People, mostly older, who get peeved by…
That’s the problem. As a “mostly older” curmudgeon, I have to work so hard at not getting peeved at smaller and smaller things.
To tell the truth, it’s not the “no problem,” that bothers me as much as the, “yup,” which I was also guilty of abusing.
Here in the NW US, “no problem” has been in use for a few decades. I’m mid-50s and it is part of my lexicon. I don’t know why it would be problematic. Also, for those grousing about someone using your first name: Again, that is a thing in the NW from my experience. When I was very young we were taught to use “Mr” or “Ms/rs” but once I got to college age, first names all the way unless formal titles were called for (interviewing for a job for example). I think other parts of the US are far more formal with their “sirs” and “mr. so-and-so”, but not around these parts.
I think Kimstu hit the nail on the head, These “formulaic social phrases” do not have any real meaning in and of themselves other than that’s just what we do in these situations, For example, if someone says, “Hi, how are you doing?” the only acceptable response is “Fine, thank you.” or something similar. If you respond with how you are actually doing they will look at like you are some sort of [insert your favorite metaphor here].
It gets trickier when someone thanks you without explicitly saying “thank you!” (e.g. “much obliged!”). If you respond with “you’re welcome!”, it sounds like you’re passive-aggressively calling them out: “Oh, did you mean to say thank you, you inconsiderate jerk?” Instead, you’re better off responding with “no problem!” (or “anytime!”).
Meh.
I’m an mostly-older person who uses “no problem” as a polite formulaic response to “Thank you”.
Regardless of your age, if you get bent out of shape by my doing so, you will have proven to me that you don’t merit any real attempt at polite discourse and I will adjust my conversational register accordingly.
Try to lecture me? You’ll be ranting at my back
Judging from social media is rarely a good idea.
Speaking only for myself: I am an older person and I don’t care. And I’m not going to worry about anybody using my first name unless they don’t want me to use theirs.
But don’t call me six times in one sentence by the first name on my credit card. In addition to all the other things wrong with that, in my case that’s the wrong name, because I go by a version of my middle name and only use the first one for legal and banking purposes.
(I’m aware that most people doing this are only doing it because management says that they have to. So I don’t snarl at them.)
Whereas I get a whole lot less peeved at little things than I did when I was younger.
That’s actually context-dependent: depends both on the circumstances of the question and on who’s asking. A close friend, when I’m feeling awful, and we’ve both got a few minutes and there aren’t others probably listening? Yeah, I’m gonna tell them. Or the doctor/nurse at my appointment with them. But not the clerk at the checkout line, who at worst will get ‘Well, I’m still here!’ or something of that sort, in a fashion not expecting an answer.
Fair enough, that’s true in other contexts but this thread started out with the context of conversations with retail and service workers.
Also fair enough!
What does “you’re welcome” even mean? Welcome is a greeting or invitation. You’re welcome to what?
It means “no problem”.
My wife gets frustrated with me because I don’t always follow social conventions. For example, several years ago, we started going to a doctor that we had met socially prior to seeing him professionally. Even in his office setting I continued to call him by his first name, as that is how I met him. My wife says that I should call him Dr. _________, as that is his professional title. I refuse. He’s a person and I’m a person. We have a personal relationship.
I don’t know if it bothers him or not. If it does, he’s never said anything…not sure I would care if he did.
I was taught that it’s short for “you’re welcome to ask me for help again.”
I’ve been through a lot of that. My work involved working with doctors in and out of clinical roles, and then occasionally becoming a patient of a couple of them. So I might be talking to a colleague who is also a physician in my office at the hospital in the morning, and later that afternoon going to the physician medical wing in the hospital where I have to tell a receptionist I’m there to see Dr. Doctor, and then maybe a tech and nurse will refer to him as the doctor or Dr. Doctor, and then he’ll come in and I’ll say “Hi Danny”.
“You are welcome to [whatever it is that the person just thanked them for].”
Perfect!
Similar to my response when a cute young cashier asks for my phone number.
Would you call a guy who comes to fix your sink “Plumber Smith?”
No, but why Doctor Smith? Might it be that doctors are more full of themselves?
I heard someone at a party introduce themselves: “Hi, I’m Doctor Robert Mansard”. A couple of us looked askance at him, then at each other, and tried not to snicker.
.
eta: Omar (excuse me, Poster Little), you could compromise with your wife and switch to “Hey, Doc…”
No problemo.