I am not personally a fan of diamonds. I absolutely despise the commercials and idea that buying someone a diamond is the way to make them love you. It’s not true, and it makes both parties out to be extremely shallow.
Personally though, should I ever get engaged, what I really want is for my guy to think for himself. I’m not about to suggest one way or the other what he should get me, because it’s supposed to be a gift from the heart - his heart. I know that whatever he gets for me, if anything, will be something that he thought about and that he put his effort and love into, and I’ll cherish it.
I don’t care if it’s a diamond, a lump of coal, a computer part, a stuffed duck, or just his own words. What I care about is that his choice comes from his heart. I ask no more and no less.
Well, I’m embarassed. Sorry, Lamia, I would love to know where to get it. About 1986 or 7, a male singer did a cover of it. 86, I think, Richard Thompson’s Daring Adventures had just come out. Ever since, I have had it in my head that it was Iggy Pop. Last night I did a search on Google, on Amazon, and on Rolling Stone and just could not find it. Either it was another singer, or it is no longer listed in his discographies. My bad.
For all you unmarried guys out there, this is a telltale indicator of a woman that is simply NFG. Run, do not walk, away from her…
When I got married I made the rings myself out of silver - my wife’s with an elaborate engraving that looks sort of like an infinity sign of two interwoven hearts. Very well received; and she gets compliments on it from everyone.
Personally, I don’t mind diamonds, and have a simple little pair of diamond earrings, and my engagement and wedding rings each have a small diamond. But none of them cost anybody two months salary. The earrings were an 18th birthday gift from my mom, who got them cheap by buying them from the estate jewlery section of a local jewelry store. The engagement/wedding set wasn’t terribly expensive (like I said, small diamonds), and were chosen not for the rocks but because they have this really nice etching of vines and flowers in black around the stones. Gives them a really nice antique-y look.
Personally, I’d rather have silver, with stones that are interesting and colorful, but diamonds are okay, too. So long as nobody’s paying full price for them. I’m not much for expensive jewelry. Especially from my husband; he doesn’t like expensive gifts and I see no reason why he should spend money on me if he won’t let me spend on him.
I’m with everyone else here who hates those ridiculous De Beers and other various jewelry store commercials. And you wanna know what kind of diamond jewelry I detest the most? Diamond clusters. Ugly, hideous things.
P.S. If this post makes little to no sense, I’m sorry. I’m suffering a really bad flu right now. I’m trying to be coherent, but it’s difficult when the letters on the screen keep moving.
Amen to that! Of course, as we speak, I’m wearing a gaudy-ass cocktail ring that used to be my mother’s (she’s still very much alive and well but gave her best jewelry to her daughters a couple of years ago, I think in an attempt to prevent any infighting after her death ). Some people think it looks like a daisy-o-diamonds, others think it looks like a snowflake, and my sister disdainfully calls it a wagon wheel. Friends have (gently) suggested dismantling the whole thing and making other, simpler pieces out of it. But I wouldn’t dream of it; ostentatious as it may be, it will forever remind me of my mother. I love her, and I love the ring, for sentimental reasons (even if I’d NEVAH! pick it out for myself).
Similarly (and similar to what catsix was saying), I’ll feel the same way about whatever my fiance chooses to give me as a symbol of our engagement. I love him, I’ll love whatever it is. It doesn’t have to be a diamond, and it doesn’t even have to be a ring. My current beau, however, is already blanching at the fact that I prefer white gold (he thinks it looks too much like silver, which everyone knows is cheaper than gold), and was appalled at my suggestion of a sapphire ring (because no way is he having everyone think that he was too cheap to buy me a diamond).
So what the hell…? I’ll take the diamond, and wear it proudly. Of course, it’s gonna have to be mighty big to compete with this cocktail ring over on my right hand…
I got white-knuckled angry over a series of these commercials that played on my drive to work the other day.
