I assume you’re a guy, yes? Isn’t it women that rub your head? What could be bad about that?
To many of the people that call me:
Don’t just automatically answer yes if you didn’t hear the damn question in the first place! Fucking pisses me off.
Me; Are you working with an insurance broker?
them; Yes.
Me; ok, who is your broker?
them; What?
me; Who is your broker?
them; I don’t have a broker, what are you talking about?
AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGG
Deal or No Deal. What the fuck? It’s 100% skill and a true exemplar of the immensely popular “stretch as little content over as long a time-slot as possible” genre; what’s more, it brings out all the annoying-as-fuck armchair know-it-alls who feel the need to grouse about everything the contestant does and how they would have made an immensely better arbitrary decision.
Sadly, that’s not always the case. I guess I just have the kind of head that attracts all types.
I see this all the time here in San Francisco, but i’m sure it’s not an intentional fashion choice. Tourists come to visit in July or August and don’t pack anything but T-shirts and shorts. As the frigid fog blows in from the ocean, the souvenir shops’ sales of 49’ers hoodies and Golden Gate Bridge sweatshirts go through the roof. 
"The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco,’’
-probably not Mark Twain
The difference here, of course, is that you don’t expect your boyfriend to come over and close your windows. Do you? 
There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. But I’ve done it myself and had people look at me as if I had two heads.
Dear Manchild With A Tiny Penis Overcompensating By Driving An Enormous Truck:
I know you have spent lots of time and money raising your truck to enormous heights, putting on ginormous tires, and making your engine loud. What you do in your free time is fine with me. What I happen to do in my free time is ride my bicycle around the neighborhood. I’m appreciate it if you would fucking stay out of the bike lane. This is my area of the road, and just because you’re so high off the ground that I probably look like an ant to you, doesn’t give you an excuse to be a jackass.
Furthermore, if you rev your engine at me one more time, I’m going to get a 10-foot pole, vault up to the cab of your truck, and stick my air pump up your ass. Consider yourself warned.
Kind Regards,
Jakeline
Well, not on my computer. He is, of course, wholly responsible for opening and closing the hard-to-get-to-and-annoying-stiff window over my bed as often as necessary for my comfort and convience.
mischievous
Backstabbing friends, that only hang around when their other “friends” shit on them. Then shit on you in turn.
I’m a fucking glutton for punishment. :rolleyes:
-
Lady, you saw me looking at the items in an aisle at the supermarket. I saw you coming up the aisle, so I moved back to let you pass and then WAITED for you to do so. What gave you the fucking idea that you could then stop in the exact same place I was in a moment before?
Me: “Excuse me! I moved out of the way so you could pass, not stop”.
Cow: “Oh, I’m sorry. I though you were finished”.
Me: "That is because your brain is small, luckily you have another one in your hips to control that end of your body. Please activate it and move your ass! -
Yes, I know that your project is way over budget and past due. And I know you want me to do something about it and bail your pathetic ass out. Unfortunately, I am a subordinate and can’t take the one proper action that guarantees this won’t occur again: Firing you butt out of here. Unfortunately, there are many more where you came from, so it would be a temporary solution at best.
No, I will not take responsibility, nor put up with the consultant saying I wasn’t as helpful as I should have been. I guess it is assumed that I will ignore all the rest of my users who rely on me for their daily business needs in order to cater to your little project that affects only a few people. Maybe you should have staffed appropriately when I fucking well told you this in the first place! And when you tried to blame it on my subordinate I gave you the same documented answer. See, I am on to your little tricks now. You can’t blame this one on me this time. 'Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Attempt to fool me three times and I’ll put a contract out on you, bitch!*"
The real reason this project has failed is the exact same reason all the projects fail: HIRING PROJECT MANAGERS THAT GET PAID BY THE FUCKING HOUR AND THEN NOT SUPERVISING THEM LIKE A PROJECT SPONSER SHOULD!!!
Maybe you could get off your fat butt and run the stupid project that no one wanted or needed yourself. But, then we’d really see just how incompetent you actually are, wouldn’t we? Why don’t you go attend another meeting. It’s all you’ve been doing for the last half of your career anyways and it allows the rest of us to carry on doing the real work. Fucker.
*Different project: I remember a couple of years ago we had this 350lb cow out here who was working on a project. She was a major bitch and fucked up everything. I was asking the nationals if they knew of any bedouins in the area who were looking for another wife. They laughed. I laughed… She was lucky the project didn’t go on for much longer than it did, because towards the end there was much less laughter and more of a speculative look in everyone’s eyes!
This one’s for you. (It’s about small cars, but the mentality is the same for bikes.) 
I pit posters who quote entire prior posts, even if the prior post is the one right before their reply, and even if only one little thing is being replied to. Drives me up the fucking wall. There’s one poster in particular who does this and it makes me crazy. Then I get more annoyed because it’s such a trivial thing to get aggravated about.
Which poster would that be?
OuryL. Drives me bugshit too. Drives me batty when people do this as the second post in. You know what, I just read the OP - I’m getting old, and my memory ain’t what it used to be, but I think I’ve still got a pretty good handle on that one.
YES! And KSO, I think I know exactly who you’re referring to. I often wonder if they don’t know how to post any other way. Maybe they’ve never moved the mouse a smidge to the right and noticed the Quick Reply button. Maybe they’re idiots. It shouldn’t bug me, but it bugs me that it bugs me.
I pit my parents and teachers for allowing me to think “yelling” was that thing when someone was loud and angry. So when I’m getting some story from someone about how their doctor “yelled” at them and I’m like, “Hmm, that seems odd, a doctor yelling at you in the exam room?” and oh yes, oh yes the were TOTALLY yelling and I try to confirm with “Wow, so, voice raised and stuff?” and eventually it comes out that no, not “yelling” if you mean it that way I guess. Don’t be so pedantic!
I mean, my mother has yelled at me. Ex-boyfriends have yelled at me. Librarians, doctors, cashiers, taxi cab drivers, friends, strangers in banks, and so on, those people have never “yelled” at me. Or I guess maybe they have, if I was so very misinformed and yell just means “to call someone on their bullshit”. Maybe that’s too much of a mouthful… “So my doctor totally called me on lying!”.
And I pit people who insist that anyone born into a family with a bit of money is a spolied brat who’s never had to work for anything. What’s the point in hating people for living an attractive lifestyle? Yah, it sucks that some people seem to get all the breaks without having to work for them. C’est la vie. Isn’t it much more efficient to, say, try and work your way to the top than sit around complaining about “some rich guy’s son” and his new car? You can’t control the circumstances your born into, whether they’re good or bad.b
I pit the bitch at the orthodontist’s office this morning who yakked all through the one good song that played as I was being tortured.
I got the chair under the speaker, and had to have two brackets repositioned and new wires on top and bottom. The bonding agent (I think that’s what it is) tastes vaguely of rancid vinegar, I had that thing in my mouth to hold my lips open and cotton padding in the sides of my mouth. The only redeeming moment was that a song I really like came on, my currrent “Oooh, My Favorite Song!” of the moment.
This bitch proceeded to talk all the way through it about how much she hated the song, hated the singer because he was ugly, hated how he sang it, and hated the video because it made no sense. By the time she finished her little rant, the song was over.
I hate you as much as you hate that song, bitch.
People who fail to check version numbers and then complain when they get ‘unexpected’ results. I’m getting a headache from not hitting my head on the desk. 