Lots of song so far I wouldn’t call pretentious at all.
I will go with Kenny Rogers’s The Gambler because it attempts to be oh-so-philosophical.
And, of course, the King of Pretention: Stephen Sondheim.
Led Zeppelin - Stairway to Heaven.
I’d go as far to say that almost any song dealing with Celtic mythology is the height of pretension.
Beautiful by Christina Aggleaggle.
I’m pretty sure she made this song to capitalize on the current popularity of homosexuality, just like she made her Spanish album to capitalize on the latest Hispanic fad.
Most pretentious metal song ever:“Alexander The Great” By Iron Maiden. THAT was sillier than anything Spinal Tap ever came up with.
But why? The song was just written as another track on the album. It was never intended to become a pop hit (like the other songs listed here), nor was it ever released as a single. The cult phenominon happened on its own. Robert Plant, the guy who wrote the song, doesn’t even like it anymore! The band never wanted have that song become the lasting memory of them, it just happened that way.
Now if you were to argue the same thing about Kashmir, I may not be able to argue quite as much, though I still love the song…
Please pretend that actually makes sense… :smack:
Pretty much anything Rick Wakeman put his hand to.
Even if I like Yes, I have to mention the whole Tales From Topographic Oceans. I do like it but man, is it pretentious.
Which song is it that goes “In the year 2525, blah blah blah mankind is still alive”? That’s gotta be in the Top 10. My other nominee would be Europe’s The Final Countdown.
Oh yes, Imagine by John Lennon takes the cake. Here’s a guy living in a multi-million dollar penthouse overlooking Central Park, doing little else than smoking dope and screwing his freaky little wife, lamenting the ills of materialism and capitalism.
Second place goes to Michael “Tommy Mottola is a racist because my album sales have declined” Jackson and Paul McCartney for their putrid heap of pretention: Ebony and Ivory. (Gosh, that’s two pretentious awards for former Beatles :)) What makes it even more pretentious is that these two proponents of world harmony aren’t on speaking terms anymore because the former outbid the latter to win ownership of the Beatles catalog.
Clearly neither took John’s sage advice to Imagine a world with no possessions.
Um, didn’t McCartney collaborate with Stevie Wonder on “Ebony and Ivory”? You might be thinking of McCartney and Michael Jackson’s collaboration on an even more insipid song: “The Girl Is Mine.”
Ah, you’re not familiar with Green Carnation. Light of Day, Day of Darkness, clocking in at just over an hour (no track breaks), is clearly the most pretentious song of all time.
It’s also the most brilliant thing I’ve ever heard, but there’s no reason to say it’s not pretentious.
I don’t think anyone is using “pretentious” right in this thread. Pretentious means acting “deeper,” more highbrow, and more intellectual or profound than you actually are. Many of these songs are schmaltzy, melodramatic, or just plain bad, but pretentious is an entirely different category.
I vote for Radiohead’s entire career, specifically “Ok Computer”-onward.
And for the record, Jimmy Webb wrote “MacArthur Park.” While it may be a terrible, melodramatic song, there’s nothing even remotely intellectual or pretentious about it.
Billy Joel has to be LAMBASTED a lot MORE in this thread, sorry to all his fans, but he does. Cases in point:
ALLENTOWN. SO self-consciously TOPICAL.
The song about Vietnam. If you weren’t there, DON’T WRITE A SONG ABOUT IT.
We didn’t start the fire. Already mentioned but bears repeating.
And finally, there is some song by Billy Joel where one line ends “and now you par-ley-vous Fran-say”, don’t know the title. Ugh.
That song “Christie Lee” and all the rest of those songs he wrote when they were dating.
Seconded.
Stole by Kelly Rowland. Tacky, trite and oh-so pretentious. Crappiest song ever. I HATE that song!!!
RobertaPlant
Agreed about “Goodnight Saigon” by Billy Joel. Billy Joel, born May 9, 1949 certainly could have served in Vietnam, but didn’t. So, might as well write a song about it.
Charlie Daniels sings “Still In Saigon” (he did not write it though). However, he certainly creates the impression that the song is his personal experience. In reality, he never served a day in any branch of the military.
Oh. You mean like Emerson Lake and Palmer.
Sometimes When We Touch by Dan Hill
You ask me if I love you and
I choke on my reply.
I’d rather hurt you honestly
Than mislead you with a lie.
And who am I to judge you
On what you say or do?
I’m only just beginning
To see the real you.
And sometimes when we touch,
The honesty’s too much,
And I have to close my eyes and hide.
I wanna hold you till I die,
Till we both break down and cry.
I wanna hold you till the fear in me subsides.
similar vein for far, far too long