PMS: Nobody's Friend

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

You know, I pride myself on being an atypical woman. I’m handy around the house, can fix things, am not afraid to walk out alone after dark, am confident and not worried about my weight or generally how I look.

I take pride in my pragmatism, my logical bent and the fact that I don’t generally wear rose-colored glasses.

:sigh:

I used to take some kind of twisted pride that I didn’t turn into one of the Jerry Springer horror stories with PMS. Irritable? Sure, a little. However, yesterday’s little episode has left me deflated. You see, the Hormone Fairy visited [sub]Related on her mom’s side to the Booby Fairy that visits during pregnancy.[/sub]

Everything in my life was wrong. [sub]not[/sub] I was in the throes of mental anguish on every decision I’d made over the past 2 years. I was going to do something to really screw up the very good life I have. Everything was horrible, HORRIBLE! My life was a dead-end street and there was no hope in my future. I was in the[sub] /Albino voice/[/sub] Pit of Despaaaaiiiiiirrr [sub]/Albino/[/sub].

I was painting the kitchen cabinets last night and sat on the floor crying, cause I was so miserable. Thank god my husband wasn’t home to see that little episode. :rolleyes:

I wrote him this long, weepy note trying to explain how I felt and apologizing for not doing better managing our finances, on and on ad nauseum.

Feh.

Today, everything is better. The sun is shining, I fixed the toilet (leaked at the bottom - installed new wax ring), our finances are stable (not great but stable), I’m looking forward to ChiDope (big time!), la de da de da.

Mein gott, this hormone thing sucks sometimes! I can say this is the first time I can remember really being able to tie in an emotional “breakdown” to that time of the month. Weird. Thank God above it doesn’t happen every month. That’d be like expecting the devil for an overnight visit every month.

Ladies, anyone else have PMS stories to share?

2

Bunny, you’ve got a good life, remember that. I wish there were more I could say, but you seem to have come back around. Good job on the toilet!

<backing out, careful not to get any “Hormone Fairy” dust on him>

~

3

ts, you come through again.

Your post made me laugh on so many levels. :stuck_out_tongue:

:giggle furiously:

Y-chromosome=cross, indeed! :smiley:

4

From hundreds of miles away, it’s easy to help, little one :slight_smile:

Go hit the suana or grab a margarita or some such relaxing thing. Think good thoughts.

5

BunnyGirl, in my younger days I very seldom had PMS. Then a couple of years ago, I dropped a ton of weight, I hit my mid-30s, my libido got out of control, as did my PMS. I was crying a lot for no apparent reason, I was even more bitchy and moody than my normal prickly self, and this was worst the week before and during. I switched birth control pills to a different brand, and my PMS pretty much vanished. The libido did not.

6

Girlfriend, you think you’ve got problems.

I haven’t even started my period yet. When did everyone else’s start, around twelve or thirteen? Shit, I’m 31 and have yet to feel any of my eggs drop.

And don’t even get me started on my tits. No jog bra for me, no. These things are flat as pancakes. And kinda fuzzy now that I look.

And my hips. I ain’t gonna be birthin’ no babies with these things. No siree.

You just count your blessings, hon.

7

Bwahahaaahaaaaa :cough, snort, giggle:

Good lord, Strainger, warn me next time, eh? I see you talking in this Nathan Lane The Birdcage voice!

ts, yes there is a very large glass of white wine in this little Bunny’s future. Too hot for Dad’s sauna though.

porc, hey, I’m all for libido, baby! :smiley:

8

I LOVE my PMS! I revel in it! I roll around in it and fling it at hapless passers-by!

[sub]oh, you do not. shut up, liar.[/sub]

My PMS and I have grown quite close over the years. We’re friends. We share all our deepest, darkest secrets. My PMS knows things about me that even the SDMB doesn’t know.

[sub]yeah, like how you lied to your kids and told them there weren’t any more Chocolate Creme Oreos, just so you could have them all to your PMSing, gullet-stuffing, lazy-assed self.[/sub]

Sweet, sweet PMS. It is as much a part of me as the hands I use to type this post.

[sub]…as much a part of you as those disgusting zits you had? you know, the ones that were so horrifying that you actually called in sick to work?[/sub]

I love to just sit around the house with my PMS, drinking pink wine and getting lost in my hormonal glory.

