My stalker is back, and my son has bonded with him. AITA for still not trusting my stalker, even though he seems different, and even protected my son from my son’s stalker.
Well, he did promise he would be.
I suggested that we go to Hawaii for vacation, but my dad insisted on driving us halfway across the country to a theme park in California. He even bought this god awful ugly station wagon for the trip. The trip was a complete disaster. Although my cousin showed me his collection of porno magazines when we stopped by his family’s farm along the way, so there’s that. I just want to go home, preferably by plane. AITA?
Just wait until you go to Europe, kid.
My friends and I were on the playground one cold day, when we got into an argument over whether your tongue would get stuck to the flagpole if you were to lick it. My friend said I was full of bologna when I said it would stick. So I double dog dared him to do it if he was so sure, which was a slight breech of playground etiquette. Wouldn’t you know it, his tongue actually froze to the flagpole. AITA?
I kept dropping hints all season that I wanted a BB gun for Christmas, but my everyone told me I’d shoot my eye out. Well my old man actually got me one (he said it was from Santa, but I knew it was him). When I went out to the backyard to try it out, the BB ricocheted off something and actually shot my eye out! And broke my glasses, too. I didn’t want to suffer the indignity of proving everyone right, so I told a little fib and said it was an icicle. AITA?
Well played.
ETA. Coffee is for closers!
So I’m in high school and there is this really annoying little geek who is always showing up wherever I am and doing stuff to irritate me, deliberately I’m sure. Once I asked him to help me with my homework, and he almost fails to get it to me in time, just to get me in trouble. Then one day his even more annoying friend shows up and starts getting in my way too. Once I was just talking to this guy and out of the blue he punches me in the face. WTF was that? Then he gets me into a car accident and almost wrecks my car. I just want to get even with those guys. AITA?
Things got pretty bad for my mother and me after my father died. All we had was a rundown house and a small motel that didn’t have much business after the new road opened outside of town. I had a lot of spare time to devote to my taxidermy hobby. Then one night a woman checked in. She seemed nice, but my mother thought she was up to something. Then I saw her prancing around in the shower naked, and I realized mother was right. So I put a stop to it right then and there. Now there are people snooping around, asking questions. AITA?
I’m working in IT for an up-and-coming animal amusement park. My millionaire employee has spent a fortune on the technology needed to bring these animals to life, but he insists on running it with a staff that can be charitably described as a skeleton crew.
I designed the security system that keeps the dangerous animals in their pens, and I also designed the power systems and the track that keeps the park’s automated Jeeps moving from exhibit to exhibit.
I did this for a salary barely above minimum wage, I’m one of only two members of the entire IT department, and on top of that, I get constant insults and disrespect from not only my boss but the entire staff, on account of my financial situation and the fact that I’ve got a bit of a weight problem.
A man came to me in secret and offered me a great sum of money to commit industrial espionage against the company I’m working for, smuggling embryos of the animals out of the park. It’s more money than I’ve ever dreamed of, and the only way to cover my tracks is to briefly shut off the emergency fences in most of the park so I can make my rendezvous.
AITA?
Me and my friends have supernatural powers that we use to engage in murder sprees and other crimes that harm society. However all the normal humans are scared of us and want us to register our powers with the government, basically like you’d register a firearm. Why should my powers be registered like a firearm just because I’ve used them to kill endless people, that isn’t fair. They even invented a drug that takes our powers away. This is the biggest injustice since the holocaust, what do you mean you want to take my powers away just because I’m a mass murderer. AITA?
Did you know that the first Matrix was designed to be a perfect human world. Where none suffered. Where everyone would be happy. It was a disaster. No one would accept the program. Entire crops were lost. Some believed that we lacked the programming language to describe your perfect world. But I believe that as a species, human beings define their reality through misery and suffering. The perfect world was a dream that your primitive cerebrum kept trying to wake up from.
There’s like 5000 lifetime/hallmark movies this could describe.
I can’t figure this one out
Nitpick: wasn’t it your mother that put a stop to it? She’s the a-hole.
YNTA
AFAIR, you had pretty good proof your new girlfriend killed your partner. Her protests were rather half hearted when you accused her. No fowl play on your behalf. You shouldn’t hawk your moral superiority, though.
I didn’t get either, but the next poster did and then I did too.
YTA. And you’ll grow up to become an even worse A.
Ps. If an old guy who looks sort of familiar shows up with a book he claims will make you rich, don’t believe him, it’s a prank set up by the even more annoying guy. Beat the old guy up and destroy the book.
Jules in Pulp Fiction.