Piano:pianist::cowbell:???

I saw the Christopher Walken skit on Saturday Night Live in which he “has a fever, and the only cure is more cowbell.” It’s where he’s the producer for The Blue Oyster Cult while they are recording “Don’t Fear the Reaper.”

Well, my friends and I are incredibly curious as to what someone who exclusively plays the cowbell would be called. I suppose that “percussionist” would work, but that’s usually reserved for someone who utilized multiple percussions, per se. I also suppose that someone who just plays the tamborine is called a tamborine man, so “Mr. Cowbell Man” isn’t out of the question.

I’m sure there’s some sort of entymology involved in creating a word to fit this description, if it doesn’t exist as of yet. I’m curious as to how to find this out.

Cowbellophonist? Cowbeller? Cowbellist? Cowbellina?

Dork?

The first thing I thought of was cowbelly. Or dweeb.

Unemployed.

Cowbeller shows up 10 times in Google (though many of these sites are from the Bahamas), but cowbellist only 5.

Bovotintinnabulator?

Oh, that’s got to be worth something, y’all.

::applauds::

piano:pianist::cowbell:cow

No?

percussionist?

The second disc of the live album GRATEFUL DEAD AT FILLMORE EAST, 2/11/69, entitled “Late Show,” includes this bit of on-stage patter as it opens:

(Producer Bill Graham has just been presented with the gift of a cowbell he played with the band during a show in San Francisco earlier in the year)

Graham, at microphone: “…it has always been my lifetime ambition to become the greatest cowbell player in the world…”

Jerry Garcia, at back of stage: “Give up.”

vacca-campanologist?

Don’t be sexist… you have to include bovotintinnabulatrix as well.

Virginia?

sorry!

According to AllWords.com, “cowbell” is also a plant “having white flowers with an inflated calyx” (oooh, sexy!) AKA the bladder campion.

A Bladdercampionist?

Thank you, thank you.

How about:

“The worst percussionist in the band”?

Good god. Acquiring THAT nickname would be grounds for suicide.

Jersy Jingler
Angus Annoyer
Moo Tan Clanger

Linda McCartney?

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have a winner!

I just wanted you all to know that last night I dreamed I had a twelve-inch bovotintinnabulator.