It’s been a while since I posted any of these…
I’m still reading assessment essays so that incoming college students can be placed into English or ESL classes. My fellow readers and I have collected some more “gems”–oddities, fractured sentences, funny stuff, and more.
The latest ones are listed below. Enjoy!
Just complimenting a friend’s ugly sweater forces us to put on a face and train of thought that is not our own.
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She is a self-fish woman.
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I like to read science fiction and fantasy books because they require a lot more imagination than a story set in our lame society.
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The way I see it, happiness means nothing if your dead.
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I got sick of her balogna and naturally defended myself.
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I believe spending money on the necessities is the most important thing that people should spend their money on because I wouldn’t want to live on a planet without anybody on it.
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Through the ages humans have evolved drastically.
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Money is not powerful, but we can’t don’t have money.
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Clothing is very important. Because you can’t go around naked.
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No child has ever said, “When I grow up I want to be a whithered old man who takes antidepressants.”
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Happiness is sometimes a cookie before you go to bed and sometimes it’s an orgasm with whoever might be your partner at the time.
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Lisa. Lisa. Lisa. Her name gave me craves to pummel her into oblivion.
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Socialization will always cause conflict among individuals because people have different sets of minds and different amount of testosterone secretion.
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I’m a hectic mother.
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He’s a bit strange because he teaches art and football.
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Money should not be wasted on alcohol, drugs, or weapons unless it’s necessary.
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They start eating baby food, little spoons, stroller, crib etc. the list goes on.
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Money can’t buy you love or happiness, but only bad friends and depression.
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This feeling of independence in a place so far from home should bring a smile wider than a human’s intestines all layed out.
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I want to donate my body to science fiction.
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Spend money on your family because you live on after you die in your family.
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Many people say that getting a massage, abusing drugs, or having intercourse is the best way to relax, but I would like to differ.
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I have been to many places and this world is full of it.
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Relaxation is the key to live long, healthy and lastly not going bald.
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Tennis will always be my favorite activity to relieve myself.
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In more ways than one, television controls everyone, unless you’re a nudist naturist named Advocado.
And in case you missed the ones from previous years:
Here is the last such thread I posted.
