Putcher Hated Holiday Songs Here

“I like a sleighride…I like a sleighride…” Who did that? Leggy Pee, er Peggy Lee?

Is Scarlet Ribbons a Christmas song? No matter, it’s glurge.

“Squeeze me I rattle…Pinch me I cry…” That horrific fundamentalist nose-job-that-walks-like-a-woman, Cristy Lane, has that one in her TV ad. Dammer t’hell.

Whatever this thing is called…Come on, it’s lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you… I can’t think of the title, but I really hate it.

 "Christmas time is here"  ?   from the Charlie Brown Christmas special.  Good lord, how depressing is this song?

I’ve said this many times, but “Do they know it’s Christmas?” is quite possibly not only the worst holiday song ever recorded, but the worst song of any genre ever recorded.

He became a talk-radio host. No idea what’s up with the invisible font though.

Since you like Bowie and Bing, try Bing and Ella Fitzgerald singing about Rudolph.

Damn right! I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: “Hey, Babs, would it kill you to pick a tempo and stick with it?”

Without a doubt.

I thought the song was written for Ethopia, which has a mainly Christian population. Don’t know if they celebrate Halloween in wherever the hell they recorded Do They Know It’s Halloween? for, however.

That’s what Wikipedia says.

Without editorializing:

Christmas Shoes
Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time
Little Drummer Boy
Mr. Santa (not mentioned yet, by Amy Grant and it destroys whatever fun there was in Mr. Sandman)
Santa Claus is Coming to Town Especially Bruce Springsteen’s version
All I want for Christmas is You

So when did radio stations pick up on “I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas”? I’ve loved that song for years, but it was always this obscure oldie that I had taped off of the Doctor Demento show about 25 years ago. I’d go around singing it and no one else had ever heard of it. I even got a silver hippopotamus figurine for Christmas a few years ago. It’s a crying shame if this once-offbeat novelty has turned into an overplayed annoyance on the level of the abominable “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer.”

Oh, and the McCartney song is called “Wonderful Christmastime”; no “simply having” in the title. Yeah, I like that one, too.

Here Comes Santa Claus.

I swear, that song must have been written in three minutes. It’s one of the worst songs I’ve ever heard, let alone the worst Christmas songs.

Here comes Santa Claus
Here comes Santa Claus

OK, so Santa is approaching. I don’t know how we’re supposed to know this, given that he only comes when we’re asleep and under the cover of night. This is the most boring opening someone could come up with for “write a song about Santa Claus,” IMHO.

Right down Santa Claus Lane

WTF? A Lane? He’s just walking down a stupid road? I thought he flew right to my house on a sleigh! And why the hell is the road named after Santa? Does this make any sense at all?

Vixen and Blitzen and all his reindeer

The poor nameless ones.

Pullin’ on the reins

So wait–is he on a sleigh? Or is the sleigh in the lane? Santa Claus Lane? Or in the sky?

Bells are ringin’, children singin’
All is merry and bright

Fluffy Christmas imagery with no content. A first-grader wrote this as a poem to his mom somewhere. A first-grader who has somethin’ against the letter “g.”

Hang your stockings and say your prayers

My prayers? Wha? This is a religious song? You’re telling me to pray?

'Cause Santa Claus comes tonight!

Oh, I’m praying so that Santa comes to my house and gives me stuff. I guess that’s one reason to get all religious. Yay.

I need to vent my seconding for HATING this crappy piece of dreck. Now, i love christmas music. I listen to it all year long, have tons of it on mp3, etc. When this comes up on the satellite radio xmas station, I just cringe. Sometimes I need to shout profanity, in a desperate reach to retain my sanity.

This song i think was composed my committee, sitting down and coming up with every banal cliche in the book.

Sloppy poor kids - Check
Christmas eve - Check
Parents Death - Check
Childs choir in the background - Check
God reminding some dude about christmas- check

Then I think I figued out a coping mechanism this year… finally. I just picture the kid buying these shoes for mom :slight_smile:

SCiCTT does have a unique mix of secular and religious imagery – “Santa knows we’re all God’s children, ‘n’ that makes everything right…Let’s give thanks to the Lord above, cuz SC is comin’ tonight.” Unusual, to say the least.

For further reference see The Boondocks and the three previous days leading up to it.

Great stuff!

My mistake: it’s Here Comes Santa Claus, not Santa Claus is Coming to Town, that has the secular/religious lyrics.

I heard this horrible recording the other day. It wasn’t a song as such. It was this guy reciting a Night Before Christmas type poem in which Santa, while out on his rounds encounters a soldier living in squalor (the GI was sleeping on the floor, for some reason). The “poem” goes on for some time with jingoistic talk of how the soldier was a hero, yadda, yadda…I don’t remember the whole thing because I slipped into a diabetic coma from the sugary overload. Anybody know what I’m talking about? I need to know who to do bodily harm to.

I’d also like to know who decided My Favorite Things was a Christmas song.

I hate all Christmas songs. I love the old Christmas hymns and carols, except “Silent Night” and “Away in a Manger.” But the stuff you hear on the radio, and in every friggin store you go into? It’s nothing but a pile of steaming elephant turds. That includes faux carols, like “Little Drummer Boy.”

The worst of the lot? Sing along with Mel and Me:
“Chestnuts roasting on an open fire,
Jack Frost nipping at your nose…”

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

It’s around but, to my knowledge, doesn’t get much play. The only time I’ve heard it this season was on WASH on the way home Saturday night and that was because someone requested it.

Oops, that’s the one I came into this thread to complain about it. And not coincidentally, it was what I was woken up to this morning. There’s something about Nat King Cole’s voice that just grates.

And I always cringe when I hear “I’m dreaming of a whi-i-i-i-ite Christmas.” It sounds to me like an anthem of race-hate.