Personal procedural rules

If I turn the oven on, or put something in it, I ALWAYS turn the oven light on! Even if it’s not on and I’m just putting the pizza and box in there to keep it from the dog! Light goes on!

This way I don’t discover the pizza a week later! :smack:

Or, accidentally leave the oven on! :smack:It works for me!

I sleep in as much as I can on my weekends because I have to get up early on my work days.

I keep my keys, change etc. by my bedroom stereo because I use it almost daily.

I always look down at my midriff before walking out the front door to make sure I’m clothed.

I go grocery shopping when I run out of my favorite beverages.

I use both a clock alarm and cellphone alarm to wake up for work because I found neither one alone 100% reliable.

I make sure all entry doors to the house are closed as quickly as possible to avoid house flies.

I check the same websites almost daily in the morning and evening.

I look at the wall calendar in the morning to check for appointments.

I place my regular footwear near the end of my bed.

I always keep my glasses near my bed at night.

I monitor my level of sleepiness about an hour before bedtime and take appropriate insomnia remedies.

I do most of my errands on my first day off and try to relax on my second.

One suggested by a cop: Keep the car registration in your wallet.

The registration needs to be in the car only while it is being driven - and, if it is being driven, you should have your wallet (or whatever holds your license).
The owner will always have the registration; a thief will not.

Makes the sop’s jobs a bit easier - they run the plate, find the owner’s name - and it ain’t the name of the person driving. Ummmm, howcome you’re driving this vehicle?

Dang! If only EVERYONE followed this one! :smack:

Here’s some backup, "How to Survive a Stampede,"for this practice. (NYTimes article, which may put you over your limit if you’re not a subscriber.)

Right off the bat it says:

I get in the car, lock the doors and put on my seat belt; then I start the engine.
I do this even if I am just moving the car around in my driveway.

Every outfit has at least one pocket into which goes the house key. I go in and out with the dog a great deal. Many years ago I locked myself out because I thought the door knob lock was disengaged.

When I go out I have two full sets of keys, one is in my coat pocket and one is in my purse.

If I go into the cellar (only access from outside bulkhead) I take the cell with me in my pocket. No one but the dog would hear me scream for help.

People often stop by my house when I am out doing yard work to ask for directions. I always ensure I am not close enough to the car to be grabbed when I speak with them. (warning from my mother)

I am always aware of my surrounding. I watch the reflection of what is behind me in the car windows when I am getting gasoline.

I have a small chalkboard in the kitchen. Before I go out I always note down where I am going and who I might be meeting. (Suggested by a friend who was concerned I live alone.)

I am certain I have more.

Hey after rereading this I sound paranoid:smack:

I am not paranoid these “rules” are so ingrained I do not think about them when I am doing.

I keep my jacket cut and slim and checked, maybe a touch of seersucker with an open neck.

I ride a GS scooter with my hair cut neat.

I wear my war time coat in the wind and sleet.

I pat my pockets for phone, keys, glasses and pens before I close the house door. This has its roots in the days when I smoked and patted pockets for ciggies and lighter before going ANYWHERE.

My Civic will not lock with the keys in ignition, no matter what. I make it a rule to lock with the keyfob always, so I know they are outside the car if they go missing. The tricky part is I have to get into the trunk at each stop for work, and I COULD lock the keys in there if I lay them down in there and slam the trunk closed. So my rule is I must have a visual on my keys before I shut the trunk.

I have a medication I take twice a day. I put the bottle cap up after I take the night dose and cap down after I take the morning dose. I always know whether I’ve taken it.

Mornings especially, I have meds to take and I need to feed and medicate my cats. I have a little ditty I sing to myself when it’s all done. If I’ve sung that to myself before I leave for the day I know we’re all set.

Keys have a hook next to the front door. If they’re not there, they’re in a designated pocket in my bag.

I use an organizer bag. I do NOT understand women who use those giant cavernous bags o’crap. I’ve yet to see anyone with those manage to find what they’re looking for without digging around and looking like fools. Everything has a place in my bag and everything gets put back in its place. No fussing, no fumbling, no looking like a disorganized flake.

