I’ve got an odd one that I constantly catch myself doing. Instead of -ion, I’ll type -ino. So instead of, say, renditions, it comes out as renditinos. They all seem like exotic types of pasta.
Being a fast typist, I occasionally make the they’re/their/there mistake. I fully understand the different usages, but somehow my brain subconsciously picks out a phonetically equivalent substitute and sends the commands down to the muscles that work my fingers. With that in mind, I wonder if anyone has ever, completely innocently, meant to type Norfolk (Virginia) and typed Norfck instead? The second syllable of the city name soiunds almost like fck.
Don’t have the letter but my Grandfather dictated a letter to his secretary discussing “the irate customers”. Bearing in mind this was in Ireland, her letter describing how “the IRA ate customers” didn’t go down too well And knowing my Grandfather she wouldn’t have lasted long in that office either
Several years ago, the local community newspaper had a full-page ad on their back cover. It was from a local lumberyard, advertising their services for designing and building decks.
Except that in every occurance, deck was spelled dick. :eek:
It was great. “Nothing helps you enjoy your yard like a bigger dick.”
A used-to-be friend of mine went to Old Dominion University (in Norfolk, VA). He told me that the Norfolk High School cheer was*:
We don’t drink!
We don’t smoke!
Norfolk! Norfolk! Rah! Rah! Rah!
On a side note, I recalled a malapropism from my last job, wherein the writer said that the company had “made a conscience decision” to do something. The memo was discussing the most recent round of layoff rumours.
The most halarious one I’ve ever seen was sign in a mini mall out in California:
There was this beautiful Hot bodied Blonde woman that was selling some type of product (I think it was some kind of perfume or something, I can’t exactly remember). The company she worked for was offering free movie passes with every purchase. Over her head was this huge sign that was supposed to read.
Free pass with every purchase
Only problem was that someone had bumped her sign and knocked the letter “P” from the word Pass :eek:
The sign now read : Free ass with every purchase
So, while she stood there smiling at everyone who came near her trying to get them to “Take advantage of this great opprotunity”, someone finally pointed out to her the error on her sign, and she quickly found another letter "P"and repaired it. I’m just sitting here thinking now, " Man I wish they’d made cellphone camera’s back then
An article I read referring to the Pennsylvania Dutch was misspelled “Pennsylvania Butch”. A correction issued the next day corrected it to read “Pennsylvania Bitch”
Several years ago there was a sign in town that said “Lot for Sale” and that listed a number that potential buyers could call. One day somebody took the L off Lot and substituted a P.
The owner of the lot probably got a bunch of interesting calls that day.
I work for a literacy organization and received the following statement from a teacher on her end-of-year report: “Our students’ testes have improved dramatically in the past year.” (emphasis mine)
Wonder what kind of assessments they do at that school…
At my previous job I was editing a document typed up by the Croatian office girl whose grasp of English was still a bit shaky. I had asked her to change “the two” to “that” and she inadvertently changed it to … “twat”.
Poor girl had no idea why I was choked up laughing for the next several minutes.
I work for a Japanese company, and they are as bad as you think when it comes to Ls and Rs. (They also have trouble with H/F and B/V.)
My personal favorite involved our office manager. We were discussing our long-standing credits with Global Crossing (they can’t mail checks until they’re out of bankruptcy), and she wrote herself a note: “Call Grovel Crossing.” She had been calling the company “Grovel Crossing” for the last five years.
Saturday night, my husband and I went to Target. Part of their sign wasn’t working, so over the entrance was the message “Expect less.” Luckily, our digital camera was in the car.
Having been involved with journalism most of my life, I have see a number of them.
I worked with a gifted journalist one time who when sober was excellent and when drunk was not quite as good but still head and shoulders above most. Unfortunately she didn’t spell quite as well drunk as she did sober. She once did a headline that read.
Candidates to have pubic meeting
We should have caught that one before it went out.
My other favorite was an ad that a town sent into its local paper (a competitor of ours). They were trying to combat a spate of cars along the curbs of the community that were parked there and basically rusting away.
"Owners of such cars will be fixed and the cars will be towed away."
OK, promise you won’t laugh? When chatting on ICQ to a friend of mine, I commented that I really wanted a diet coke right now. Except, with me touch typing, it came out like this:
Cue much embarrasment on my part.
No, my mind’s not permanently pre-occupied. However, I do seem to be making that typo a lot. :eek:
Not a typo [I hope] Found on the BBC’s ‘Have your say’
“This is unbelievable human behaviour. I can’t believe this is happening in 2004. As a Muslim I can only say, we are not allowed to touch an innocent civilian!”
Imran Azim Butt, Doha, Qatar
*I don’t know wheter I should laugh or cry, at the man’s family name *
And knowing my Grandfather she wouldn’t have lasted long in that office either 
