Pope Forced Into Retirement By Secret Vatican Gay Sex Club, Paper Says

Story here.

Not sure what to make of this. It sounds far too outlandish and Alexander VI-ish to be true, and yet given the various other dealings that the Church and secret societies in Italy have gotten up to in decades past, I wouldn’t be surprised if it was. Anyone know if this paper is at all credible?

It would explain how he dresses.

It’s all about the gays, isn’t it?

So gays are a bunch of sex-obsessed perverts who will go to the extremes of forming secret societies to infiltrate and destroy our cherished institutions.

On the other hand, the church leadership is a bunch of sexually-repressed geriatrics obsessed with demonizing and destroying the gays.

To paraphrase Tom Lehrer: “And everybody hates the gays.”

Homophobia is going to destroy all of us.

Yes, it certainly makes a lot more sense that an 85 year old man would retire because of a sex scandal than just because…he’s 85 freaking years old.

The Reppublica article seems to be citing something called “Vatileaks,” for what it’s worth.

Good lord! You don’t suppose they’ve managed to get into the entertainment business, do you?

I’m reminded of all the various “The Jews control everything!” conspiracies over the years. It has the same structure; “Group X is secretly behind everything and hugely powerful despite being constantly persecuted by the organization/society they supposedly control.”

A few years ago, the big story (aside from that silly pedo thing) was Priests and marriage - it seems that many of the clergy are gay (gasp! horror!) and certain Seminaries were ordered to purge all know-to-be-that-way students, and that doing so would, in some cases, pretty much empty the place.
That members of the one institution which made OK to never marry would be gay does not seem all that surprising.

I’m sure there are gay Cardinals, and I suspect there are people who hump in the Vatican.

I doubt that the situation is as out of control as to warrant an expose (put the silly mark over the second ‘e’).

Vatican has a secret gay sex club. So thats news? What next, surprise that the ocean have fish?

Nope, that the fish were behind the Pope’s resignation.

What’s the motive behind getting the pope to resign, unless they’re going to replace him with their guy?

You left out the Masons. I do think “the judeomasonic conspiracy” has a certain panache to it, a polysyllabic je ne sais quoi

Let’s not waste a once-in-four-hundred-year opportunity.
Let’s leak a story that says that those people forced our beloved papa out of office!

It’s the gay Jews that you REALLY have to look out for.

… That are Masons!

Yeah, La Repubblica is a real paper - one of the two or three most respectable in Italy. It’s on the left-wing side and, unless things have changed hugely in the last while, it’s no fan of the Catholic Church.

I do sort of like the idea of a Gay Leather Bar in one of the Vatican catacombs. I can almost see them rushing to the dance floor to go crazy during Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way!”

However, my own speculation is a diagnosis of Alzheimers and the fear that he would continue to live for 10+ more years but be unable to continue appearing in public or fulfilling any duties. Imagine if the US and UK had let Reagan or Thatcher remain in office until they died.

Despite the kneejerk reaction, there does appear to be some substance to the claims.

Given that the church has attracted, concealed and protected homosexual pedophiles for a very long time, what’s so shocking about the consideration that some large portion of the hierarchy is homosexual, and that some portion of that group would be active, and that something very much like a club, cult, or society would have grown up around it? The church is miter-deep in secret societies, passwords, symbols and the like.

ETA: Given that we’ve had some very feeble and incapacitated popes in the last couple of centuries, none of whom saw stepping down as an option, it’s also not beyond possibility that Benedict is being pressured in some unusual way.

As a gay man I’m furious about this accusation. Furious!!!.. that I never got to go to this club :frowning:

I agree with that sorta queeny gay guy being interviewed. The Pope wasn’t forced out by some secret cabal of gays in the Vatican. The Vatican is surely full of gays though and the year is 2013 and everyone has internet and cell phones and there are gay bars and gay restaurants and gay bed & breakfasts and most importantly gay communities (ghettos?) in most large cities so of course modern gays in the church have their day jobs and their private lives and they network and meet and did I mention they’re all over the place? It’s kinda the same in the military.

Straight people can be amazingly oblivious to it, and suddenly having your eyes opened to the fact that you’ve been working with and good friends with gays all along can be crushing to certain personalities. I think the realization that to many priests and others in the church, the church really is just their day job they love, but they have their own personal lives too and it’s just don’t ask don’t tell, is a real shock to the ol’ worldview.

I would not be surprised if an 85 year old had problems adjusting to the fact that his beloved church is way gayer than he thought.