Glasses live on my face unless I’m showering or sleeping. A shelf in the bathroom and a drawer in my nightstand, or my face and that’s it. Sunglasses have a case in my bag, and pairs get swapped out of the same hard case so when I’m out my regular glasses are either on my face or in the case, no where else possible.

Everything in the kitchen has a designated spot. I take something out to use, it gets put back in the spot it came from. Same at work save the areas that are shared, where, unfortunately, putting things back where they were found is apparently a feat only achieved by the most, well, nobody at all.

Procedures for everything. Everything I do requires pre-approval, from putting on my shoes to taking a six-week vacation in Hawaii. First, I fill out a requisition, in triplicate. I keep the white copy myself, and send the pink and yellow copies to my past self and future self, respectively. My past, present, and future selves schedule a conference, where a detailed agenda, a budget, and environmental impact report are hashed out. The proposal is examined in four dimensions for any contradictions with other actions, elsewhere or elsewhen, and these are noted. A committee is appointed to investigate whether there may be unintended consequences. If no objections are found, the proposal is approved and submitted for implementation. For very short-term projects (like putting on shoes), no periodic progress reports are required, but a final report shall be issued. For longer-term projects (like doing the laundry or going shopping), periodic progress reports are required every fifteen minutes. For longer projects (like the six-week vacation to Hawaii), daily reports are a must.

These reports are reviewed promptly by the past, present, and future selves, and an opinion is issued on the advisability of continuing the activity. If the opinion is favorable, the activity continues. If unfavorable, an urgent review is conducted to explore the advisability of abruptly discontinuing the activity, or whether any alternatives, such as a gradual disengagement, shall be preferred. Whatever course is decided upon, another opinion is issued for subsequent implementation.

Upon final completion or early termination of the activity, a final report is prepared, again in triplicate, and filed with past, present, and future selves, indexed by all relevant key words. This report shall be maintained in accessible format for a period of not less than twenty (20) years, and a summary is to be maintained thereafter indefinitely. This file shall be consulted as appropriate for all future proposed activities.

Your past, present and future selves must have had a real quick meeting to get that edit in, but it is refreshing to see that you use the requisition slips that so many people don’t even think about.

Look again, there was another edit that you missed. Posts to the Straight Dope Message Board can be composed in parallel with the deliberations of the past, present, and future selves, only requiring final approval before the “Submit” button is clicked.

I have to check all four walls and the ceiling for house centipedes prior to turning off the light at night. I had one drop down on my bare leg during a power outage one night about 5 years ago and it’s been a ritual ever since.

There must be a bath mat on the floor to use the shower, and absolutely no stepping on bare floor with wet feet after a shower. I knew someone who died due to a slip-and-fall while alone at home, hitting the back of her head exactly wrong on a hard low edge, and the bathroom seems like the perfect place for such an accident.

This, fer sure! Bath mat inside the tub or shower (unless you have that no-slip kind of tile), and mat or towel or rug on the floor outside the tub or shower. If you have bare linoleum or linoleum tile, that’s awfully slippery when wet or even just slightly damp.

We would get along. It’s just more enjoyable to sit down to eat, knowing there isn’t a huge mess waiting in the kitchen for you.

That’s okay, we know what you meant.

I see nothing here about an appropriate cover sheet. Your personal procedural rules are found to be lacking and your stapler will be removed.

I often read or take naps on a carpeted floor: I don’t really need a pillow to sleep. but when I’m the floor I place my glasses under nearby furniture so they can’t possibly get crushed.

I change oil in vehicles on 5000 mile multiples. Changing every 3000 as per oil change shops is excessive and 5K-10K-15K… is easy to note on the odometer.

Yeah, but we still have to nitpick.

<ThelmaLou plucks a dog hair off your shirt front.>

One I remembered just this morning: Whenever I am wearing a new pair of shoes for the first time, I always carry a spare pair of sneakers or other comfortable shoes just in case. I had a horrible blister incident a few years ago that I do not plan to repeat.