I asked a friend who owns a PhD in physics this question yesterday and got a totally unsatisfactory answer. My friend appears to know more math than physics and has spent his entire career in a computer science dept.
I have read in many places that a black hole has only three visible properties: mass, charge, and spin. My question is how do these appear? Charge, for example. Two electrons repel because a photon is emitted by one and carries momentum to the other one. An electron attracts a positron because, similarly a photon carries the opposite momentum in the same way (but how does it know which direction momentum to carry–subsidiary question). But a black hole cannot exchange a photon with an electron, so how is the charge mediated. (My friend’s answer: because there is an electric field–whatever that is.) Similarly, gravitational attraction is said to mediated by exchange of gravitons. Same question. And how is spin detected? I thought maybe the event horizon might be an ellipsoid, but no, my friend said it is always spherical.
I would like a qualitative explanation. Not because I fear equations, since I don’t, but I doubt that equations would explain anything.