Please critique my resume

Mods if this is not the correct forum, please move.

I have a Job Fair to attend tomrrow, and was unable to find my resume, teeming masses please critique this one for me

Objective To obtain a position with a growth oriented company in their Information Technology department
Employment 01/01/2000-08/17/01 ] MicroWarehouse Lakewood, New Jersey
Technical Support-DataComm Warehouse division
• Duties included, support the inbound and outbound sales staff by providing them the correct solution for the customers needs. Other duties, training sales staff on the products we sold, answering questions customers had about our products and providing, configuration and troubleshooting assistance to our customers on products they purchased from us
• 08/15/1994-12/31/1999 MicroWarehouse Lakewood, New Jersey
Inbound sales-DataComm Warehouse
Duties Included, Handling incoming calls generated from our catalog as well as customers placing orders generated by the Outbound Sales Force. On an average call I had to determine the needs of the customer, determine which products would be appropriate based on their budget and performance, close the sale, and follow up on the processing of the order.

Accreditations I currently hold the following certifications. Hewlett Packard Star certified, Microsoft MCSE Windows NT 4.0 Track, 3COM Wizard certification and am attending classes on Windows 2000. Furthermore I have been trained by Orinoco on their wireless products and have a strong background in computer networking. I have a test lab at home consisting of one FreeBSD system, two Windows 2000 Professional systems, one Windows 2000 Server and lastly a Windows 98 workstation. I will be adding a Windows XP system to this network upon it’s release

Most resume books will tell you that “I” is not a good word to use in your resume, on the reasoning that anyone reading the resume can probably deduce who you’re talking about. Also, taking out “I” will give your resume the extra kind of chilly, professional air that employers respect.

I would change:

Objective To obtain a position with a growth oriented company in their Information Technology department
to:

Objective: A position with a growth-oriented company in their Information Technology department

the reason being, your objective is what you want, and what you want is the job, not the act of obtaining the job. A subtle difference, I admit, but an important one, IMO.

I’d skip saying “duties included” because this is obvious, especially if you are in need of space. Instead, start off each line with a good,strong action verbs "Initiated, Conducted, Introduced, Performed…

Use the present tense for your current position, however.
Initates, conducts, introduces, performs…

Good luck!
-Jinx

This is what I’d do with it

Objective: An Information Technology position with a growth-oriented company.

01/01/2000-08/17/01 MicroWarehouse Lakewood, New Jersey
Technical Support-DataComm Warehouse division
-supported inbound and outbound sales staff
-trained sales staff in product information
-assisted customers requiring assistance
-provided configuration and troubleshooting assistance to customers

08/15/1994-12/31/1999 MicroWarehouse Lakewood, New Jersey
Inbound sales-DataComm Warehouse
-Handled incoming sales calls generated through catalog and Outbound Sales Force*(I’m struggling with this-maybe split it into 2 parts??)*
-Assisted customers with product selection as determined by budget and performance
-Tracked orders once placed to ensure order was properly processed

Accreditations:
Hewlett Packard Star certified, Microsoft MCSE Windows NT 4.0 Track, 3COM Wizard certification. Currently attending classes on Windows 2000.
Additional Information:
Received training from Orinoco for wireless products.
Strong background in computer networking.
Home test lab consists of of one FreeBSD system, two Windows 2000 Professional systems, one Windows 2000 Server and a Windows 98 workstation. Windows XP to be added upon release.

There are some great resume sites on the web. It is prolly too late for tomorrow, but you may want to try http://jobstar.org/tools/resume/index.htm

It has some tips on interviewing, too, IIRC.

Good luck!

for god’s sake, put it on a nice piece of off-white paper! Linen is good…

If I were considering you for my organization (my fictional organization mind you) and were looking at your resume as it’s laid out above, I would be curious to know why you listed MicroWarehouse Lakewood as your employer twice. I see that your position within MicroWarehouse Lakewood changed, but there is no need to list the employer twice, as if it were two seperate companies. It caused a bit of confusion.
Also…details, details, details. Your certifications are impressive and, going by your job duties desciption, make you appear to be overqualified for that position. Listing things like “assisted customers requiring assistance” and “provided configuration and troubleshooting assistance to customers” are too vague. Be specific. Your prospective employer wants specifics. Instead of saying “provided configuration and troubleshooting assistance to customers”, say something like “Successfully isolated and corrected multiple OSI layer 3 router addressing problems within a class B, 500 host client-server environment, saving the customer $15500.00.”
Use positive buzzwords like “successfully” and “consistently”. And if your work had a positive financial impact for the company, list it. If you skills as an IT tech resulted in saving money for the company, list it. If you made, or had input on, any decisions about hardware or software purchases that increased productivity for the company, list it.
Also, rather that just list the operating systems that reside on your home network, go into a little detail about how it is configured. Is it a peer-to-peer setup? Client-server? What physical media did you incorporate? CAT5 UTP? Fiber? Did you implement any layer 2 devices (hubs, bridges, switches)? Any layer 3 devices? Did you set up multiple user accounts with different permissions to various areas of the network? Any printers, scanners, or other peripherals attached? What topology did you implement?

The above examples are more CCNA, CCNP related, rather than MCSE but I’m sure you get the point.

Remember, details are good, but too many details i.e. getting too technical, can cross the line into the realm of fluff and BS, even if your being completely truthful.

The bottom line is that you want your resume to say, “These are my accomplishments and contributions…and, yes, they are impressive because they reflect my positive work ethic.”

Good luck to you.