So there I was, minding my own business, getting my daily exercise at the health club I belong to. It’s a very nice facility, with all the amenities of a full service spa, basically. It’s pricey, about 50 bucks a month, but well worth it…until thong boy.
Now presumably, thong boy pays the same thing I do, so I’ve got no real bitch about what he wears to swim. If he wants to wear a banana hammock for swimtrunks, more power to him, except it’s kinda gross to wear only underpants to swim, but whatever.
The problem I have, comes when thong boy takes his thong off and combs his hair. Now it’s at this point you may ask yourself ‘what the hell is this guys’ damage? He doesn’t like the way someone combs their HAIR?’
Well, see, the thing is, that he does this, while nude, which, again, in a locker room is no great shakes, it’s the standing on the bench that I object to.
Yes, that’s right, there’s a naked man, STANDING ON A BENCH, combing his hair. With his wee willie scarcely swinging in the breeze right at FUCKING EYE LEVEL.
Look, fuckwit, STOP STANDING ON BENCHES WHILE NAKED. I don’t want your junk wigglin itself at me on my way to the steam room. And while we’re at it, thong boy, howsabout putting a fucking towel down BEFORE sitting on the community furniture. The benches are one thing, but these chairs are FABRIC, ya asshole.
People sit down on them to fix their shoes, watch tv, relax a minute, and sometimes they do so in good clothes, which are NOT complimented by your ass gravy, fucktard.