Practical Jokes At Work

Friday night at work at Walgreens, shortly before closing time. I’m standing over by the top of the candy aisle, talking to a customer, telling him where to find something. And suddenly we both hear this weird…growling noise, emanating from my intercom speaker over by Register One. “Duuuuuckyyyyyy… Duuuuuckyyyyy… where aaaaaaaare you, Duuuuckyyyyy…heh heh heh…” Clearly the assistant manager du jour Has Had Enough For One Day, and really needs to go home.

The customer blinks. “Bwah?”
And I tell him, “It’s okay–it’s only Management.”

Well, mine is extremely simple, but it cracked us all up.

When a co-worker went to lunch and left his lab coat on the back of his chair, I tied a knot in one of the arms.

When he came back and tried to pull it on he was chatting to us and not looking at the coat. One arm went in fine, but the other one was stuck partway, so he was standing there talking to us while flapping his arm trying to unbend the sleeve, never checking what the problem was. Every now and then we’ll pull our arms up into our lab coat sleeves and flap them around just to tease him. It was great.

Back when I worked at a drugstore, we had these little stick-on theft prevention tags that would set off the alarm at the door. One night, our manager wanted to show us some little action figures he had bought (it was his hobby to collect them). So he went out to his car and came back with a bagful. As we looked at them together, I put a hand on his back and leaned over to see better, thereby attaching a tag to his shirt. When he went to put his treasures back in the car, the alarm went off and we had a nice time…“Uh, James, what else you got in that bag there? I’m afraid we’re going to have to confiscate that”, etc.

In the office I work at now, the computer guy has a little plastic alligator on his desk and I have a stuffed bumblebee on mine. We do things to each other’s creatures when the owner is away. For instance, last week, my bumblebee was hung from a noose. My best ones to date have been: 1. the time I chained his gator to the chair (using a very realistic Styrofoam chain which was lying around the office as a Halloween prop). 2. I have a very small calendar with kittens on it, so I took a kitten picture, cut out the face, and inserted the gator’s head. I guess these aren’t actual practical jokes, but it is fun setting up some little amusement for the other to find.

Another time, a snakeskin was found lying near the office coffeepot. Cue mass hysteria by co-workers. I borrowed the little plastic alligator, cupped it in my hands so only its scaly little tail was showing, and went around to various freaking-out people, asking, “Is this what you’re looking for?”

I worked on an assembly line for a couple of summers. The room had a concrete floor. One day, during lunch, a coworker and I superglued a nickel to the floor. As people came back from lunch, they’d stop and try to pick it up. That was hilarious enough, but the best was a woman that got really frustrated. She just had to have that nickel. She left and came back with a hammer and chisel. A couple of whacks later, she had a really pleased look on her face. “I just found me a nickel!”, she exclaimed, as she pocketed the coin which was still attached to a sizable chunk of concrete.

I hope she didn’t want it for the vending machine!

That was probably a good 27 years ago, and I’ve been wondering about that ever since.

No, it’s more like a bucket of prop wash.

Gah. I wish I had a good one for tomorrow. Maybe I’ll go make that ceiling cat and put it in the server room after all.

or a left-handed hammer? Or a counterclockwise nut driver? Or a snap-on buttonhole?

Or the surgeon asking for a pair of freshly autoclaved fallopian tubes?

The best prank is to take the stamps, (like the ones that say “done,” or “Sent” or “Confidential” and put the tops on backwards. That way when someone uses them the words are upside down.

Good prank and not to much trouble of getting the axe for it.

Or sending a probie firefighter to get a water hammer or a left-handed smoke shifter.

Or maybe the ignition keys to the cameras?

In Boy Scouts it’s the bacon stretcher…

This one kind of misfired, but it was funny as hell anyway.
There was this car dealership where the service manager was a joker. Birds of a feather flock together, and consequently so where most of his technicians.
The service manager always went out to the afternoon lunch wagon and got himself a 20oz. Pepsi (bottle w/ a metal screw cap)
So one day the technicians decided to put one over on him. At lunch they went to the 7-11 and bought a 20 oz Pepsi, brought it back to the shop and carefully opened it up making sure not to break off the metal tabs on the bottom of the cap. They ran a bead of super glue around the top of the bottle and re-capped it. The re-formed the metal tabs to look like the bottle was a virgin.
They placed in in the fridge and waited for the afternoon roach coach.
Roach coach shows up, they go out with the bottle and when the boss shows up, they hand it to him. He pays for it and then attempts to remove the cap.
RUUUUUNNNH! Damn this cap is tight
RUUUUNNNNHHH! Got it!
At this the technicians are going :eek: :confused:
The boss puts the bottle to his lips to get a nice big drink of Pepsi. Here is where the prank went south.
You see cold inhibits the setting up of super glue. The glue on the top of the bottle was still a little wet when it got to his nice warm lips. The one item in the entire world that super glue is unsurpassed at gluing is human skin.
The service manager could not get the bottle off of his lips.
The technicians had to get some Q-tips and acetone to get the glue to let loose.
The boss had chapped lips for a week or so after that.

The gals at the front desk put a “please use other door” sign on the incoming door yesterday, with an arrow pointing to the other door which also had a “please use other door” sign with an arrow pointing back to the first door. Mildly amusing.

I’ve heard of …

Can stretcher
Envelope stretcher
Aluminum magnets

It happened before I worked there, but an engineering firm had a sample of a new adhesive, quite strong stuff. Bored, at lunchtime someone went out and glued a 50p coin to the footpath across the road. Sure enough, it was a sum of money too great for someone to pass up and a string of people walked up to it, stooped over and strained to pick it up. But the bonus was that the BBC building in Belfast was about ten metres away and some of the victims, assuming it was a trick for TV, started waving at the building as they set off again.

In my troop it was the (previously mentioned) left-handed smoke shifter, the bear shooer, or the sky hook.

A fellow I knew told me about the time he worked in a theater summer camp, supervising the stagehands. On the first day of camp, he gave the campers a box of dirty old gels - the colored films that are placed on theater lights to create colored lighting - and a bucket of soapy water. He told the campers to wash the gels and left for a few minutes. The gels are, as you might guess from the name, made of gelatin. As the campers tried to wash them in the soapy water, the gels dissolved into goop. The supervisor returned to find the campers panicking, having ruined all the gels. He laughed and gave them the box of new gels he’d gone to get.