They came right out and said “she won’t know you love her unless you give her a diamond.” I mean gag. Step right up, boys! Love equals Cash! (Financing available… and that’s another thing. If someone ever went into debt to buy me some trinket I would smack them upside the head. I would thank them for the sentiment, then smack them upside the head. Financial solvency is a gift that keeps on giving)
And this other commerncial, was about how Mom is always keeping track of everyone, so Give Her a Diamond to Show Her You Care. Um… how about hiring a cleaning service for a few months so mom can catch a break? Or sending her out to a day spa for a massage or something?
deep breaths… fury abating… gettting hold of self…
And you have to oil them! I never knew that until we went looking for my engagement ring. I found a beautiful opal one, but the dealer told me it’s best to only wear opals occasionally since they’re so breakable. He recommended diamonds or sapphires since they’re the two hardest gems and would easily withstand everyday wear. I was really bummed, but ended up with a lovely diamond and sapphire band from 1890. It’s got teeny-tiny gemstones, just the way I like 'em. I don’t need to be cutting my drinking glasses in half when I wash them. (Although a wagon wheel of diamonds does sound intriguing . . . you could do a lot of damage with that.)
The ad where the husband exchanges the diamonds for the gift of Baby makes me gag. I’m sure his wife would be happy if old hubby would just change the gift’s diaper on a regular basis.
There was a great article in national Geographic a few months ago about diamonds. It really showed what a raquet the industry is. Your diamond will never again be worth what you paid for it. It’s unfortunate, but when it comes to matters of the heart, big business can’t help but rob their customers.
NOOOOOOOO kidding! I gotta be careful where I scratch in my sleep. But lemme tell you, if I’m ever attacked in a dark alley, the poor sucker doesn’t stand a chance.
I’m with you on that one. The first time I saw it I thought:
a) What is this, one o them black market babies? and
b) What was the mother thinking during labor? AAAAUUUUGGGHHHH! Get it out! Get it OOOOOOUUUUUT! There’s a diamond necklace in this for me!!!
Yes! It’s so freaking degrading. So, that’s her reward for bearing your child? She pops out a screaming infant and gets a shiny rock for the trouble? Dude, you’re not supposed to have to pay her off! Have the producers of these commercials never MET an actual woman, and just somehow assume we’re that easily bought?
And isn’t that the same commercial that has, “A little angel assured me you’d love this!” Yuck. Yuck, yuck, DOUBLE yuck. Makes me retch and vomit and retch s’more.
I’ve got nothing against diamonds on principle. Sure, they’re pretty rocks. But so are rubies and emeralds and garnets and malachite. What I hate is the whole presentation of diamonds as The Only Way to Prove Your Love. Man, if she doesn’t know you love her unless you spend a years’ salary on a great big diamond, you’ve got bigger problems than where to buy the ring.
You want to prove you love me? Put up with me when I’m in a foul mood, make me soup when I’m sick, and just be generally thoughtful. It’s pretty inexpensive.
I think diamonds are gorgeous. And I want more of them. I have beautiful sapphire and diamond earrings that I got for my wedding gift from my husband and I can’t wait to have a necklace to go with them.
I’m not going to pretend that I love them any less.
I did not know that. I’ll mention it to my sister to make sure she knows too, especially since she just got my grandmother’s opal ring as well. Bad juju in the works if that gets broken. Thanks DeskMonkey!
I do know of a couple women who, in fact, did get things “in exchange” for having another baby. However, since one involved a new (larger) house, I’m assuming it wasn’t so much a bribe as a “honey, if we have another baby, we have to get a bigger place to live” discussion. (The one who got a fur coat is another matter.)
I also know someone who insisted that her fiancé get her a large diamond engagement ring because she felt she had to measure up to a couple of her female friends in that respect. I’m one of those friends, and considering that my ring was an heirloom and certainly not something I’d have gone looking for otherwise, I found that kind of odd.
I don’t have a lowered regard for people who like precious gems or anything; I simply don’t like jewelry for myself at all, barring a very small number of sentimental pieces, and I prefer them to be more modest in terms of gems used. If Mr. Herder had gone out and bought me a huge diamond ring when we got engaged, I would have been mad that he put us into such debt and that after knowing me for five years he wouldn’t know better.
Commercials that imply/state that every woman requires lots of expensive rocks to know that you love her are disgusting.
Aside from the small diamonds in my small, extremely low-cost engagement ring, which I adore only because of what they signify, my first response to receiving pretty much ANY precious jewelry would be “Gee, that’s nice. Mind if I sell it? I’ve got my eye on a new G4…”
