I was simply pointing that not everybody who disagrees with gay marriage hates gays.
You don’t know the people I’m talking about so don’t go judging them with ‘they don’t read anything deeper than People Magazine’.
The word ‘marriage’ carries a definition for them and that is what they believe. If you wanted to call it ‘gayrriage’ they would be all for it. So no matter what YOU think, you don’t know them or what they think, you just want to believe that anybody against gay marriage is an evil Republican.
Guess what… they aren’t all evil and they aren’t all Republicans.
Actions speak louder than words. Let’s see some of these people advocating for this position. I put it to you that they are assholes who don’t want anyone to know they are assholes and have decided that claiming marriage is something sooper speshul only for heteros relieves the pressure. Tell them to put their money where their mouths are and carry a sign saying equal rights for lgbt. Let’s see them write a letter to the editor against constitutional amendments negating or restricting civil unions. Stop making excuses for bigots.
This has been debated numerous times on these boards, and I don’t think that being against gay marriage is the same as stoning gay people to death. But saying that “marriage” is special, and gay relationships aren’t good enough for it, is bigoted.
I’ll tell you what… let them sit down for coffee with one of their many gay friends, and listen to the story of their long time partner’s death, and how difficult it was to be allowed in the hospital room because their relationship wasn’t legally recognized*.
At that point, I invite your family/friends to explain how important the definition of a word is to their lives. They can point out how much that word means to them, how much a slight change in definition would affect them personally. (frankly, this has been asked a few times on the boards, and I haven’t seen squat in terms of an argument that a change in definition would impact anyone on a personal level)
As much as they probably think they like gay people, and only want the best for them, their position harms gay people directly. If you put the time in, you could gather thousands of similar sad stories that would have been very different if some people placed a little less importance on etymology, and a little more on empathy.
*real conversation, in my dining room, not a happy day
In church yesterday, the all too familiar gospel reading where a scribe asked Jesus what is the greatest commandment of all…and Jesus responded that it was to love God with all your heart, soul, strength and mind (paraphrasing of course), and then the next greatest commandment was to love your neighbor as yourself.
I can’t see why any person of faith would want (or allow) to withhold the rights of another to love whoever they want. That is not love of neighbor.
The timing was not lost on me (and others) that this was the gospel reading before election day. The priest did not harp on who to vote on (all though he did mention that we as Catholics should vote yes on CA Prop 34), but he stressed heavily on the fact for every citizen to fulfill their obligation to vote.
The lesson…not all religious people feel the need to keep the gayfolk down.
Someone on my facebook just stuck up a similar post- an ‘If anyone is voting for Romney, please remove yourself from my friends list, we have nothing in common’ post.
I know various friends or relations of mine on Facebook who are likely to vote for Romney, but I only unfriended one person in order to stop myself from posting something really nasty in response to one of their posts.
Basically they and their other friends were discussing a protest by nurses and police over pension cuts, characterizing them as “whiners” who needed to “learn what it’s like to do a real job” and “contribute more to society”, while in the same thread the same people were joking about how much rich housewives (which most of them are) contribute to the economy. I hope you appreciate my restraint.
I agree.. as a black dude I’m always kind of cross eyed when the issues involving gay and lesbians are equated to traditional african american civil rights.. but on this i see the author point (disagree with the OP)
I couldn’t go along with you if you concurred with segregation.. You might be a great guy and all.. and might even be willing to cut me a break.. but no.. some issues some votes are indefensible when we’re discussing another citizens rights..
Maybe because they are older, and have been devout Christians their entire lives and while they have nothing against what other people do they still can’t wrap their heads around ‘marriage’ meaning anything other than ‘one man/one woman’.
They would totally emphasize with your situation, they totally agree that you should have all the same rights, but in their mind marriage means what it has always meant and they aren’t going to change their minds.
It doesn’t mean they hate you or what you do, they don’t judge you, there’s nothing homophobic about it.
In their eyes marriage is a Sacrament and shouldn’t be messed with.
I don’t agree with them, but I understand where they are coming from.
If the “friends” you have on FB have such fundamentally different views than you do, they are likely not actual “friends” at all. Maybe you went to H.S. together, or maybe they are work acquaintances, or spouses of friends.
I was prodded into creating a FB account (not in the really early days, but before it became a default). I found lots of people I know, and they were now “friends” and we shared anything and everything. IMO, remembering someone from 15 years ago doesn’t make you “friends”, just past acquaintances.
When Google+ came out, I quit FB and joined it (feel free to mock me if it makes you feel better).
I told everyone on FB (that wasn’t ignoring me) that I was leaving, and gave contact info that those who might care could use.
When people asked in horror why I would ever quit FB, I usually said "That’s why I quit FB. The fact that my leaving this social network elicits a response on par with me selling kids on the black market, means something is seriously wrong with the perception that being on FB is almost mandatory.
Now I have a group of actual friends on G+, actually I have several groups there. True, there isn’t as much activity as FB had, but that’s kinda the point. I haven’t had to de-friend a single person based on partisan bias, maybe that’s because I only talk to my true friends now (not that I don’t have a few that think differently than I).
Guess what? I have a lot of gay friends who voted for Romney and supported him ardently. They believe in equality for gays in all ways.
Not going to de-friend anyone just because of the way they vote. And frankly, if you’d de-friend me because of the way I might vote, then just de-friend me right now.
People who disagree with you can only change if they are exposed to your life, your ideas, your point of view. Very few will probably ever change too much but some can. I’ve seen it. Distancing yourself from those you disagree with only serves to insulate them further from the possibility of change.