[sub]oh, you mean like you got lost on the way to the grocery store last time I glorified you? heh.[/sub]

Ahhh, yes, PMS is my friend. My very best friend.

[sub]am not. bitch. now give me those cookies before I kick your ass.[/sub]

9

But still quite shapely by my way of thinking.

Sorry Pers. I already ate all the damn cookies.

10

I hate crying in general, but particularly in front of others. Usually, I can keep tears at bay, but when I’m alone and the hormone fairy is visiting…Has anyone seen “The Mighty”? I read the books last summer (I was working with school-age kids then) so I rented it last month. I cried through the entire thing, even at the not-so-sad parts. I try not to watch e.r. or nature specials then. “Oh, the poor baby monkey fell out of the tree and died, it’s…it’s so sad!” <eyes over flow with tears> At least I can get a grip when there are other people in the room :slight_smile:

11

Ah, PMS. I get PMS. Oh, do I get PMS.

I tend to piss EVERYone off during that time AND get really depressed. Or irritable. Or very very bubbly. Or fuzzy. Regardless, I scare people.

But picture this. I go to an all-girls high school and we all get PMS right around the same time. Roughly 170 teenage girls all riding the mood swings. I pity our teachers.

12

We went to see Pearl Harbor a couple days before my monthly friend visited. We were sitting there, watching this horrid movie, bored senseless, praying for it to end. Then the Japanese attacked. I just sat there and started thinking about the horror of war, and man killing man, and how violence shouldn’t be the solution, and oh, dear God, why can’t we all just get along!? And I started weeping. During Pearl Harbor, fer crying out loud! That Hormone Fairy is fairly elusive, but if I ever find her, the bitch is going to pay for that one.

My other problem at that time is chocolate. Last month, I had the craving at work. I had to have a Butterfinger[sub]TM[/sub] bar. The only thing that mattered in my life was a Butterfinger[sub]TM[/sub] bar. And I went to the vending machine with my dollar bill. And there was no Butterfinger[sub]TM[/sub] bar! And I vowed that day that if I ever find the bastard who ate that last bar (and you just know it was a man, right ladies?), he will regret the day that he ever touched the last Butterfinger[sub]TM[/sub] bar!

So, yeah, when it comes to PMS, I know whereof I speak.

13

PMS? What PMS? aaaaaahhhh, you mean the 23 days between my 5-day period?

14

In general, PMS doesn’t mess with me emotionally. I don’t get bitchy or more sensitive or anything. In general. I also don’t get my period every month anymore. I used to. You could set a clock by my regularity. Then something happened (no idea what) and I stopped getting it. Every 6-8 months or so, I do. I just did. And it was horrible. Absolute hell like I couldn’t imagine. I cried for 5 days straight and couldn’t figure out why. I’d go from periods of total despair to fits of rage for no reason. It was insane. I was miserable, my family was miserable, everyone around me was miserable. I really hope that never happens again.

15

Ah… I know PMS all to well. My Sisters and I are triplets, so we were all PMSing at the same time(My parents must have been saints), and the screaming fights that arose from our house used to get the neighbors calling to see if everything was okay. They thought someone was getting murdered or something.
Also, I get extremely weepy. I cried while watching the Simpsons last night, when the kids get sent to the Flanders’ as Foster Children. It was really embarassing. The sad thing is that stuff like that happens all the time.:frowning:

16

PMS is not my friend. Not even a friend of a friend. It’s god’s way of making me PAY, using my own beloved as his secret weapon of ultimate doom! Ooooh, the horror!

17

My worst PMS moment was crying in a mall because I couldn’t find burgundy shoes. (I was really embarassed the next day when I returned to normal.)

Frankly - I’m looking forward to menopause.

18

When I have PMS, the bearer of a Y-chromosome can make me cross, indeed.

19

Oh, Persephone. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I am currently hiding in my office because PMS is causing me to want to maim, mangle or otherwise destroy various coworkers. Or at the very least, to say really impolite things. Which they would deserve. And you made me laugh out loud. Thank you!

20

vix: You…laughed?

sob

Great. This is JUUUUUST great. Is anyone else laughing at me? Are they pointing too?

[sub]PMS Paranoia. It’s a beautiful thing.[/sub]