^ Not the “Duck” sound, oddly enough. “Sonar” does.
I could change it to the Spring sound, but if was in my cargo khaki shorts pocket and it went “Boi-yoi-yoi-yoi-yoing,” people might get the wrong idea.
Mary Had a little lamb,
Hickory Dickory Dock.
If he hollers, let 'em go
Lizard poisons Spock.
Treehouse was a llama
now my story’s told…
Peas Porridge in a Pot NINE DAYS OLD!
Here’s my theory of the classic Popeye/ Olive/ Bluto triangle:
Popeye is the most dog-shit ugly guy you ever saw, and Olive is the scrawniest, boniest woman ever. They stick with each other because no one else wants them. But then Bluto comes along. Bluto is a pervert- he has a fetish for anorexic women; he masturbates to photos of concentration camp survivors. So naturally he goes gaga over Olive. At first Olive is flattered by his attentions and so lets him come on to her (and fight Popeye for her), but when she realizes just how base his interest in her is, she screams for help, Popeye pulls out the spinach, and Bluto gets his balls broken.
Lumpy, I agree with your assessment except that you should know Olive is really a guy. Everything else is true.
Bluto is actually after Swee’ Pea.
Wimpy has an eating disorder and a gambling problem.
Doesn’t Alice the Goon post on SDMB? We could get HER slant.
Reposted from “Abusing Infants” thread:
When I go past the rabbit cage, I sing this (to the tune of “Black Betty”):
Whoa-oh, fat rabbit, wham-ba-lam, whoa-oh, fat rabbit, wham-ba-lam.
Fat rabbit is a punk, wham-ba-lam, he got junk in da trunk, wham-ba-lam.
That’s all I got.
Oh God, I just had to test Rule 36 and image search Anorexic Porn. My eyes!
Here - look at some sheep porn. It’ll help.
Well, no wonder, you should test rule 34 instead.
Oh, no, no, no! I fell for that, once; the screen said the President was coming to get me and throw me in Federal prison on Mars! The Prez can’t do that–can he?
“Poo-Pourri”?(video) Yeah, no, I have to smell enough perfume in my life as it is.
Why does YouTube’s various News Bloopers Compilation vids always have thumbnails of good-looking stacked anchorwomen showing lots of cleavage, but they’re never included in the vid?
Is that pronounced “poopery”?
Isn’t that where you go to…never mind.
Last night I dreamed of a pizza that would scream when you tried to eat it. Everyone considered it a delicacy.
Last night I dreamed I was shooting a music video of a heavy metal group in a snowstorm. I hate snow, not fond of heavy metal and have no use for music videos. What does it mean?
You want to be a film producer, you feel you are a special snowflake and you lack iron in your diet? 
My “Interpretation of Dreams” book (published in 1899) says that it’s Oedipal.