Predictions For the Year 2502

In another thread, I mentioned that Heinlein, Clarke, and Asimov will be remembered as the main figures of 20th century science fiction, with almost all other authors being obscure.

That got me thinking… What will the world’s culture look like in 500 years? How will they remember the 20th century?

  • Will MAS*H still be watched? Will there have been 10 MASH remakes by then?

  • Which authors from the 20th century will still be common names?

  • Will ‘retro’ revivals pop up from time to time like the current trend of ‘retro’ designed cars? Will we see a 2302 Camaro XXI that looks like a 1969 SS, except with maglev wheels?

  • What would it be like to live in a culture in which five hundred years of your history wasa recorded in intimate detail and stored digitally forever? Would we feel differently about the American Revolution if we had DVDs showing all the major events as they actually happened?

Any other strange thoughts along these lines? Would anyone like to make some predictions about what people will think about us 500 years from now?

As an Australian, I make only one prediction - one which leaves me incalculably embarassed AND perversely proud.

I predict that in 500 years, re-runs of The Crocodile Hunter will STILL be getting watched - if only because of all the footage of unspoilt bush and forests it contains.

You see, sadly, I ALSO predict that there’ll be bugger all unspoilt bush and forests in 500 years.

That year will mark the 584th anniversary of the Red Sox’s last ring.

Jedi, Orthodox Trekker (OST) and Reformed Trekker (ST:TNG and beyond) will be the dominant religions on the Earth. Jedi will have many denominations however due to arguments over which “Special Edition” of the sacred works is, in fact, canon; due to the Great Prophet Lucas putting out so many. But all Jedi denominations will warn against the End Times and the return of the Evil One to the Earth: Jar Jar.

The most famous 20th century authors in 2502: Dave Barry, Barbara Cartland, and John Grisham. The 20th century will be known as “The Era of No Taste.”

And people will still be making Ned Beatty/Deliverance/“squeal like a pig, boy” jokes…

Rock and roll will be thought of as a classical music. Grandparents will be wishing that the youth of the day listened to something quieter and less offensive, like Eminem.

Also, as an Australian, I predict the ABC will still be showing repeats of Fawlty Towers :smiley:

They’ll be wondering if in 23 years man will still be alive and woman can survive…

For 300 years the Genetic Blonde will be extinct, if you see a Blonde you can bet they’re be from a Bottle, the Drapes won’t match the Rug.

Cell phones will be thought controlled, so you’ll be walking along communicating with someone via telepathy.

For 300 years the Genetic Blonde will be extinct, if you see a Blonde you can bet they’re be from a Bottle, the Drapes won’t match the Rug.

But since all babies will be genetically enhanced and screened to allow parents to pick the qualities they want in their child, blondes will live on.

But no one will have to worry if guys make passes at girls who wear glasses anymore, unfortunately.

A bold new experiment will be attempted by Mars colonists who long to pursue their own happiness in their own way. They will write a Declaration of Freedom from the oppression of Emperor George XVIII and his Congress of Demoblicans. Those hardy settlers will win a war of revolution, and will finally establish Libertaria.

…but the Libertaria will be wiped out by non-property-owning Canadians, who will be stronger and fitter because of their state-funded health service and government issue rockets. :wink:

And maybe, if I’m still alive (cryogenically at least), I’ll finally get my personal hovercraft.

You mean your state-funded government issue hovercraft that meets only the minimal state-dictated standards and is manufactured by state-subsidized corporations shielded from liability, right? :wink:

Incidentally, Libertarians will cede to Canadians the Martian polar regions and, remarkably, this will appease them.

Forget the personal hovercraft…I wanna personal jetbelt! And a flying car!! And a pony!!!

My government manufactured personal hovercraft will indeed break down at every hoverway intersection, and I’ll have to fill out several thought-forms in triplicate to get the government repairbot to fix it. Sometimes this can take days. I’ll spend a lot of time sitting on astroturf verges.

Headlines on the Worldnews paper date Oct-8-2502:

AOL-TIME WARNER-DISNEY EAST GLOBAL HEMISPHERE INC. to merge with MICROSOFT WEST HEMISHPERE INC. citizens of the world worried about global monopoly.

In other news IMAC cultist vandalize the Bill Gates Shrine again.

OK, I see curwin already made the required Zager & Evans joke, so I’ll just mosey along . . .

Can’t believe I’m the first to say it…

The Rolling Stones will still be touring.

So the Hair Dressers quote “Only Your Hairdresser knows for sure” will be replaced by “Only your BioGeneticist knows for sure”.

We will either be beings so radically changes that we cannot be f recognized as Human, or be reduced to Stone Age Savagery, or…


Depending largely on the choices we make today.