In the NYTimes magazine, March 25, there is a reference (on page 20) to “Philip Larkin’s famous poem – the best bits are unprintable here – about how parents mess up their children: ‘They may not mean to, but they do./They fill you with the faults they had/And add some extra just for you.’”
What is the poem?
This Be The Verse
by Philip Larkin
They fuck you up, your mum and dad
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.
But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another’s throats
Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don’t have any kids yourself.
A couple of essays to aid a comprehension of Larkin:
http://www-polisci.mit.edu/BostonReview/BR21.5/burt.html - on how he uses profanity
http://www.newcriterion.com/archive/summer99/philip.html - on his wider influences.