You reasons can vary, as long as you explain them. I’ll get the ball rolling (heh) with some examples:
MLB
• Greg Maddux. The guy looks like an accountant, and yet is one of the premier location pitchers of his generation.
• Richie Sexson. A tall skinny volleyball playing looking dude. Just too skinny and tall to look like a baseball player.
• Matt Stairs. A beer leaguer that has somehow made it to the pros.
NBA
• Sean Bradley. An extremely tall skinny dude. I was going to pick Yao Ming but Bradley had him beat in the lanky department. As my friend appropriately called him, “The Death Stick.”
• Mike Bibby. I’m waiting for this play-by-play: “Bibby drives the baseline…fakes…pivots…and…ohmygod! He’s jumped onto Michael Finley’s back and is sucking all the blood out of him!”
• Steve Nash. I have no explanation other than he looks nothing like someone that can play professional basketball.
It’s not just the way he looks- Shawn Bradley has no business being a pro athlete!
Of course, the classic example was John Kruk of the Phillies, who (legend has it) once encountered a female fan, who saw the fat, disheveled Kruk smoking a cigarette, and sneered “You call yourself an athlete?”
Kruk nonchalantly answered “Lady, I ain’t an athlete- I’m a baseball player.”
In the Matt Stairs category you gotta add: Antonio Alfonseca, Rod Beck, David Wells and (of course) Fernando Valenzeula (sp?). I guess they might not count as highly as Matt since they’re all pitchers, but all the same, if I met them on the street–and didn’t recognize them–I’d be hard-pressed to believe they got paid for sports.
Randy Johnson. Intimidating as all-get-out on the mound. But, he’s nothing short of gangly with a bat, and especially when he’s running.
Johnny Damon looked like a baseball player until this year. Now? I picture him panning for gold somewhere. Or driving an 18-wheeler.
The one that always baffles me is Martin Gramatica - Kicker for the TB Buccaneers. He looks like an accountant or some other “behind a desk” type person.
I’m sure there is more I can’t think of right now…if I come up with them, I’ll just write again
Greg Luzinski looked like a guy who’d have a hard time making it to his bleacher seat without stopping for breath. Did ok, though.
One that sticks in my mind about him, though, was back when some friends and I were watching a simulated game of historic players on my computer. Luzinski tried to steal second. The catcher rifled the ball to the second baseman, who made the catch before Greg was even a third of the way there. While Greg kept on ‘running’, the computer waited around for a few seconds, figured the play was over, and then had the second baseman throw the ball back to the pitcher. After all this, ol’ Greg finally waddled his way into to second, and was called safe. His only stolen base of the season.
It’s kind of funny, up until recently I only listened to Sox games on the radio. I made a lot of remarks about what a perfect baseball name Johnny Damon is, and just kind of assumed he looked respectably baseball-y as well. Then I caught part of a game on TV a week or so ago. :eek:
He’s not as scruffy looking as Kruk* was, but…man.
*Not a man you want to encounter on an elevator after a game while wearing the opposing (and winning) team’s cap. Just so you know.
Note that Gramatica is 170 lbs. despite being only 5’8", so isn’t like he’s skinny or anything. Besides, he’s got long hair… what kinda accountant has long hair?
That’s far too intimidating a nickname to bestow upon Bradley. The only thing he could wipe out is the view of the person behind him in the movie theater.
