IIRC, TokyoPlayer’s wife already believes this (“Fan Death” is a popular myth in Korea and Japan.) Which is why I would suggest to her that Western culture dictates that a pregnant woman should ALWAYS fall asleep with a fan blowing on her, so that the oxygen is “blown into” the fetus and it becomes very strong.
While your wife is pregnant, you should say, “Yes, Mama.” to her a lot.
It encourages filial obedience in the developing fetus. 
P.S. Make fun of. Poke fun at.
Going to a sporting event that requires paying at least $50 for tickets every month during the pregnancy will keep the kid from becoming autistic.
Sounds more like “if you want to get killed.”
The following gem was recently on TV and involved several high-ranking Spanish government officers. Rephrased: “it has not been proven that working with a computer or a photocopier is safe for a pregnant woman, therefore women should refrain from any activity involving such.” I suggest not telling this to a pregnant gamer unless you feel like finding out what a controllerfull of teeth tastes like.
Until the kid goes through the Stick Pointy Metallic Item Into Socket Plug ceremony. That puts the spark(le) back in them all right.
This is good. I’ll make her sit through a K1 fight.
What? Oh, yeah, because kids with polio are much sparklier.
Really good home-cooked gourmet meals are more nutritious for the young’un to be, and should be made very day.
If you polish up the stainless steel on the braces.
A pregnant wouman should perform oral sex on her husband every day or the baby will be stupid and ugly.
She should eat plenty of frozen waffles.
That way the kid will be prepared to teethe on them.
Good, good, good. Keep them cumming.
A pregnant woman should never use the word ‘no’ as it creates a negative envrionment for the baby.
Developing babies can sense negativity, so an expectant mother should refrain from disagreement about anything, as that would cause stress to the unborn child.
Expectant fathers should drink several beers every night to build up their biceps for lifting the child, this relieving the mother of having to carry the baby.
Also, men should never handle dirty diapers because too much exposure to urine and fecal matter causes low sperm count. It’s a closely guarded secret that municipal sewer workers have some of the lowerst sperm counts in America.
Flirting with pretty women during his wife’s pregnancy helps the expectant father bond with the baby after birth; the more flirting, the better the bonding.
Finally, long hours spent playing video and computer games helps fathers-to-be gain the dexterity they need to keep up with the little tyke when he/she becomes mobile
Expectant mothers should not read; it will cause the baby to need glasses from eye strain.
Car rides are very traumatic for unborn children. If the distance is less than 4 blocks, the mother should walk. If she must ride, her hands should be by her sides at all times, she should be as quiet as possible (so as not to traumatize the child further) and under no circumstances should she ever touch the radio, lest the sound waves affect the baby.
Madge the Beautician was right all along; womens (and baby’s ) hands get softer if they soak in dishwashing liquid. Say for about 20 minutes every night between 6 and 7 pm.
The most perfectly balanced meal for the mother of an unborn child is either garlic-and-onion spiced Haggis or fresh liver. Both should always be garnished with lime jello, which might help fight calcium deficiency in later years…
The best way to deal with postpartum depression is to soundproof the gararge.
More silliness from Taiwan.
According to my wife, she can’t go to her friend’s wedding, because being in a “congratulatory” time will interfere with the “congratulatoryness” of the bride, but because the bride’s congratulatoryness of the bride is stronger, the baby will suffer.