Don’t worry, jjimm, it can happen to anyone.
God help us all.
Cecil quotes data from Masters & Johnson on orgasms whereas all my experience comes from the combination of Johnson & Bush.
Hmmm? IMHO or MPSIMS?
MPSIMS it is, since this one has no chance of a factual answer to a question which is perhaps based on a false premise.
samclem GQ moderator.
As the OP is getting the info from porn, you better have your background music ready:
(Safe for work)
I get mine from Johnson & Johnson.
Personally, I’ve always enjoyed those noises, from the more soft, subtle “Uh, uh, uh,” to the “With a Rebel yell, she cried more, more, more!”
Signs of pleasant enthusiasm, that’s what we’re after.
But as a way of saying, “Come about a quarter of a cup in me and I might just have a baby,” I’m not so into that.
Yes, but why is that women tend to make more noise? I know that statement is painting with a broad brush, but men, in general, tend to not be as outgoing, or exuberant, even while having an incredible time. Is that from the men watching pornos, and the guy is just quietly plugging away? The chicken or the egg? Is that how people wish it was, therefore it is now becoming through porn? Or is that the way it is, and the pornos reflect that?
Sure, there is a factual answer: No. There is no psychological reason. --Shoshana, Psychologist, Psychology Instructor.
Nor is your assertion universally true.
I’m a screamer and I can’t help it. It just comes out naturally. Plus, I get more turned on when I’m noisy, as does my SO. And I LOVE when he’s noisy, I wish he’d be louder. In fact, just last night our neighbor banged on our bedroom wall. Apparently, we were getting a little TOO noisy.
Does life imitate porn or does porn imitate life? Or was it art?
And I know at least one guy who is not a quiet bed partner.
And I’m not just talking about his snoring…
I am loud in bed, though I wouldn’t go so far as to say I am a screamer, and my reason for it doesn’t have anything to do with turning him on (though if it does that good for him). I am just damned loud all the time. It is part of my personality, and it carries over into my sex life. I have also found that it is easier for a man to know when he is doing something right if I make happy little noises. Kind of like a sexual metal detector. “beep…beep…beep…YES!..YES!..OH GOD!”
I had one lover who would ocassionally pass out during orgasm, scared the hell out of me the first couple times. :eek:
To elaborate on this, the majority of porn is aimed at men rather than women. To the average heterosexual male, it’s a lot more arousing hearing a woman moan, grunt, and yell “Ooh baby, give it to me! Harder!” than hearing a man do so.
Okay, since I gave a joke answer before, I’ll repeat my own theory as to why men are quieter than women (which has more do with men being quiet than women being noisy):
Some men have gotten habituated to downplaying stimulation in bed. WIth women, it’s all about reaching orgasm, and the hell with delaying it because many women can have another orgasm (and another…), and sometimes reaching orgasm is difficult enough, so the more turned on they are, the better. There’s no downside to women IOW being maximally stimulated.
But guys, especially very young guys, create an embarrassing situation if they’re ready to pop off before they’ve got their socks peeled off their feet. Until a guy finds methods of deprogramming himself, he’s virtually pre-orgasmic as soon as he gets an erection, which does not lead to satisfying sex for anyone. So in the course of learning about his body, many young guys don’t WANT more stimulation, they want less. (As I explained to a young lady who didn’t quite believe me, I think, guys will think of baseball statistics and gorey defenestrations when they find themselves stimulated before they’re ready.) They will even have orgasms without letting on that they’ve had them, in the hope of getting another few seconds out of a detumescing penis before she realizes “Hey, what’s going on here? That thing used to be bigger, didn’t it?”–if sufficiently young, the guy’s penis may be ready to spring back into action before too much time has elapsed, so they just try to say as little as possible, which sometimes works out okay.
After a few years of stifling their ejaculations (VERBAL ejaculations) in this way, theyre conditioned to engage in silent sex, at least silent relative to their partners.
That’s my theory, anyway, why guys are quieter in bed than gals.
Women need to be noisy during sex.
**ALYSSA**
*At least you blame yourself for your
sexual inadequacies.*
** BANKY**
*No, I blame them. Chicks never help
you out. They never tell you what
to do. And most of them are self-
conscious about that smell factor,
and so most of the time they just
lay there, frozen like a deer in the
headlights, right? Not for nothing,
but when a chick goes down on me. I
let her know where to go, and what
the status is. You gotta handle it
like CNN and the Weather Channel -
constant updates.*
**HOLDEN**
*You’re such an idiot.*
**ALYSSA**
*No, he’s got a point. That’s how I
was in high school - I was nervous,
and inhibited about being eaten out.
But by the time I got to college,
that all changed. I loosened up.
Not only did I learn to communicate -
I learned to be bossy. I was like
one of those guys at the airport
with those big flash lights - waving
them this way, directing them that
way, telling them when to stop.*
The answer isn’t psychological, it’s physiological and was determined many years ago…
An angel is looking over God’s shoulder and asks, “Hey-I recall you placing around a million nerve endings in Adam’s penis, but you’re putting almost 5 times that many nerves in Eve’s clitoris. What’s up with that?”
God grins and says, “It’s neat to hear her screaming my name.”
I am SO happy that I put down my can of soda before I got to your post. I’d hate to get orange fanta all over my keyboard, monitor, and film scanner.
It’s funny that I get chastised around here for my questions, but after reading some of these replies, it’s amazing that some of you people have enough maturity to even operate a computer, let alone answer a serious question on this site.
Hey, anyone can learn how to type one handed with practice.