemoaning his life. “I built this bar and do they call me MacTavish the Housebuilder? Nay. I built the bridge over the stream outside and do they call me MacTavish the Bridgebuilder? Och, no, but fuck one wee sheep…”
I doubt that’s really going to mean much at all, since according to the article, Dan’s only going to be shelling out a couple million a year at most. Note that TC demands $20 million a picture, and your average low-budget music video costs around a couple mil these days.
Anyone else seeing a new direction for his career?
Tom Cruise and the Thetans!
For some reason, I’m now picturing Cruise dressed as the Fat Elvis[sup]TM[/sup], dancing and singing about how much he loves L. Ron.
I was looking forward to the climatic final battle where Tom wins the Battle of Britan by sinking the Bismark.
Hawker Hurricanes with lasers and Sidewinder missiles with biological warheads vs Nazi tripods from Mars!
Can’t wait.
VTOL P51 Mustangs landing outside Hitlers bunker, swarms of US Marines dashing inside blasting all before them before kicking Adolfs ass and giving Eva a savage rogering.
Meanwhile Tom Hanks is strolling along the Unter den Linden pontificating and Barry Pepper is idly taking potshots at SS troopers.
FUBAR?
Nope, that was McGuyver.
Tom Cruise saved England, Tom Hanks freed France, after saving Africa and Sicily. I don’t know why the history books waste so much paper trying to complicate things. And let’s not forget that Warren Beatty made Russia into a true Workers’ Paradise. And Richaes Gere , albeit with the help of a beautiful Chinese lawyer, straightned out the Chinese justice system.
In fact, we’ll never understand how we saved Iraq, until Hollywood figures it out and tells us. I thought George Clooneu, but Jake Gyllenhaal lost again by his unmanly crying.
Eh, they’ll let me know some day,
You forgot to mention John Wayne defeating the Japaneses, invading France and protecting South Vietnam.
With Robert Mitchum tagging along in a jeep ignoring his busted leg…
“Run me up the hill son” fishes cigar out lights up and chews on it
Exactly ! It is always nice to encounter somebody else who knows history 
Exactly. All anyone needs to know is we have always been at war with Eastasia. But I’m a little concerned about this “memory” you have of an “election” :dubious: .
Bosh! That’s ancient myth now/
The most recent Hollywood Scholarship has France being saved by Tom Hanks and Tom Sizemore.. Besides, the Duke was too busy in the Pacific, training construction teams to kill, and Mithum spent most of the war stuck on an island protecting a nun, before settling down to a distinguished career as a men’s deodorant.
Well, it’s good to see that the Tom Cruise projects are maintaining the same “high” “quality” of historical accuracy. :rolleyes:
Most of us on this side of the pond who actually know a bit of history know the idiocy of the film in question. In my view, one of the better telepics on the subject was a short series by the BBC: Piece of Cake, which dealt subtly with the role played by the non-UK pilots serving in the RAF, including the random, occasional US citizen.
Rest assured, the distortions involve more a need to hopelessly aggrandise the Cruise character, and by extension, the Biggest Littlest $cientolgist Ever. He and his minions do this in pretty much every movie that he’s in. It’s not so much a US act of false aggrandisement, but rather the usual Cruise Protocol.
And given the additional involvement of the guy who helmed Top Gun, we are assured of atrocious levels of historical, technical and tactical accuracy.
:rolleyes:
There is nothing worse than someone that doesn’t know their history.
John Wayne had the busted leg.
Robert Mitchum chewed on the cigar on the beach and said
Jeez get it straight will you?
Oh, cut 'em some slack. Wayne was in Europe so rarely that it is not hard to confuse his various roles. Heck, one time he was actually commanding a German ship (although he was carefully never faithful to Hitler before we sank him).