I really only started this thread to pad my post count. How am i doing so far?
gosh, i haven’t posted in a reeaaallly long time, but i’ve been lurking for a coupla years now. I thought this would be a good time to rear my ugly head and say hello to all you Dopers. I am looking forward to being a productive member of the Doper society, and to adding posts that do more than just pad my count.
So hi everyone, I’m really glad to be here. 
Out of curiosity: after several years of lurking, what made you decide to join the ranks?
Well, I’ve always wanted to join the ranks. I sit at work every single day, reading the Dope, the articles, and the message board and I love it. However, I’ve been a lurker on a lot of boards, posting here and there and trying to nudge my way into the community. For whatever reason, I don’t really stick around for a long time on those boards, so I told myself that if I could lurk for at least a year faithfully, then it would be worth the membership fee. So, I lurked for, well, a long while before I decided that it was now or never.
This nonsense probably doesn’t make sense to smart humans because they see the Dope say to themselves “Wow! what a smart, intelligent, witty group of people, I can’t wait to sign up” I say, “Wow, what a smart, intelligent, witty group of people, I hope I can join them one day, but for now, I’ll just watch from a distance and let their genious wash over me. One day, I’ll be smart and intelligent too, and then I can join.”
Oh well, the smart intelligent thing didn’t really happen to me, but why keep myself from enjoying a great thing? That’s why I came out of lurkdom today.
And you still don’t know this is a no-no? 
Just wanted to say “howdy” before the lock down. 
Hopefully the mods will know the post count thing is a joke. And, well, if not, I’ll see them all in the pit, where I will have 6 or 7 posts. That oughtta show 'em.
Yeah, I’m going to continue on my quest to have participated in the most locked threads ever by saying “Hiya swanky!”
By the way, Hi Daithi Lacha, Harmless, and Hal, thanks for the howdys
So what is the record for fastest thread closure? Because this one has already gone on at least half an hour, which is surprising. It would have been cool to see a record set.
I wouldn
't ever resort
to pad
Can the mods change the title of my thread to something that doesn’t have anything to do w/ padding post counts? Like, Padding my shoulder pads? or perhaps, padding my orthopedic shoes?
Seriously, if I get locked out, I deserve it, but the post pad thing was meant as a joke and i’m not really padding my posts, or rather, i’m seriously not meaning to.
I hope you will all forgive me.
ding my
post count!!!
I believe you. I think the mods will show mercy.
Welcome to the boards! smooch
Woo-Hoo!!! Ride that locked thread!
lock and load vrrroooommmm!!!
Shoot, we don’t care…it’s the mods that get their nickers in a twist. 
So this is actually a Welcome Thread, right? Right?!
: nudge, nudge, wink, wink :
OmiGod,pleaseno…
After those Squcks… I just can’t handle anymore! flops down and collapses
What an unfortunate title for your thread, swanky_glue. I believes ya when you say it’s just a welcome back thread, but the title is misleading about a posting style we don’t encourage.
Sooooo… I’m gonna lock this one down. You’re more than welcome to start another thread joyously proclaiming your re-arrival. Just be sure to leave out references to verboten posting sins.